


Waiting in your past

by AnkaBaiam



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: 1950s, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Raphael Santiago, Bad Parent Maryse Lightwood, Bad Parent Robert Lightwood, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Violence, Drama, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I should've told you that earlier, I'll add more as we go, M/M, Raphael has hard life, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Suicide Attempt, Time Travel, drunk!Alec, everyone has hard life, from now on the tags are spoilers, so much drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-07-05
Packaged: 2019-05-07 01:40:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 28
Words: 78,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14660676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnkaBaiam/pseuds/AnkaBaiam
Summary: "What day is today?" He asked, his chest clutching. The man hesitated for second. "Thursday 14th, September," he said. Good, same as I remember... Alec thought. "1950." the stranger finished. "What?!" Alec gasped. "1950??"AKA: Alec somehow gets 68 years in past, more precisely in 1950. Here he meets Magnus & his friends. There are some parallels going on. Everything is connected.(ON HOLD)





	1. Welcome in 1950

**Author's Note:**

> Okay guys, this will be fun, fluff, romance but it will also get pretty dark :/ (just can't stay away from the drama, can I?). I will try to post 1-2 per week :)  
> Some things will be same, some will change (a lot)

Mr. Ba-Li was there as long as Alec could remember.

He was like Alec's grandfather. Like his best friend he never had. Like someone Alec could always count on. But all this was suddenly endangered.

Right now Alec was standing in the hospital room. The doctors informed him that the old man had hours of life maximally.

Alec walked to the man. "Hi." He whispered as he sat next to his bed. "How do you feel?" He asked him. The old man smiled. "I've been better." He chuckled, but Alec couldn't smile. He wasn't ready to loose him.

"Oh Alexander," the old man said, "don't cry, we will see each other soon again." He said quietly. Alec looked at him, not sure what the old man what talking about.

"There are still so many things you've never told me." He said, pushing his tears away. "I did Alexander, I told you everything. Just remember." Alec shook his head. "You never told me what is your name. Or who broke your heart. Why you lived alone for the rest of your life. Where-" "Alexander," the man interrupted him, "it doesn't matter. After all... You'll figure it out sooner or later." He paused, looking at him, "But one thing remember. He never broke my heart. He made my life so much better and I just never found the right person after he left." He said quietly, tears in his eyes. "That is love, Alexander, and once you meet your soulmate... World can't be any better." _He,_ Alec thought, _so Mr. Ba-Li had a male partner. Maybe that's why he reacted so well when Alec told him about himself being gay..._ "What was his name?" Alec asked, suddenly wanting to know more. The old man never told him about his past. Alec asked many times, trying  to get to know him better,  but he never answered him on his questions. He would only shook his head and look out of the window. They were there for few minutes, complete silence in the room, before the old man looked back on Alec.

"Just..." He started, looking for the right words, "just be yourself Alexander, he will love you. It's going to be hard, you're going to fight, but don't you dare to give up on him." Alec frowned, not sure whom is he talking about. "Who are you talking about?" He asked quietly. "You'll will know, when you find him." "Who?" "Your soulmate." The old man smiled and pressed his hand. "No matter what you do Alexander, there will always be someone who will love you." He continued and Alec couldn't help but start to cry. It sounded like goodbye. He wasn't ready to let go. He needs more time. "Don't be scared my boy." the man whispered, "I know it will be weird," he chuckled, "everything will be weird and so new… but don't be scared. You'll be alright." Alec shook his head. "What are you talking about?" he asked, "I don't know what you're talking about." The old man tightened the grip, holding Alec's hand that it almost hurt. "It was so beautiful life," he cried, "but then you died." Alec stared at him. "What are you talking about?" "You wanted truth Alexander?" the man shook his head, "He died and it hurts." Alec moved away from him. "You left me alone." there suddenly was angriness in his voice. "You promised me forever."

Alec gasped. "I am not him, Mr. Ba-Li!" he cried, desperated, not knowing what's happening, "Whoever broke your heart, it's not me, it's me Alec!" The old man looked at him. "You're right." he said quietly, "You're not him. I am sorry." Alec nodded, drying his tears. "What was his name?" he asked. The old man chuckled. "You don't ever give up, do you?" he chuckled and Alec forced a smile. "A.G." he whispered, "My Angel." he paused, "Now go on." He said, "I don't want you to be here when I leave." The old man said, tears in his eyes. Alec looked at him. "I am sorry." "Go find me." He said quietly that Alec almost hadn't hear him. "No," Alec shook his head, "you're not dying." He cried. "Not today." Mr. Ba-Li smiled sadly on him, looking on the clock next to his bed. "I have last 2 minutes." He whispered. "How do you know?" Alec asked, his last hope disappearing. The old man looked at him.

"You told me Alexander." Alec shook his head _. What_? "I waited for you so long and finally..." He said and that was the last thing he ever heard from the old man. The machines he was connected to started beeping and the nurse sent Alec away from the room.

After few minutes the flat beeping sounded through the whole hall and Alec knew. It was too late. Mr. Ba-Li was gone.

He felt the tears coming from his eyes. He wasn't sure where he was walking, but he needed to get out from the hospital.

He didn't hear his siblings calling him. He didn't hear the doctors trying to talk to him. He didn't see anything. He was empty inside at that moment.

 

He was walking in the dark streets of the city, without any concrete goal. The sun was slowly coming out when he found himself standing before the bridge that led to their neighborhood. He stood there, on the bridge, for few minutes, watching the sun come out. Soon he continued walking on the other side of the bridge. When he was in the middle he heard evil screeching behind himself. He looked behind himself and the last thing he saw were strong car lights coming his way. The next thing he knew was falling in the cold river under the bridge and cold water and darkness surrounding him.

 

~~~

 

When he woke up again, he felt the cold water around himself. He couldn't breathe. He swam up on the surface, gasping for breath. Luckily there was ground near. Alec managed to swim there, using some of the last strength he had. Once he walked out of the water, he found out that he was completely naked. _What?_ He thought. _What even happened?_ It was cold outside. He was standing there, unsure what he should do. He should probably just go home, or find someone to help him.  But his body wasn't listening to him. He was standing there few minutes until the voice disturbed him.

 

"Well hello there." He suddenly heard a flirtatious voice. Alec looked up and saw an Asian man. His hair was brushed up all the way up and on his face was put a make up. Which by the way made his eyes more come out. The stranger had nice eyes. And face. He was nice. Alec for second forgot how to breathe, or that he wasn't wearing any clothes. The stranger noticed as he checked him out with smile.  Approving of what he saw.

Alec looked down on his naked body and quickly covered his intimate parts with his hands. Again he felt cold and his whole body was shaking. He wanted to say something, to shout or to walk away, but his body wasn't listening to him.

The man wasn't smiling anymore, instead he frowned. "Are you okay?" He asked carefully. Alec was looking desperately at him. He tried to say something, but his voice was gone. He tried again. "I ... am... cold..." He whispered, feeling so weak. His voice betrayed him and before he could say anything, the other man was already walking to him, taking his coat off and putting it quickly over Alec. "Thank you...." Alec managed to whisper very quietly not sure if the other man heard him. "Magnus. My name is Magnus." He introduced. Alec looked up at Magnus, "Alexa- Alec." He introduced himself. Suddenly the ground under him shook and Alec almost fell if it weren't for Magnus who caught him at time and helped him to sit down on the ground.

"What happened Alec?" He asked him, his hand on Alec's back brushing, warming him lightly.  Alec looked at him, trying to find the right words. His head was spinning. "There was a car accident," He remembered, "the car went off the road..." He paused, his memories slowly coming back, "it... It pushed me down..." Magnus' hand was still on Alec's back, brushing slowly, "I fell... From the bridge..." He said as he remembered. "I felt from that bridge... And it was so cold..." His breathe quickened, "I couldn't breathe... It was so dark..." He didn't hear Magnus calling his name, until the older man took Alec's hand in his. "Alexander," he said quietly, "what bridge?" Alec looked at him. "That one." He said and pointed the way. But there was no bridge. Alec gasped. "But... But... I fell from there... I..." He was hyperventilating. What was happening? How could the bridge disappear?? "I swear I am not crazy!" He shouted. "I am not crazy!" He said once again, reassuring himself. "I am not crazy..." Magnus pulled away from him. Alec quickly looked up at him. "What is happening?" He asked him. For help. For answers. Magnus looked on Alec and back on the place where should have been the bridge. "You couldn't fell from that bridge," he said quietly, "they are just planning building it..." Alec frowned when Magnus looked back at him.

"What day is today?" He asked, his chest clutching. _What day is today?_ Magnus thought for second. "Thursday 14th, September," he said. _Good, same as I remember..._ Alec thought. "1950." Magnus finished. "What?!" Alec gasped. "1950??" He started shaking again. "What sick game are you playing?" He shouted on Magnus, the other man carefully walked closer to him, his hand moving to Alec's hip. Alec tried to move away, but Magnus pulled out newspapers from the coat pocket, pulling away from Alec. "Here." He said, showing him the newspapers. He wasn't lying. Somehow he was 68 years in past.

He started hyperventilating. His body was shaking. He stood up and tried to calm down. It didn't work. He felt like crying. What's happening? It must be just a bad dream right?

Suddenly Magnus pulled him closer, hugging him tightly. "Breathe with me Alexander." He said kindly, his hands brushing his back calming him down. "It's going to be okay." Alec tried to calm down.

How he hell did he got from 2018 to 1950?


	2. Running in cold nights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So you're from 2018?" She just asked, trying to understand. Alec nodded. "So you were in the park..." "Because I thought that maybe jumping could get me back." Alec finished. The woman was quiet for while.  
> "But what if you died instead?" She asked. Alec shrugged. "I wasn't thinking about it really." He admitted, ashamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some draaama ahead, but it will be alright, no serious harm done

Magnus waited until Alec calmed down a little and then managed to took him back at his flat. He probably should go to hospital or at police station, but there was something about the younger man, that made Magnus thought it will be better for him to take him to Magnus' flat.

He tried talking to Alec, make sure he is still conscious, but the man wasn't much talkative. In the end Magnus finally got him in the bed and covered him in extra blankets to make him warm. Then he prepared some clean clothes for Alec and put them on the chair standing next to the bed, leaving Alec to get some rest.

Magnus was standing on the balcony of his flat looking outside, thinking.

Alexander didn't seem to be some crazy person, and Magnus believed him when he said he fell from the bridge. The bruises on his body said so at least. But from _when_ must he then come? Future? But how could that be possible? And then, there was something about Alexander… that made Magnus feel, somehow… he wasn't quite sure how to explain it.

His thoughts interrupted by light knock on the door. He completely forgot about the friend coming over. He walked around the bedroom, carefully closing the door not to wake Alec and headed to the main one. "Good afternoon," he greeted the man, opening the door. "Not so good day Magnus." he said, smiling kindly on him. "So," Magnus closed the door and pointed in kitchen, "how can I help you Raphael?" he asked. He let him sit to the table before offering him a cup of tea. The other man shook his head, "Water is fine." he said politely. "What's wrong Raphael?" Magnus asked, Raphael was a friend who was seeing him for few years now and they got quite along with each other. "Family's mess." the man sighed. "I'm sorry." Magnus said as he put the glass in front of Raphael. "You know you are always welcome here Raphael." The man was looking at him, "You are like my brother Raphael, don't you forget that." He smiled on him kindly. Raphael nodded. "Thanks Magnus, as always."

They just sat there for while, but it wasn't uncomfortable silence. "How's Rosa?" Magnus asked, Raphael looked at him. "She's good. I mean… with the fights at home… she sure is scared…" Raphael paused, "As long as I am there, noone's gonna hurt my small sister." he said. Magnus adored Raphael for his loyality torward his family. "Where is she now?" he asked. Raphael looked out of the window and back on Magnus. "With Cat, seems she and Madzie get along pretty well." Magnus chuckled. "So they are friends now again?" Raphael scoffed. "That was last week okay? Now they are besties again." Magnus laughed and shook his head. "Girls," he sighed, "I will never understand women." "Oh, does any man?" Raphael added and laughed. "You should bring her for dinner someday." Magnus offered. "I will," Raphael agreed, "she misses you as well." Magnus smiled, "Last time she told me there were fireflies in her room, when she slept there." Magnus chuckled. "No idea what's she talking about." he said ironically. "Such a waste of your magic Mags." Raphael teased him. "But seriously Mags, they could've find you." "It's not." Magnus answered seriously. "I don't care how dangerous it is. She deserves nice things." "Thank you Magnus." Raphael said quietly. "Don't thank me," Magnus shook his head, "she's like my sister as well." "I don't know what we would do without you." "You would've figured out something." Magnus assured him.

Magnus was cleaning in the apartment few hours later after Raphael has left, when he heard the thump from the bedroom.

Did he just... Fell from the bed? Magnus thought as he walked in the room. Indeed. Alec was just standing up from the floor, confused, looking around himself. He was breathing quick, holding his head in his head. "No, no, no." He continued to whispering. Magnus figured he had a nightmare. "Alexander," he said carefully, slowly coming closer to the younger man, "you're okay. Alright?" The younger man looked at him with tears in his eyes. "I'm going crazy." He whispered, tears finally falling from his eyes. Magnus came closer to him, hugging him. _What are you doing? He's just a stranger. He might be crazy after all!_ His brain shouted, but Magnus ignored it. His heart told him that the man needed help. That he wasn't lying.

"You're not crazy." Magnus whispered, his arms around Alec, "I believe there's an explanation." He pulled away from the man, "How about we get some sleep and tomorrow we will try to figure it out, sounds okay?" Alec nodded, drying his tears.

"Will you...?" Alec whispered shyly. "Will I what?" Magnus asked him. "...stay with me?" Alec said quietly avoiding his look. Magnus smiled. This man. "Okay," He said quietly, _WHAT ARE YOU DOING MAGNUS?_  "just let me change into something comfortable." _DON'T, MAGNUS, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM!_

As he came back in the bedroom, Alec was already lying in the bed on the right side of it. Magnus slowly walked to the bed not to wake Alec and lied next to him, making sure Alec had enough space, slowly falling asleep.

When he woke up few hours later to the shouting he was surprised by the warmth surrounding him. He opened his eyes. Alec. Magnus completely forgot about Alec who was now lightly pressed to Magnus. His head resting on Magnus' shoulder and his arm around Magnus' waist. _Shit._ He was shaking and murmuring something. Magnus realized that he was having another nightmare. "Alec." he tried to wake up the man, "Alec, wake up." sitting on the bed, he turned on the lamp next to the bed, "Alexander!" he called the man somewhat louder. He finally woke up. "What?" he asked, looking how terrified Magnus looked, "I am sorry." he suddenly whispered and sounded so guiltly, that Magnus just couldn't be angry at him. "Just get some sleep okay?" Magnus said, turning off the lamp, falling asleep again.

When he woke up, it was already morning. Magnus looked on his left. Alec was still sleeping. He looked so peaceful just laying there. Magnus slowly and carefully pulled away from him and left the bed not wanting to wake up Alec.

As Magnus was eating a breakfast in silence, when he realized, that Alec probably needs help. After all, the bruises on his body looked pretty bad. He would talk to Catarina he decided in the end. But first, he has a client to come.

The girl came an hour later. Magnus invited her inside and they were just standing in Magnus' working office. It was dark in there, only lamp lighting in there. The job Magnus is doing isn't exactly let's say… legal. "So," Magnus said as he closed the door behind them, "how can I help you young girl?" The girl looked at him with big blue eyes. "I need help for my mother," the girl squeaked quietly, "please Mr. Bane, you have to help her." Magnus nodded. "Of course I will, that's what I do." The young girl smiled, "Unfortunately I don't have that much money to offer…" Magnus sighed. "It doesn't matter, alright?" he smiled on her, "Let's just say, you will owe me one, okay?" The girl agreed. "So what shall be the problem?" he asked her. "She isn't sleeping, sometimes she's talking to people that are not there, she is still my mother, but sometimes… it's as if someone replaced her… or possessed her." Magnus frowned, thinking.

"Alright, I think I know what could help." he said in the end, he put a small bottle on the table in middle of the room and put in few things. He mixed them. Cooked them. Shook them. In the end he used his magic to finish the potion and transfered it in the small bottle. He then handed this bottle to the young girl. "Here," he said, handing her the bottle, "Give this to your mom to drink every night." the girl nodded, "Only few drops!" Magnus warned. "Thank you sir." the girl said, as she hugged him. Magnus chuckled for himself.

When he said goodbye to the girl, he looked on his small watch. Oh dear! He was running late to his lunch with Catarina. He quickly checked on Alec who was still sleeping and left the apartment.

"Hi, sorry I am late." Magnus excused as he sat to the table in front of Catarina, "Client." he added. The woman smiled on him. "I wouldn't dare to expect you to come on time." she teased with smile. Magnus made face on her. "Did you order already?" he asked, the woman shook her head. "Very well then. My treat." he said, opening the Menu.

"So," Catarina asked him when they finished their food, "what is it on your heart?" Magnus looked on her. She knew him so well. "I just, uhm, need your medical help with something…" he explained, "Of course, who or what are we talking about?" "A man, I found him two days back," Catarina frowned at him, "It's… hard to explain.." Magnus sighed, "He says he fell from bridge, bridge that is not even standing there." "He could be crazy," Catarina offered, "you let him at your flat?? Alone? Magnus!" she sounded upset. "Cat," he said seriously, "you haven't seen him." he sighed again, remembering Alec's face when he found out that it was 1950… he felt bad for him, "He says he's coming from future." the woman laughed, "Seriously?! Magnus, you need to send him to police, or… or hospital." "I can't Cat," Magnus growled, "I don't know why, but there's something about him, you haven't seen him… I trust him, I do." Catarina rolled her eyes. "I am coming with you just because I worry about you." Magnus forced smile. "Thank you."

"There's something else, isn't there?" Magnus looked at her, frowning, "What are you talking about?" Catarina looked at him but didn't say anything.

After Magnus paid for the lunch both of them headed to Magnus' apartment.

Something was wrong. Magnus could feel it. And one look on the opened door to his apartment and all his fears were fulfilled. He ran in the bedroom and found and empty bed. "Alexander?" He called, but got no response.

He was gone.

 

~~~

 

When Alec woke up from another nightmare, he sighed and just layed on the bed, looking up on the ceiling.

No. No. No. No. No. This was not happening. It couldn't. No. No. Please.

He got up from the bed and saw the clothes folded over the chair. He got dressed and walked in the kitchen.

He was alone. Magnus was gone. He was in past. He was lost. He was crazy. He was alone.

He didn't even notice that he started breathing quickly. Alec couldn't be in the flat anymore. He ran out of the flat, leaving the door open behind himself.

He wasn't sure where he was running. He was somewhere in the city streets, running around. He needs to get to the park. He needs to find the bridge. Maybe if he jumps... Maybe he can get back.

Alec didn't even notice how dark it got when he finally reached the park. Huge lamps were shining lightly. Lighting up the small roads. He ran by memory where he knew the bridge used to be- will be standing. But Magnus was right. It wasn't there yet.

He groaned as he stood there. Breathing quickly. Shaking in the cold.

And then he saw it. There was a small hill with a view on the town. Maybe if he stood on the brick wall... Maybe it could be enough for it to bring him back... In future...

He wasn't fully aware what he was doing. His legs were not listening to him. They just kept walking torward the wall. He climbed on it and breathe.

There was whole city below him. House's windows slowly lighting up. It was beautiful view. Alec felt the tears in his eyes.

He just wanted to go home. He wanted to home. Was it too much to ask?

He looked up and saw the stars shinning. Orion was there. He used to look at it with Isabelle. Who must have been worried sick about him.

He closed his eyes and took deep breath. Please, I want to go home. He begged.

"Hey!" He heard man voice behind himself. "Are you okay?" A woman asked him. Alec started shaking. "I just want to go home." He cried. "Hey, hey," the woman said calmly, standing carefully on the wall next to him, "it's alright, breathe." Alec looked on her, tears streaming down his face, "Please, I just want to go home." "Okay," the woman said, handing him her hand, "we will get you home okay?" She said and Alec hesitated before taking her hand. She sat and dragged Alec with her. The man who shouted on Alec before walked over to them. "You okay here?" He asked and the woman looked up on him. "Should I call someone?" She shook her head. "We will be okay, thank you." The man nodded and left them alone.

Alec was still quiet. Trying to calm down. To silence his thoughts. The woman spoke up first. "My name's Maia." She introduced and Alec looked on her. She had darker skin and short curly hair. She looked nice. "Alec." He whispered. "Nice to meet you Alec." She said. She sounded so kind. So caring. "Thank you." He whispered again, looking at her. She offered him smile, "How about we go get some drink and you tell me what's on your chest, hm?" She said and Alec thought about it for while. "Okay." He said in the end, nodding.

She took his hand carefully and led him through the park back to the dark streets of the city. And Alec let himself being dragged. After few minutes the girl stopped before small bar. Hunter's Moon it said. "But it's closed." He pointed out, when Maia tried opening the door. "And I have the key." She said with smile. Unlocking the door and inviting Alec inside.

"Can we be here?" He asked unsure. "Of course we can. I work here... Family business." She announced proudly as he turned on the lights. "Take a seat." She pointed to the bar and went behind it. "So what will it be?" Maia asked, looking on Alec and the choice of the alcohol the bar had. "I... Um.. I don't have any money." "No problem, it's on the house." Maia chuckled. "Anything strong will do." The woman nodded pouring him something in the glass and handing it to him. When she made herself a drink she held the glass up. "Cheers." "Cheers." Alec nodded and both of them drank. "Wow..." Alec chuckled, "That's strong." Maia laughed as she sat next to him.

She didn't say anything. Giving Alec time to think about it. To find the right words.

"You're not gonna believe me." He said then and Maia looked at him. "You don't know me Alec." She said, "I've heard things, stories, I will believe you." Alec looked on her with big hazel eyes.

"My friend died recently," Alec took a deep breath, "and when I was going from the hospital... There has been a car crash and... The car pushed me from the bridge in the river." He looked on Maia who was patiently listening to him. "I woke up and I found out that I am in 1950... 68 years in past... And the bridge I fell... Isn't even standing there." He waited for Maia expression. The girl breathed in. "So you're from 2018?" She just asked, trying to understand. Alec nodded. "So you were in the park..." "Because I thought that maybe jumping could get me back." Alec finished. Maia was quiet for while.

"But what if you died instead?" She asked. Alec shrugged. "I wasn't thinking about it really." He admitted, ashamed. Maia sighed. "Look, I know you are so fucking confused now Alec, but don't do it this way." Alec looked at her, "If you die trying, there is no point in doing it anyway." She was right. "I am sure there was some reason. There has to be some way to get you back but... Not like this, okay?" She touched his shoulder, "You don't have to be alone in this." Maia poured them more drink. "I know.... what it is like... To be alone. So if you ever need anyone to talk... I am here." Alec smiled, "Does this mean we are friends?" He joked and Maia laughed. "Of course Alec, you're always welcome here."

They were sitting there, drinking, in silence. "Why do you trust me?" Alec suddenly asked her.  Maia looked at him. "I have my own experience with ... Weird things happening." She said quietly. "But that's story for another night." Alec nodded. "Okay." "Okay."

"Do you have someplace to stay?" Maia asked. Alex suddenly gasped. "Magnus. I forgot about him! He must be looking for me." "Magnus?" Maia asked. "He's the man who found me... But I don't remember where is he living." Alec realized with a shock. "I am never gonna see him again." He cried. That was the alcohol talking. "Magnus Bane?" Maia asked him, pretty calm, "Kind of short, Asian, hair all the way up, a lot of make up?" Alec chuckled. "You know him?" Maia shrugged, "He's sort of famous around bars." Alec frowned. "He's my friend." He confessed. "Keep your friends close." Maia said softly, "You will never know when you will need them." Alec shook his head. "But I barely know him and he probably thinks I am crazy." Maia looked on him longly. "Give him chance Alec. Maybe he's not who you think he is." Alec nodded for himself. "You're right." He said. "I will do."

After that they managed to close the bar again and headed towards Magnus' loft.

"He's gonna be so pissed." Alec dreaded. "He's gonna kick me out. I will have nowhere to stay. He's my only friend here." "Hey!" Maia shouted on him, "Okay. He's my first friend here." Alec corrected himself. "It's going to be just fine." Maia assured him.

When they knocked on the door, noone opened. "He's probably sleeping." Alec said. At that moment the door opened widely and when Alec saw Magnus he tried to leave the hallway.

"Hi Magnus," Maia greeted, "I brought you your friend back." Magnus frowned. "Alec?" He asked. "Yeah." Maia said as she looked to her left just to see Alec standing 3 metres away from them, hiding behind the plant. "Alec!" She sighed and walked to him. "Let's get you some rest, okay?" But he man refused. "He's upset with me." He said. "I am not!" Magnus shouted all the way from the door. "I just worried about you!" "See?" Maia dragged him back to the door.

"Where have you even been?" Magnus asked. Alec shot his gaze to Maia and leaned closer. "Don't tell him." He whispered, but loud enough so everyone heard him anyway. "Noone can know what happened. Please." Maia looked at him and back on Magnus. "We have been at bar, as you can see." Alec looked on Magnus as well and nodded. Maybe too much. His head shook and Alec stumbled.

"Okay." Magnus sighed, "Let's get you in bed." Alec looked on Maia. "Byeeee." He said happily and walked in the apartment, soon Magnus was closing the door and following him.

Alec sat on the couch and looked up on Magnus. "I am sorry." He whispered. Magnus sighed. "I am not angry Alexander, I just was worried about you." Alec nodded. "Where have you been running Alec? I looked everywhere. I even walked to the park..." Alec's eyes filled with tears as he remembered what almost happened there. He was never suicidal, but that evening... He didn't care what will happen. He didn't care about what could've happen. He just wanted to jump. To get out of there, and he nearly died. If it weren't for Maia. She understood. She trusted him. Even such a small acts of kindness suddenly meant so much.

"I was... I was so scared Magnus." Alec started, "I woke up and I was alone and I just..." He didn't know he was crying until Magnus wiped the tears away and embraced him in warming hug. "I'm sorry."

Magnus managed to persuade Alec to sleep in the bed and not on the couch. And when Alec asked him to stay, Magnus agreed.

 

~~~

 

Magnus woke up first in the morning, Alec still sleeping next to him.

He tried to get up from the bed, not to wake up the younger man and headed in the kitchen. As he was making the omelette he was thinking about yesterday night events. Alec wasn't telling him something. Something happened that night and Alec with Maia were the only one who knew what happened.

 

"Good morning." Alec whispered as he walked in the kitchen. "Morning." Magnus murmured as he continued eating his breakfast.

"Uhm, Magnus? Can we talk?" Alec asked as he walked to the table. Magnus put down the cutlery and sighed. "There's nothing to talk about Alexander." He looked at him. A lie. And Alec knew it. "Listen Magnus, I am sorry." He said, not breaking the eye contact. "I shouldn't have left like that and it was irresponsible from me." Magnus blinked few times. He did not expect that. "Yesterday when I was talking with Maia, she said some things that got me thinking." Alec continued. "You are my friend Magnus. My first friend I got here and you were here for me when I needed it." Magnus was honestly shocked. Surprised even. Alec was pretty straightforward. Not that he minded. "I don't want to loose it." Magnus forced a smile.

"Alexander," he started, "I know all this is confusing and I myself can't even imagine how weird it has to be for you, but... How about we just try it again?" He said and handed him hand. Alec stared at it for few seconds before understood what Magnus was implying. "Alec Lightwood." He said, shaking Magnus' hand. "Magnus Bane." He introduced himself. "Would you like some breakfast?" He offered and Alec nodded. "I'm starving." He chuckled nervously.

"You're not much a talker, are you?" Magnus teased Alec after while of silence. Alec looked up at him and shrugged. "More of thinker." He announced, but felt guilty about it. After all, Magnus offered him such a warming hospitality. "I have three siblings." He blurted out, trying to look as calm as he could. "I am the oldest, then is my sister Isabelle and youngest brother Max, but my parents also adopted Jace." Magnus was surprised. So Alec can talk when he wants to. Magnus smiled on him kindly, but didn't say anything. He wasn't sure what, giving him time to say something more.

"So... What kind of work allows you to buy such luxurious apartment?" Alec asked after while. Magnus smiled. "I help people," he said. "Like a doctor?" Alec tried. Magnus chuckled. "More or less. How about you?" He changed the topic. "I am-was a soldier." Alec said and Magnus stared at him. "As was my sister and step-brother." Magnus froze. He knew a soldier. A great one. How could he ever forget. After all what happened. Alec noticed Magnus' shock. "Are you okay? Magnus?" The older man blinked few times, all the memories coming back. "I wouldn't guess you as a soldier." He said, "War is cruel. For soldiers because they can die. For mothers because they don't know if their children are coming home. For lovers because they constantly worry about them." Magnus was quiet, sorting his thoughts. "Yeah. It was always hard, not knowing if I am ever going to see my family again..." Alec agreed quietly.

Before any of them could say anything, someone knocked on the door. Magnus looked up. "Speaking of friends," he smiled, "I want you to meet mine." He stood up from the table and went to open the door. "Cat! Ragnor!" He greeted the incoming. Alec stood up and walked to them. Magnus smiled at him. "Alexander, meet Catarina, my best friend and neighbour." "Cat." The woman introduced. "Alec." He said as he shook her hand. "And this is Ragnor. My oldest friend." Alec looked at him and smiled. "Nice to meet you." "Oh we have met before!" Ragnor smiled on him. Everyone except Ragnor frowned. Alec shook his head."I don't think so... I have been in city just few days." "We met yesterday in the park, you were the guy..." Alec froze, staring on Ragnor. Magnus frowned. What's going on? Ragnor was in the park as well? "Oh," Ragnor realized, "you don't remember me, do you?" Alec shook his head. Ragnor just chuckled and the group changed the conversation.

But Magnus couldn't tear his eyes away from Alec, who was now time from time looking on Ragnor. Magnus noticed that the younger man seemed tense. Nervous maybe. What happened in the park?

"Hey Alec," he heard Ragnor spoke to Alec, "do you mind asking me what happened? How you got here?" Alec sighed and looked down on his hands. "I'm sorry, I myself don't know what happened." "Just try." Ragnor said kindly, "We want to help you." "So you believe me then? That time travelling is real?" Ragnor chuckled. "We have more reason to trust you than others. If our magic is real... Why couldn't time travelling be as well?" Magnus sent Ragnor a death stare and Catarina did as well. Their magic abilities were something not worth talking about. It was dangerous. There were people out there who might try to use their powers against them. When Magnus looked on Alec, the man just frowned but apparently didn't pay any attention to it.

 

~~~

 

"A friend of mine died few hours before I came here," Alec started, he felt his hands shaking, tears coming to his eyes as he remembered the loss of his dear friend, "and when I was walking home, over the bridge,…'" he stuttered, remebering unpleasant memories, '"there was a car out of rails coming on me, and it pushed off the bridge." he paused for while, cleaning his mind. "The last thing I remember is falling in the cold water and the next thing was waking up, naked, in the river where I fell. In 1950." he said quickly, finishing the glass. He didn't dare to look up on Magnus, instead he looked on Catarina who offered him small smile.

"And so what year are you coming from?" she asked. "2018." "Oh." the friends gasped.

"Also, Magnus told me that you had some pretty bad bruises." Catarina said, Alec nodded. "It's not that bad." Alec said, as a soldier he was used to worse things than falling from bridge. "Nothing?!" Magnus gasped, "Alec your body is covered in purple bruises, that is not nothing." "Just let me check them." Catarina said. "Fine." Alec sighed and started pulling his t-shirt off.

"Oh wow." Catarina marveled, when Alec took his t-shirt off and exposed his muscled body covered in dark bruises. "Okay Alec, please lie on the couch," she ordered him and Alec did as he was told. "Okay, I need to leave." Magnus shouted after few seconds, storming out of the room. Alec looked up at him, but the other man was already gone, slamming the door behind himself. Ragnor frowned, following him.

"Is... Is he alright?" He asked Catarina. She didn't understand the question. "I mean," Alec leaned closer to Catarina, so he was now sitting in front of her. "I understand that this-" he pointed around himself, "this is not normal situation, and Magnus has been really helpful, and if there's something... I can't... I don't want to be burden to him." Catarina was looking at him, "I can find job and place to live if it's too much for Magnus." He stuttered. He wasn't lying. Hurting Magnus was the last thing he wanted to do. "Are you serious?" Catarina asked him, watching him closely. "Hurting Magnus is the last thing I want to do." He said truthfully. Catarina nodded.

"He trusts you." She said finally, "And I trust my friend." Alec smiled on her lightly. "Do you mean it? With the job and..." She asked him suddenly, standing up. "I don't know if I am stuck here forever, but I am not just going to sit here and hope that somehow I will go back to 2018." Alec said, "I am not going to sit here and feel bad for myself." "Okay," Catarina said, throwing him the t-shirt, "I'll ask around." "Thank you." Alec whispered.

"Seems you have your first friends in 1950." Magnus said as he walked back in the room and the group chuckled. "Anyone up for dinner?" He asked. "We can go to that Chinese restaurant." Cat offered. "Let's go." Ragnor said and the group soon left the apartment.

The food wasn't bad. Alec was actually surprised. He even managed to calm down and loosen a bit. Also he found out that Magnus' friends weren't bad company to have around. They told him some funny stories, which were even more fun, when Alec compared them to their (2018's) problems.

Catarina asked him many things about modern medicine and was glad to hear about some improvements, but unfortunately there were still diseases that couldn't be healed.

Ragnor was more of a tech guy. Hearing about phones and their possibilities, Alec was almost scared that he will faint because of the excitement.

Through the whole dinner Magnus was quiet, not talking, maybe even not listening. Lost far far away in his thoughts. Alec wondered what was going on in his head.

After the dinner Catarina took Magnus away and started talking with him about something, that Alec didn't understand. Ragnor used that chance and walked to Alec. "I was thinking." He said, "Maybe it's good idea if you write an diary... You know? Just write about your life and all the things that you think that are important, then we can try to work out what happened and maybe even why." Alec nodded. One thing was for sure, Ragnor wasn't idiot. A little fanatic maybe? But if anyone could help him, it was Ragnor. "Here," Ragnor suddenly searched for something in his small leather bag, after while finding it with a celebrating laugh, "take this," he handed him a red writing notebook, Alec had feeling he saw it before. "Thanks." Ragnor nodded. "And maybe one thing," he thought for second, "2018 isn't that far away, so maybe... Keep it little secret?" He offered, "there are people who might could use it against the time." That made sense. Alec nodded, taking the book in his hands. He really have seen that book before, but where? "Also here is my address, if anything, I mean anything, goes wrong, alright? You're always welcome." He handed Alec a small paper with an address. "Uhm, Ragnor?" Alec suddenly remembered something, "You... were in the park..." Ragnor nodded and sighed. "Don't worry, I am no going to tell anyone." "Thank you." "But, did you talk about it with someone?" Alec nodded.

"We good to go?" Magnus walked to them, looking at them with asking face. Ragnor petted Alec on the shoulder, "Yeah." He said, looking on Magnus, "Nice seeing you Alec," He said, "hope we meet again." And he was gone. Alec chuckled as he shook his head. "Bye Al!" Catarina called after him as Ragnor dragged her away, "Bye Cat!" He said goodbye, looked on Magnus and smiled.

Magnus forced smile back and Alec started walking home. Or he thought so. He haven't walked even 3 metres before he felt Magnus catching his arm and turning him around with shy smile. "It's this way Alexander." He said quietly and walked away, leaving Alec behind, knowing the younger man will follow him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really want Alec and Maia be friends, what do you think?


	3. Alec's diary part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I knew him my whole life, and yet I didn't know him at all.  
> (Alec writes his memories in his diary)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is just a shorter episode, oh wow already 3rd part I posted this week, ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ problem? I don't think so

_I was born as a first child, before my sister Isabelle and Max, later my family adopted Jace._

_My parents were busy people, working whole day, even taking their job back home, dinners were quiet as we were not to interrupt our parents. As the eldest son I felt responsible for taking care of my younger siblings. And so to keep them away from my parents anger we used to go to play outside. We had no garden so we used to sneak up on the garden next door. And here he was. Mr. Ba-Li. Our neighbour. He was an old man, who allowed us to continue sneaking into his gardens. And they were truly spectacular._

_He had a pond in middle of the garden, beautiful flowers growing around whole garden, birds chirping whole day and butterflies carefully flying around us. The garden was truly magical._

_I still vividly remember the first time we sneak in his gardens. Things were especially bad at home so I had Max in my arms and took Izzy's hand, Jace following us, we went outside and we saw a butterfly. He had beautiful red wings and sat on Izzy's shoulder. When we tried to observe him more detaily, he flew away. Straight in Mr. Ba-Li gardens. We were so amazed with his beauty that we followed that butterfly. Once we got in the bushes it seemed as if there was a small path for us. As if someone wanted us to go there. And we did. He welcomed us in his gardens, full of colours and life. All kind of animals were going to feed here, to rest here. Because no matter what or who, everyone was safe in these gardens. The gardens that were so carefully hidden from the outside world._

_First we were shy to talk to the old man, but quickly we understood that there was nothing to be afraid of. Since that day, anytime it was hard at home, we would've run in his gardens, to hide away. To hide before our own problems._

_Soon he started making us snacks and lemonade during warm days. When he did, we all would sit on the terrace of his house and listen to the stories he would tell us._

_He was like a grandfather we never had. Like a friend we all needed. And I more than anyone else._

_He would tell us fairy tales and stories about old ages. About war, about adventure, about love. He always made sure we were happy._

_In evenings when I was putting my siblings in bed I could see him from our window, sitting in an old chair, reading a red book. Sometimes he was smiling. Sometimes he was crying. I asked him many times what book it was, but he never told me._

_He was very secretively about his personal life. Changing the topic and pretending we never asked. But the more he refused to tell us, the more I was curious. I knew him my whole life, and yet I didn't know him at all._

_I never knew what happened in his life. What made him the person he was._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be more flashbacks, and as you probably guessed Lightwood parents aren't very nice in this one :// draaaama, I just can't resist drama... kill me please


	4. Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I am just scared Maia." "Of what?" Alec sighed and rolled his eyes. "I don't know. Of rejection? Of getting hurt? Of destroying friendship?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something is finally happening here yay!

When they returned from the dinner, Alec went to shower first. As he walked out and Magnus disappeared in the bathroom, Alec used his absence to take the blanket and pillow from the bedroom and moved onto the couch.

Of course, he could just sleep in the bed with Magnus another night, but he felt guilty about it. First, Magnus and he weren't that good friends. Second, Magnus seemed like he could use some space. And Alec understood. He was still just a stranger.

When Magnus finally came out of the shower, Alec was already lying on the couch, pretending to be asleep.

 

He woke up in the early morning, feeling more rested than in the few last days. He even didn't have any nightmare. He stood up from the bed and headed in the kitchen. He was starving, and he could do something nice for Magnus as well. When he opened the fridge he realized that Magnus must have enjoyed cooking, considering that the fridge was full of groceries. Alec chuckled for himself. He was so lucky that Magnus have found him that day. Such a lucky coincidence isn't it?  Or is it? Alec suddenly unsettled but quickly stopped the thoughts.

He decided to make pancakes. It was one of the foods he could make. As the eldest child, he cooked dinner for his siblings sometimes.

Just when he finished cooking and put the pancakes on the table together with some marmelade and sugar he found, Magnus woke up. The older man walked in the kitchen, smiling, "Do I smell pancakes?" He asked. Alec couldn't help but to chuckle. "Help yourself," he said, handing Magnus one of the plates he brought. Magnus accepted it with nod and sat.

"Mmh." Magnus moaned as he tasted the pancake. Alec laughed at Magnus, but was glad that he liked them. "Where did you learned to cook?" Magnus asked when managed to finish third pancake. "I used to cook for my siblings." Alec said, "My parents were busy so sometimes... They forgot to...eat." "Oh," Magnus put down the cutlery, "I am sorry... No children should have so much responsibility..." Alec shook his head. "It's okay." He said quietly, "It wasn't always that bad." Magnus smiled on him cheerfully. "So," he started, "I was thinking that in the process of us becoming friends we could go to the town, since you still haven't been there."

~~~

When Magnus offered Alec to go to the town, the younger man's face lightened up. "Okay." he agreed.

When they cleaned after breakfast, they headed outside. Magnus took his coat and looked on Alec. He frowned, his clothes were too small for Alec, they will need to go o the shop as well. "We have one more place to go first." He announced as he smirked on Alec and left. Alec followed him down in front of the building, where Magnus' red car was standing. "Let's go!" Magnus cheered. "Wow!" he heard Alec gasp. "That's yours?" Magnus laughed. "Yeah." he said, nodding. "That's so cool car." Alec chuckled. "I like it!" "Thanks. Come on, we have shopping to do." he smiled.

That's how Alec found himself standing in the small boutique where Magnus was choosing clothes for him. Alec himself wasn't a big fan of shopping but Magnus looked happy. He was literally running around the shop, looking for clothes for Alec. He was just standing there and looking around a little bit. Definitely different clothing style in 1950, he thought. Soon Magnus came back with arms full of clothes and clumsily handed them over to Alec. "Try these." He said and disappeared again. Alec looked on the clothes and sighed. He was never liked colours. Most of his wardrobe was usually just black.

"What's wrong Alexander?" Magnus asked as he suddenly appeared from behind him. Alec looked at him and on the clothes. "You don't like it?" Magnus asked with such disappointment in his voice that Alec suddenly felt bad about it. "Nothing." He said quickly, "I just... Don't like colours." He whispered shyly. Magnus chuckled at him. "Very well, I see." He said, taking the clothes away from Alec and disappeared again. When he came back again, he was holding clothes in dark shades. "Try these." He said kindly.

Alec sighed and nodded. Very well. Let's do this, he thought. He walked in the changing cabin and put off his t-shirt, trying one of the Magnus brought him. It was nice and fit him perfectly. Alec looked on the price tag and gasped. "Magnus!" He shouted from the changing cabin. The older man quickly rushed in there, opening the door. "What's wrong?" He asked, "what happened??" He said, being surprised by Alec having no t-shirt. "Magnus?" Alec called the other man when he saw that he was paying more attention to his bare chest than to him.  "Y-yeah?" The man mumbled, looking up, "what's wrong?" Alec knew that Magnus' gaze lowered again and so he put on a nearest t-shirt that was actually the one he came in. That gained him Magnus' full attention. "I can't buy these clothes." He said seriously. Magnus frowned. "Why not?" "I mean," Alec chuckled, giving Magnus one of the clothes, "have you seen the price??" Magnus was watching him with blank look. "What?" Alec asked, when Magnus laughed, "what's so funny?" But Magnus continued laughing. Maybe too loud. Alec put his hand over Magnus' mouth to silence him.

The older man stop laughing at the touch. Alec soon realized that Magnus may be not comfortable with the touch and quickly pulled his hand away stepping from Magnus. "Sorry." The other man mumbled, trying not to laugh anymore. "Alexander, price is the last of your problems." He said with smile, "I am paying for it." "But I can't let you spent so much money on me! You barely know me..." "Alexander." Magnus called him, "Alexander," he tried to calm him down. "It's okay, alright? I don't mind." Alec took deep breath, "Why are you doing this?" He asked. "I trust you." He whispered, "I don't know why, I just do." He said, looking straight in Alec's eyes. "Thank you." Alec whispered. And he meant it. Such a kindness was something Alec really needed right now. "Thank you." He whispered even more quietly, tears coming to his eyes. He turned away from Magnus in attempt to hide his tears from him. But the older man wasn't having it. "Oh Alexander." he whispered, taking his hand carefully and dragging him in hug. Alec didn't know what to say, so they were just hugging for few minutes before he finally dried his tears and pulled away from Magnus.

"How about you change your clothes and we get out of here? Hm?" Magnus offered and Alec nodded. Magnus took the clothes Alec tried and went to pay for them, resisting to tell Alec how much it cost. Both man then met in front of the shop, where Magnus put the bags in the trunk of he car. "Where do we go now?" Alec asked, partly scared, that Magnus will drag him to another shop.

"You will like it." Magnus only said and hinted Alec to sit in the car. They were driving for few minutes, as fast as the car could, which -for Alec- didn't seem very fast.

Alec couldn't help but to look on Magnus few times. Of course the city streets were nice as well, and everything seemed so funny, so... Old-fashioned. But Magnus, Alec liked him, he was good friend, and it was fun with him. That's what Alec needed. To loosen up a bit. Isabelle always told him that he was boring, that he couldn't have fun. But he did now. Everything felt like a dream. A long one. Like a holiday he never went on. And he enjoyed it.

And also, Magnus was here. Alec wasn't sure what their deal was. They probably were just friends, because Magnus probably even wasn't... Gay. And Alec knew it was bad idea to develop a crush on him but... He was so nice. Being with him was nice. Alec felt like he didn't had to worry about anything when he was with Magnus. He was like friend Alec never really had.

"We're here." Magnus announced as he drove the car on the parking lot. "Where are we exactly?" Alec asked, looking around. Magnus smiled proudly. "Welcome to the old city centre. I figured out that you don't exactly enjoy shopping, no matter how much it hurts me…" Alec started laughing. "You sound like Izzy." Magnus frowned. "Izzy?" "Isabelle, my sister." Alec explained. "Right. Sorry." Alec wasn't sure why Magnus was excusing, but it didn't matter. "I think you would get along very well." Alec thought aloud. Magnus raised his eyebrows. Alec pointed somewhere between his painted nails and make up. "She's a lot… like you." he smiled unsurely. Magnus understood Alec's hesitation and put his hand on Alec's shoulder. "I believe she is truly beautiful woman." Alec nodded. "She is."

"Let's go." Magnus said, getting out of the car. The city was even nicer during the day, Alec thought. The houses were small, set one by one, thin, squeezed. On the streets were crowds of people, street artists and many small coffee shops. Alec was amazed. Of course, it was so much less crowded than what Alec was used to, but it was beautiful in its own self. It was so.. Young… innocent. So free. Noone was in hurry. People were talking. No phones… "They are so happy…" Alec couldn't help but say in awe. Magnus looked at him with frown, but smiled.

 

~~~

 

Magnus always loved this city. There were shops, restaurants and many, truly many clubs, after all, he was owner of one (among other things), but then there was the old part of the city. Magnus always liked the small streets, which could be very hard to orientate in. But Magnus lived here for years by now, so getting lost in there wasn't an option. Anyway, it could be fun, to leave Alec in there. Magnus wondered how long it would take him to get back. He chuckled for himself. "What?" Alec asked, turning the gaze away from the streets back on Magnus. He looked so happy, walking in the streets of the old city. He even dragged him in few churches they found and Alec wanted to go on the view from the city tower. Magnus knew many hygge (comfortable) coffee shops and restaurants. There weren't even so much people and the price was fit the quality. In one of these restaurants Magnus dragged Alec. They both were quite tired after walking whole day, and Magnus could use some food as well.

"So, how do you like the city so far?" Magnus asked, when the waiter brought them the menu. Alec was glowing up. "It's amazing!" he said, "I never could imagine that it was once so small and quiet city." he suddenly stopped, "It's long time since I last saw people to be so… I don't know… free?" Magnus wasn't sure what Alec was talking about, but nodded anyway. "What would you like to eat?" he asked, changing the topic. "What do you suggest?" Alec asked with a smirk. Magnus smiled. "Depends what you like." he teased. "Choose for me, I trust you." Magnus chuckled. "Very well, Alexander. Game on."

Magnus ordered for both of them. When the waiter left, he looked on Alec. "What did you order me?" the younger man asked. Magnus chuckled. "You trust me, don't you?" Alec forced ironic smile. "Of course, _Magnus._ " he teased and suddenly Magnus stomach tickled. He knew that feeling. He felt it before, but there was something strange about it this time. This couldn't be happening. It's wrong. He took the glass of wine that was standing in front of him and finished it at one go. Alec laughed quietly. "Whoah, carefully here!" Magnus shook his head. "Don't worry, my resistance toward alcohol is huge." Alec raised his eyebrows. "I am a club owner after all!" Magnus said. "Wait, what?" Alec frowned, "you own a club?" Magnus chuckled. "I thought you were a doctor… kind of?" Magnus suddenly become serious, "Yeah. Kind of." Alec smiled on him. "Full of surprises aren't you?" At that moment the waiter brought them the food.

"What is this?" Alec chuckled, looking on his plate. Magnus frowned, "Oh my dear Alexander, have you never eat Lasagna?" The younger man shrugged, "Well, my family didn't go out on dinners, and as a soldier…" "Well," Magnus encouraged him, "try it." Alec put a piece on his fork and before Magnus could say anything he put it in his mouth. "Ahhhh." Magnus just heard Alec hissing with his mouth open. He couldn't help but to laugh.

"Seriously?" Alec asked him, when he managed to swallow the food. "You didn't tell me it's hot." At this moment Magnus was full on laughing. "It's not funny, I burned my tongue." But the older man couldn't stop. "Magnus," Alec called him, but he didn't hear him. Alec leaned closer to him, again silencing him with his hand. Luckily they were almost the only people in the coffee.

"Sorry," Magnus chuckled, trying to calm down, "I am so sorry." he laughed again. "It's not funny." Alec said, but a smile small smile was appearing on his lips. "I just, I just thought…" Magnus tried to talk, but couldn't catch his breath. "how the hell did humanity survive that long.." he laughed again and felt how Alec kicked him lightly under the table, "how did humanity survived that long until 2018, if you don't know how eat." Magnus couldn't stop laughing, no matter how he tried not to. "Oh come on Magnus!" Alec sighed. "I just didn't expect it to be so warm!" Magnus shook his head, again trying to calm down.  "I am hungry!" Alec excused. "I can't imagine how hungry you must be." Magnus teased. Alec rolled his eyes. He took Alec's hand in his on. "How do you eat in future then?" Magnus continued joking, "No warm food?" Alec sighed, pulling his hand away, "Not in army, no." he said as he took another piece of food, blowing it a little, so he could eat it without problem. Magnus shook his head, still smiling.

Being with Alec was somehow always easy. When they talked, it was like if they were in their small bubble, alone, and the whole world around them didn't matter at that moment.

He probably zoned out for a while. "What are you looking at?" Alec asked him. _You._ "Nothing." "What do you have?" Alec asked. Magnus looked down on his food. "Gnocchi di ricotta." he told him. "Do you want to try it?" Before Alec could answer and before Magnus could think about what he was doing, he was already handing the spoon torward Alec, feeding him. "Mhm. It's good." Alec said, wiping his mouth. "Wasn't it too warm?" Magnus couldn't help but to tease his friend. Right, friend. That's what they are. Alec frowned on him with smile and as he shook his head he throw a piece of bread at him. It hit Magnus on his chest. "Ouch." he fake whined, "You wound me Alexander." he chuckled. "The bread didn't deserve that." Alec chuckled. "You're drama queen."

For the rest of lunch-dinner they talked about all kind of things. It was easy with Alec. He didn't had to pretend. To be someone he wasn't. It was nice. Just nice.

"Should we go?" Alec asked when they finished their glasses. "Sure." Magnus answered, asking the waiter for a check.

"Where now?" Magnus asked, giving Alec chance to choose destination. "The city tower, is there good view?" "The best." Magnus said and led Alec the way.

As they were (finally) standing on the top, Magnus took deep breath. He wasn't used to walk so many steps. "Out of breath?" Alec teased. Magnus admired how rested Alec looked. "Soldier." He huffed. "Don't laugh, not everyone has your stamina." "Aww." Alec whined. "Stop it." Magnus warned. Alec laughed as he kneeled down to him. "Need help down here?" He joked. "Alexander I warn you, stop." He didn't actually mind, he knew Alec was just having fun, and seeing him smile... It was definitely worth it. "Or what? You will chase me?.... With your stamina?" And that was it. Magnus looked up on still smiling Alec. "How about last down is making breakfast tomorrow?" He challenged as he pushed Alec and started running toward the door. Fuck the view, this was way more fun.

Magnus heard Alec laugh behind him as the man stood up and started running. Magnus was running down, 2 steps at time, even thought knowing he had no chance against Alec. The younger man definitely had good stamina.

He was almost down all the stairs when Alec caught him and pinned him against the wall. He was breathing quickly, his eyes wide open. Magnus suddenly forgot how to breath. "Seems you are making breakfast tomorrow." Alec teased him. Magnus looked down on the rest of the stairs and back on Alec. "The fight is not over yet." He said, kissing Alec quickly on the lips and using the distraction to escape from Alec's embrace, running down the rest of the stairs.

As he ran down, and so won the bet, he realized what he had done. He kissed Alexander. He. Kissed. Alec. Magnus was breathing quickly, turning around, fearing the moment Alec comes. Shit. This was not happening. The younger man did really come out few seconds after him, but didn't look as shocked as Magnus expected. He was… smiling? "You cheated!" he said with laugh. "Don't you think there will be revenge." he joked, still smiling. Magnus was confused. So he was not angry? But…? "Magnus?" he heard Alec call him, "Sorry what?" he looked at him. "I asked what you like." "What I like?" Magnus was even more confused now. "For breakfast Magnus!" Alec chuckled. "Even thought you cheated, I am going to make the breakfast tomorrow." Oh… right… the bet. "Surprise me." he said with frown and walked to the car.

 

~~~

 

When they sat in the car, it was silent road. Magnus kissed him, Alec thought, maybe it was just a peck, but it happened. Magnus probably was thinking about it as well, because he was also quiet, and considering how much he was frowning, it was not a good thing.

Right before Magnus parked the car, Alec spoke up. "Do you know where Maia lives… or works?" he said, carefully looking on him, "I thought I would just go say thanks…" Magnus didn't look back, focusing on the parking. "Hunter's Moon," he just replied, "That's the bar." he specified, getting out of the car, heading toward the house.

Alec felt bad about leaving Magnus behind after… whatever was going on between them.

"Hey Magnus?" Alec called after him, "is everything okay?" He asked him. Magnus looked at him tiredly. "I'm fine Alec." He lied, "just long day." Alec figured out his lie, but hasn't said anything and just gave him space, walking in any direction he thought the bar was.

"Go left and third street to the right." he heard Magnus shout after him. He smiled, but didn't say anything, keeping walking.

In the end he managed to find the bar. He took deep breath before coming in.

"Alec!" Maia greeted him as soon as he entered the bar. "Hi." he greeted her shyly. "What are you doing here? Bad day?" she asked carefully and Alec had to smile. "No," he shook his head, "I just wanted to say thank you… so thank you, Maia." The woman smiled at him. "So.. You want to talk about it?" "About what?" Maia raised her eyebrows. "I am a bartender Alec, I know when people have problems." Alec forced a smile. "I really came here to say thank you." Maia nodded. "You welcome," she said, "you know what? Give me 15 minutes, I will be off then, ok?" Alec nodded. Maia put a glass of beer in front of him, "It's on the house."

Maia wasn't lying, in 15 minutes she put off her apron and sat next to Alec. "So, spill it." she said as she sipped out of her glass. "Feelings." Alec chuckled sarcastically. "Care to share?" Maia encouraged him. "I have feelings… that are not acceptable in these years." Maia frowned. "It's just confusing…" Maia understandingly nodded. "How's Magnus doing?" she changed the topic. Alec sighed. "It's alright. I met his friends, also we went shopping today, it was boring." Maia laughed. "Not shopping person then?" Alec chuckled shaking his head. "But yeah, it's going fine. He is a good friend." Only a friend, there will never be nothing more. "Alec," Maia sighed, "you can always tell me everything okay?" Alec smiled on her. "I am just scared Maia." "Of what?" Alec sighed and rolled his eyes. "I don't know. Of rejection? Of getting hurt? Of destroying friendship?" "I see." Maia sighed. Alec looked around, making sure noone's listening to them.

"I am homosexual, Maia, gay, whatever you call it now." "And you like Magnus." Maia added. Alec nodded. "I'm fucked up." he sighed. "And I am scared that when people find out, they will hate me, or be scared of me, because I am different. Because I am bad person. Sick even they can say…" "No," Maia put hand on his arm, "you're not Alec. I know that we are living in time of homophobes and selfishness. But don't let it change you Alec, there are already people like you. Maybe not Magnus, but you will find someone, I promise." Alec felt tears in his eyes. "You have friends here Alec, you have me, and I don't think you're sick. So you like boys and so what Alec? It doesn't make you bad person." She wiped his tear away. "You are not alone, okay?" "Okay." Alec whispered hugging her.

"Tell me more about your new friends?" Maia asked. "Are you jealous?" Alec teased. The woman looked at him, raising he eyebrows. "You wish Lightwood." "They are nice. I am really lucky to meet you all… it's strange…" "What is?" Alec frowned. "First I thought I was sent here as a punishment, and everything what happened so far seems like the best that could happen to me." Maia chuckled.

"Can I ask you something about 2018?" Maia asked. Alec finished the beer. "Sure." "What is 2018 like? What do you miss?" Alec thought about it for a while. "Everything is much faster. When you want to talk to someone, you just take phone and call them or text them. Cars are so much faster. I think people are not happy anymore... They are just running their whole lives..." He paused. "I never really had friends, because I was like the other people, just running... But being here, it made me think. What is your life... I feel like it is a beautiful dream and sometimes I wish I would never woke up." Maia nodded understandingly. "But there are things I miss. I miss my small sister. My family. All the good books that are still not written." He chuckled. "I miss Izzy. Talking to her... When I was in war and they would separate us, I used to write her letters. I never knew if I will see her again or if she will ever read them... But it helped you know?" Alec looked on Maia. "So write her one." She offered. "I will." She smiled on him.

"When we are here... There's something I could ask you," he paused, last chance to change his mind, but no. He needs to do it. "Do you know about some cheap place I could live?"

 

~~~

 

Magnus was drowned in his thoughts since Alec left.

When Alec asked him why he was helping him, Magnus hadn't had the answer himself. After all, Alec was just a stranger who claimed he came from future and everything in his brain shouted to get him real help, but his heart told him not to. He had this feelings inside him that told him, not to give up on him. Everything Alec said, done or explained… Magnus trusted him. Even thought Catarina and Ragnor didn't  first believe him, he just couldn't explain the feeling. And don't let him even get started on Alec's muscled body.

But Magnus couldn't go there. Not again. Not after all that happened- Not after his mother- He couldn't-

Being with Alec was so easy. He could joke, tease, flirt. Because Alec didn't judge. Magnus felt so happy being with Alec, being himself, being so free. When he was with Alec, he didn't care about world. He just enjoyed the other man's company. But after all, Magnus couldn't go back to that horrible place again. He couldn't take all the pain again. All the remorse. That place was living hell and he simply couldn't.

And today... When he kissed him. Was he angry on him? Was he running to Maia? It was wrong thing to do and he knew it. He didn't deserve nice things. He never did.

He felt so ashamed. He didn't even dare to tell Alec. He knew that if someone could help him, it was Alec. But Magnus needed more time. He needed to make sure that he wasn't going to leave him as well. That he wasn't going to use it against him. He needs time. And who knows? Maybe time is the only thing he doesn't have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLease don't hate me, I promise they'll talk about it! :))


	5. Move in with me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was a mistake. These words were haunting Magnus since the moment he spoke them. He could see the hurt in Alec's eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo there's another Chapter, hope you like it :)

_"You know, you could actually move in with me."_ Alec was in kitchen making breakfast as he promised. But his mind was in yesterday talk with Maia. " _I am looking for roommate, and you do as well, you can work nights in the bar if you'd like." she offered_. Alec went for French toasts. _"It is not far from here, so you can still go visit your friends whenever you feel like." Alec was out of words. "Why are you doing this Maia, not that I am grateful, but.." Maia sighed._

_"I told you I know what it feels like… to be alone, not knowing what to do.. I was there Alec." she paused, "My family never cared about me, and I was young and stupid… I got in really bad place." she looked on him, looking for any reaction, "And if it weren't for Luke, I wouldn't be here now. He gave me place to live, he found me this job… and thanks to him I decided to help people, like you, so they don't have to go through it alone."_

_"Was that the reason why you were in the park…?" Maia didn't say anything for while. "I was standing there few years ago." she started and Alec's heart started beating faster, "I was standing there and Luke stopped me, and since then… I just go back from time to time to remind myself that world is good place. That I can make it through. But that I can escape away from it when I need." Alec smiled on her._

_"So I am not saying to move in with me for real, but if you just need to escape, my place is available." "Thank you." Alec whispered, hugging her tightly, "And I am sorry."_

_"We will be okay." he heard Maia whisper. "Yeah, we will." he agreed._

He was nearly done when someone knocked. Alec put the pan away from the stove so it wouldn't burn and went to open the door.

"Oh, Good morning Cat." He greeted the woman, "Good morning Alec." She smiled at him. "Is everything alright? I can get Magnus, but he's still sleeping." "Actually no, I came to you." Alec frowned. Catarina pointed inside. "Can I?" "Of course!" Alec excused, "Where are my manners," he laughed, "come in."

"Sooo," Catarina started as they sat, "I asked around and tried to found you some job." Alec raised his eyebrows. "Really?" Catarina nodded. "It's not much, but the pay is alright and mainly- it's a police job so I hope you won't be bored." Alec chuckled. "You're amazing Catarina!" He said, hugging her. "Thank you." The woman smiled at him. "Of course Alec, that's what friends are for." She stood up. "How about we get dressed and I will introduce you?" Alec nodded, "I would love that." "Okay, meet me in one hour?" Alec agreed as he closed the door behind her.

"Was I still dreaming or did I heard Catarina?" Magnus suddenly appeared behind him. "Good morning Magnus," Alec smiled, little nervous how things are between them since yesterday "it was indeed Catarina. Hungry?" He said as he walked back in the kitchen. "Why so happy?" Magnus couldn't help but to ask. "She found me a job." Alec boasted. Magnus frowned. "Oh really? Where?" "At the police."

Alec was happy. First, he had job. Second, it was still something he was familiar with. After all, he started working as policeman before, but didn't find it satisfying so changed to the army, and soon his siblings followed. "That's nice." Magnus murmured. "Here," Alec handed him the toasts, "I have made you the breakfast." He tried to cheer Magnus up. Was he still thinking about yesterday events?

When the older man sat and started eating Alec couldn't hold it anymore. "Listen Magnus," he said as he stood next to him, the older man wasn't looking at him, "about yesterday... It's..." Magnus looked up at him, _it's okay Magnus,_ Alec wanted to say, but Magnus interrupted him. "You're right," he sighed, "I am sorry Alec, I shouldn't have done that it was a mistake and I am sorry." Alec frowned. He didn't want to say that, but Magnus was pretty clear. It was a mistake. Of course. Magnus would never like him. Alec felt the tears coming to his eyes. His voice betrayed him so he just nodded and left to change his clothes.

When he came out already in new clothes, Magnus was just cleaning the dishes. "I am leaving, bye!" Alec just called on him and left, he didn't wait for the answer. Catarina was already waiting for him. "Ready to go?" Alec forced a smile.

When they entered the police station, Alec was in an awe. It was just as in the movies. There were desks and men sitting behind them. Writing some papers and in the back were secretaries typing on the old big typewriters. Random people running around, deliver messages, people shouting out their underneath mates. From time to time some of the constables brought a robber or some other delinquents. Alec must have zone out because Catarina had to hit him few times to bring him back.

"Ready to meet my friend?" Alec nodded. "This is amazing." Catarina chuckled. "Oh there he is!" Catarina smiled. "Luke!" She greeted, "Nice to see you again." The man smiled on her and looked on Alec, "You must be Alec then." Alec shook his hand. "Nice to meet you sir." "Oh please call me Luke." Alec nodded, frowning. Could it be _the_ Luke Maia talked about?

"Very well Cat, if you excuse us, I will go show our boy around." He hugged her and asked Alec to follow him.

Luke showed him around, explaining what where is, how it works on the district. Soon he led Alec to his desk and handed him papers.

"Take day two before you go out in action with me alright?" Luke offered and Alec nodded with smile. "Actually can I ask you something?" Alec called after him, before he could leave. "Sure." "Do you," he started, "do you by any chance know Maia?" he asked. Luke frowned. "I do, she is like my daughter, how do you know her?" Alec sighed, "We met in a park and got talking." It wasn't completely lie, was it? Luke nodded. "How small the world is, right?" he chuckled and left Alec to his job.

This life was new beginning. Alec liked it. He finally got rid of his demons and could be new person. Better person.

In the evening when he was done he walked back to the apartment but Magnus wasn't home. And Alec hadn't have had the key. He sighed and looked on his (Magnus') watch. If Magnus owns a club, he's not going to be home whole night probably.

Alec headed to Hunter's Moon, hoping to find Maia there. She was there. "Hi!" she greeted him with huge smile, already pouring him a beer. "Hi." Alec greeted her as he sat. "How was first day at job?" she asked excitedly. "It was really nice, I actually am working with your friend Luke." he said, proud of himself, "I figured." she said. Suddenly Alec frowned. "How do you even know I was there?" he asked, "I am pretty sure I didn't tell you… yet." Maia chuckled.

"Magnus stopped by." Alec almost choked on his drink. "Magnus was here?" "Easy there," the woman smiled at him, "Just wanted to talk, no harm done, Alec… he cares about you as well." Alec chuckled. "Why do you think so?" "Well, I think he gave me the hurt-him-I-will-hurt-you talk." Alec was staring on her and started laughing, Maia joining him. "I don't believe you." Alec said when he calmed down. "He did, and oh!" Maia suddenly remembered, "He's coming late tonight, he has some work in his bar, so he said he would just pick you up hear." She teased. "Seriously?" Alec shouted, "What am I? Some child?" Maia laughed and shrugged. "If you want, you can meanwhile help me here." Alec pointed behind the bar. "You mean… there?" "You need to pay for all those beers somehow." she joked. "Okay." After all, he had nothing better to do.

 

~~~

 

_It was a mistake._ These words were haunting Magnus since the moment he spoke them. He could see the hurt in Alec's eyes. He hated hurting Alec, but he needed to do this for both of them. He needed to broke Alec's heart, so he wouldn't get his broken. It was unfair but Magnus was too scared to let Alec in. After all that happened to him, this was the best for him. To make sure they were only friends.

When Alec was leaving he sounded so sad, that Magnus actually felt bad, but then he remembered why he was doing it and pushed his thoughts away.

He nearly forgot about Ragnor coming over for lunch. To plan their trip to Europe. Ragnor came with his arms full of papers. He wanted to see everything while they were there. "So let's have last checks on this trip alright?" he asked as he opened the map of Europe. Magnus sighed as he walked to the table looking on the map.

"We sail in London, than Paris, Madrid, Milano, Rome, Zurych, Wienna, Zagreb, Budapest, Prague, Krakow, Stockholm, Copenhagen, Berlin, Hague and back from London home." Ragnor listed all the cities they were to visit during three months. "I am so excited!" he chuckled, Magnus couldn't help but to sigh. He needs to make things right with Alec. And he needs to tell him he's leaving.

"What does Alec think about it?" Ragnor asked him. Magnus looked on him and frowned. "You didn't… Magnus!" Ragnor shouted on him, "You have to tell him he will be alone here!" "He will not," Magnus hissed, "Catarina is not coming with us either and he has a new friend anyway." Ragnor frowned. "Is there any way, you are jealous of that _new friend_?" he teased but Magnus just growled, pushing Ragnor from the flat. "You have to tell him!" he heard Ragnor to shout from behind the door. "I will!" he shouted back before angrily falling on the bed.

He should headed to the bar soon, Pandemonium won't open itself. Ugh, he thought, and Alec doesn't have a key. Magnus sighed, it seems he has one more place to go.

"Hello Roberts." he greeted the woman as he entered Hunter's Moon. "Oh Magnus, hi." Maia seemed surprised to see him, after all, he had his own club so why to go to another one? "How can I help you?" Magnus forced smile. "Just came to talk, would you believe it?" Maia laughed. "No, but since it's you I guess it has what to do with Alec…" she raised her eyebrows. Magnus nodded.

"He's a good man Maia," he started, "so.. If you hurt him, I hurt you." he said, "I am gonna be honest with you." Maia smiled. "That seems fair, I know what he sees in you." she said, "Don't worry Magnus, I am not going to hurt him, he's my friend." Magnus frowned. "I was his friend first." he warned. "Jealous?" she teased him as he was leaving.

"Oh by the way," he turned around right before leaving, "can you tell him to wait here for me? I'll be in the bar…" Maia nodded. "Thanks." Magnus whispered and he was gone.

 

When he later came back in the bar, he was surprised to see Alec behind the bar, pouring drinks and chatting with people and Maia. The woman just leaned closer to him and told him something that made Alec laugh. He looked so happy, standing there, talking to the people. Magnus almost didn't want to walk to them, to destroy such a good mood, but before he could turn around, Alec's eyes found him. He stopped laughing and instead smiled at him kindly. Magnus took deep breath and forced himself to go to the bar. "Hello there." he greeted, not quite sure why he was feeling so nervous. "Hi." Alec said, "Do you want something to drink?" he offered unsurely. Magnus shook his head. "How about we go back to the apartment?" he said and Alec nodded. "Okay." The younger man agreed. He put down his apron and leaned to Maia to tell her something. The woman smiled at him saying something nodding, Alec then kissed her cheek and turned back to Magnus, who was already leaving. It was not jealousy. It was not.

 

The drive was quiet. Magnus knew things between them were somehow awkward and he also knew he had to talk to Alec. That they had to clear things between them before he leaves. One last talk and they will be again friends and so they will stay. Magnus swallowed nervously. It was just talk, why was he then so scared? Why did he felt like it was a mistake?

 

As they entered the apartment Magnus hanged his coat and took deep breath. _He has to tell Alec about the Europe trip with Ragnor._ When he turned around Alec was already standing next to the table, looking on the plans of the trip. _Or not._

"You're leaving?" Alec asked, and gosh, he sounded so sad. "Alexa-" Magnus tried but he didn't know what to say, "Why didn't you tell me?" Alec said, "When did you planned to tell me? The day you would leave? Would you even tell me at all?" He raised his voice slightly. "I wanted to tell you!" Magnus interrupted him, "It just never seemed as good time to do so." Alec shook his head as he walked around the table but didn't say anything.

Magnus suddenly felt the anger in himself. Why isn't Alec upset? Why doesn't he say anything.

"You don't tell me everything as well." He said seriously. Alec frowned looking at him. "What are you talking about Magnus?" "The park!" Magnus spat out. "Maia knows. Ragnor knows. Everyone except me knows what happened there!" He didn't even notice he was shouting. "I thought we were friends! And friends talk to each other!" "You're the one who's avoiding me!" Alec shouted. "Magnus I didn't tell you about it because I don't want you to worry!" Alec defended himself. "I could say the same about the trip." "But it's not the same Magnus!" "Why?!"

"Because I didn't want to hurt your feelings. Because I am scared to loose you!" Alec shouted and him and became quiet immediately. Magnus was breathing heavily.

"Feelings?" Magnus spat out. "You are talking here about feelings?!" He mocked. "I like you Magnus, okay?" Alec shouted with tears in his eyes. "And it fucking hurts because I know you will never like me because it's not going to work out. Because you're living in this homophobic society. Because you probably don't even know what you want!"

"Alexander!" Magnus had enough. "You don't understand a shit you're talking about." He shouted back. "I fucked up okay? I shouldn't have kissed you and it was wrong and whatever you think you feel. It's not real!" _It's not real._ Magnus could still hear the words coming out of his mother's mouth. _It's not real. You're just confused._

"You're just confused. And I can't go back there!" He felt tears coming from his eyes. "Part of me died there Alexander and you don't deserve that. Noone does." "Are you even listening to me Magnus?" Alec was frustrated. "I know you feel the same as I do. It's not wrong Magnus!" He shouted with sadness in his voice. He walked to him and cupped Magnus' face in his hands. "There's nothing wrong with you Magnus." He said, tears falling from his eyes. But Magnus knew Alec was wrong. "You're perfect Magnus. For me you are." Alec said, crying and embraced Magnus in tight hug.

Magnus shook his head. He's not perfect. He's sick. He needs to get away. He can't be with Alec. He never could. He doesn't deserve nice things. He pulled away from Alec, crying as well. "Please Magnus," the younger man whined, "don't push me away." But Magnus shook his head. "I can't... We can't..." His voice betrayed him. "Magnus... No we can do it... Please." He pleaded. "I know you're scared but we will make it together." It didn't mean anything because Magnus was already decided. "I don't like you Alexander," he said with hard heart, but it was the best solution for them, "I am sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but there never was anything." He turned around. So Alec wouldn't see his tears. "It was just fun."

"Magnus..." Alec tried again, "I don't know what you have been through but we can make it work. Please... Just don't push me away." Magnus turned around. "We are friends Alec!" He shouted, "And nothing more!" The words hit Alec. He was just standing there, tears falling from his eyes.

Magnus shook his head and walked out on the balcony.

Soon he heard Alec walking around the room and when he finally looked back, Alec was standing behind him, he noticed the bag in his hand.

He wasn't crying anymore, his face was blank. "I was there, in the park, where you found me, I tried to jump" he said coldly, "...I saw your name carved there Magnus." Magnus opened his mouth few times but nothing came out. "I just didn't want to open old wounds. Whatever you have been planning there to do Magnus, you can just tell me. I just want to help you." Magnus just shook his head. "You can't understand." "You didn't even give me chance!" Alec was desperate. "Just let someone help you. Please talk to anyone. Just... You don't have to do it alone." Before Magnus could say anything, Alec was gone.

 

~~~

 

Alec knocked on the door. "Hey," he greeted the woman, "do you still have the free room?" He asked. Maia nodded at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all you kudos and comments, it's nice to know someone reads it :D


	6. Alec's diary part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I had a choice to make that day. Either I would stay home and go on more treatments. Or I would leave and never come back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys here I am back! I hope you enjoy the next chapter :) please leave your comments and kudos, it means a lot!

_When I first realized that I might not be like other boys, that I have feelings to other boys instead of girls, Mr. Ba-Li was the first one whom I ran to._

_Not to my parents. They were too busy working._

_Not to Izzy. She was too young to understand._

_Not to Jace. He was the one I loved._

_I couldn't have been more than 15. My parents were gone for whole weekend and I had to look after my siblings._

_Of course we spent whole weekend in the garden of Mr. Ba-Li. And it was him, who noticed my strange behaviour._

_When my siblings were outside running and playing, he sat next to me and asked me what was wrong._

_And I told him. Because he was my best friend. I told him how I feel about boys. How I feel about Jace, who was my step brother._

_But he didn't judge me. He assured me that there was nothing wrong with me. That there's no shame in being different._

_I trusted him. Noone told me anything else, then why shouldn't I?_

_I had no idea at that time, how cruel the world could be._

_About three years later my parents found out. They found out that I had feelings towards boys. And it wasn't good._

_Suddenly they showed some interest in me. Normally I would have been happy. But the only interest they showed was to make me "normal" again._

_They sent me to psychiatrist who was supposed to talk me out of it. They kept telling me how wrong it was. To feel what I feel._

_I spent days in the small white room surrounded by 4 plain walls. They were trying to break me, but they never could._

_Every time I came back home, every time when Izzy asked me if I was okay, I pretended to be alright. To be good. But inside I was still loving boys._

_The only person except my parents who knew what was going on was Mr. Ba-Li. He became my closest friend. First I couldn't even talk about the terrors I have had experienced in the hospital. I would just wake up in nights, unable to calm down. I used to think that I was sick. That I was a bad person. That I couldn't have nice things. But slowly, slowly I started telling Mr. Ba-Li everything._

_He would always carefully and patiently listen to me. And when I was done, or couldn't speak anymore, he just hugged me and told me that everything was going to be okay. He would explain to me that there was nothing wrong with me. That I wasn't sick or bad person. And it took me long time before I started believing him._

_We agreed that I should tell at least Isabelle what is going on. I was scared. That she would hate me as well, but Mr. Ba-Li promised me that she would love me anyway. And she did. She was furious when she found out, but we made her promise not to tell anyone._

_Both of them were there for me, and both of them helped me to accept that I wasn't bad nor sick person._

_At that time I was still working as a policeman. It has been few months since my last hospital visit, but still I was sometimes waking up in the nights._

_I figured that as long as I was living under the roof with my parents I could never accept myself._

_That's why I went to army. They say that everyone who went in army was running before something. I was running there to find myself._

_I told my parents that I was still same, that their treatments were not working. They were furious. They wanted to sent me back to hospital but I told them that I was leaving to army. I had a choice to make that day._

_Either I would stay home and go on more treatments._

_Or I would leave and never come back._

_I left._

_Soon my sister and Jace followed me. We were good team. Three go in, three go back._

_Being in army, I met many people who were like me. Many people who were also running before something._

_My new friends showed me, that there was truly nothing wrong with me and helped me accept myself._

_But still I remembered nights I spent with Mr. Ba-Li, when we were talking. When we discussed things concerning my feelings. I wrote him letters. Every time I had a free moment, I wrote him. It wasn't always just plain news, sometimes I wrote him about my feelings. About my thoughts. Because he understood._

_I even found my first boyfriend here. It was hard in the beginnings. I was scared. I tried pushing him away, but he didn't leave. Every time I pushed him away, he would come back, stronger, loving more than last time. He never gave up on me and showed me how it feels to be loved. And to love._

_They say love comes when you expect it the least._

_They also say that you never get as much time with the ones you love as you wish you had._

_He died. Soon after we started officially dating. It wasn't easy. I tried to close inside myself, thinking I would never love again. I felt like I disappeared because he wasn't looking at me. I felt invisible, because he couldn't see me._

_But someone saw me. Izzy. I don't know what I would have done without her. She is the one person who saves me over and over. Whenever I have problem she is the one I am always running to._

_There's something stronger than love. Family._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will get better I promise! :))) please leave comment what you think and kudos, love y'all *flies away*


	7. Please don't leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus knew Alec was watching him. He could feel his gaze on him. This was bad idea. It wasn't fair to him. Or Alec. But Magnus didn't care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I was sooo excited to write this chapter!! Hope you enjoy it as I did :) Please let me know in comments what you think about the story so far! :)

Alec stormed out of the apartment, crying. He walked out of the building and sat on the stairs. He started sobbing uncontrollably. He was sitting there for few minutes, hoping that Magnus will come out, looking for him, so they can talk but the older man never came out.

He stood up and headed to Maia's apartment. "What happened?" she asked, immediately poring him a drink. Alec shook his head, drying his tears. "I am just trying to help him Maia.I told him what I feel and he told me it was mistake and I can't breath, Maia I can''t. I feel." he cried. "Alec," she whispered, "slow down, I can't understand you."

Alec took deep breath. His hands were shaking. "We argued." he started."I… I uh actually told him that I like him." "Oh." Maia gasped. "I guess it didn't went good?" Alec sighed. "Maia I know he feels what I feel, I just want to explain to him that it's okay." he stuttered, "That there's nothing wrong with him for liking boys… That I am here for him… but he just… he didn't even try…" he started crying again. "I fucked up Maia. I broke our friendship."

Maia hugged him tightly. "You'll get through it." she whispered, kissing him in the hair. "You'll talk it out."

Alec managed to get some sleep and when he woke up he headed to the job. Maia was still sleeping and Alec didn't want to wake her up. He took some bread as breakfast and headed on the police station. Trying not to think about his argue with Magnus, he dove in the papers and Luke actually came to make sure he is okay. Alec nodded, telling him he just needs to work and so Luke let him.

When he finished at the police station he headed to the Hunter's Moon, where he already found Maia working behind the bar. He immediately offered to help her. The more busy he was, the better for him.

He went to bed extremely tired and didn't even had chance to think about the other man. Luckily.

And that was how it went for the few next days, working whole day, soon Luke started taking him out on the patrols, so he actually got in some action but there wasn't much of it, in 1950 and that small city… but Alec was glad. Luke was good partner.

And then on Sunday Catarina came to Hunter's Moon. Alec felt nervous suddenly. He found out that she just came to invite him on Magnus' farewell party.

Of course. He completely forgot about Magnus' three-month-long-trip to Europe, and of course it had to be Catarina who had to invite him.

"I don't think he wants me there." he said quietly. "Nonsense." Catarina smiled on him kindly. "Why wouldn't he?" Alec shrugged. "Maybe because it's you who's inviting me?" Catarina sighed. "Come on Alec," she chuckled, "Magnus is stubborn okay? Trust me, he will be happy to see you. He misses you, you know?"

"Fine!" Alec agreed because he knew he had no other chance. It was Catarina after all.

 

~~~

 

"You what?" Magnus shouted on Catarina. "You invited Alec?" Catarina frowned. "Magnus, he just moved out, it doesn't mean you're not friends anymore." She argued. "This is your farewell party Magnus, he will miss you." Magnus sighed. He didn't tell her about their fight. And that they haven't spoken since.

That doesn't mean that Magnus haven't been thinking about him. He was. A lot. More than he would like. He knew it wasn't fair what he said. Especially after Alec tried so much to be there for him. But if he hated him now, he had all the rights to so.

Magnus hated himself. Anyway he's leaving for three months to Europe, until then things will surely change. He will get over Alexander and things will be good again. Maybe Alec will move on as well?

It didn't take long and Alec came. Magnus saw him immediately. Not that it was hard, to miss tall dark haired stranger. Magnus sighed and looked away, quickly finishing the drink standing before him.

 

Magnus knew Alec was watching him. He could feel his gaze on him. This was bad idea. It wasn't fair to him. Or Alec. But Magnus didn't care.

He turned the girl around, so she was now facing him. _Don't do it._ He could hear Alec begging, or could he? It didn't really matter. Without further thinking he leaned in and kissed her.

He didn't have to look on Alec. He knew the other man was watching him.

He looked up anyway. Their eyes met, and if Magnus was imagining that he was kissing Alec instead of that woman, noone has to know.

Alec was staring at him with blank expression, his hand clutching the glass. His fingers white because of the pressure he was putting in the grip.

The glass broke.

Alec cut off the stare and looked down on his hand. The glass cut his palm, the red blood streaming down. Drops falling on the ground. Alec didn't looked up again on Magnus. He left. Ignoring Catarina handing him the paper towels. He left the room, without looking back.

And something in Magnus broke up. He didn't deserve that.

Magnus pulled away from the woman, following Alec.

He found him standing in the empty bathroom, looking for paper towels to dry the blood. As he heard Magnus to close the door behind him, he looked up.

Hazel eyes meeting the brown ones.

The younger man suddenly stopped moving, silently watching Magnus. "Alexander, I am sor-" But before Magnus could finish his sentence he felt Alec's lips on his own, being pushed against the nearest wall.

It was hungrily kiss. Desperate even. Alec pressed against Magnus, kissing him eagerly. And Magnus couldn't think. He didn't care about the world around them. Right now, right there was standing Alec, kissing him. And so without any hesitation Magnus kissed him back.

Alec took Magnus' face in his hands, dragging him closer. It was overwhelming. Magnus couldn't breathe, wanting to get closer to Alec. He wasn't sure how long they were there, how long they were kissing, but he didn't mind. As long as he was with Alexander, nothing else really mattered.

Suddenly Alec pulled away from Magnus, not saying anything. Magnus whined at the loss of the closeness, but didn't say anything, too overwhelmed to talk. Alec's thumb brushed over Magnus' lips. Magnus could feel the warmth of Alec's blood on his skin.

 Something in Alec broke, the spark in his eyes dissapeared, being replaced with sadness, Alec shook his head, moving away from Magnus, leaving the bathroom in hurry.   

As the doors closed with a thump Magnus gasped after air. Like he could breathe again. What did just happen? Alexander kissed him. He kissed Alexander.

The whole world was spinning. He walked drunkly torward the sink and leaned on it, breathing deeply. The doors opened and some man entered, weirdly looking on him, quickly dissapearing in the toilet booth. Magnus frowned for himself looking up in the mirror.

There was blood on his cheek. On his lips. Everywhere where Alec touched him. Magnus felt the tears coming in his eyes. He left. Alec kissed him and left. He is not coming back.

Magnus reached out for the paper towels and wet them, washing his face.

 

~~~

 

Alec knew it was bad idea to go to the bar that night. But he just wanted to see Magnus one more time. One more time before he left to Europe.

He thought that maybe they could be friends again, but Magnus barely looked at him, avoiding him at all cost. Alec ignored all the women Magnus kept close to him. His anger was consuming him and Alec just kept silencing it by drinking more drinks. Magnus tried to upset him. He knew, but it wasn't going to be that easy.

At one point of the evening Magnus took one of the girls on the dance floor. And Alec couldn't tear his eyes away. Magnus was beautiful standing there. Dancing.

Then he kissed the woman, while looking on Alec. And suddenly it was too much. Alec didn't even notice breaking the glass until Catarina tried to hand him paper towels, cleaning the broken glass under him.

It was too much.

He left them behind and walked in the bathroom trying to calm down. Magnus had no idea what it did to him. Standing there, so hot. So beautiful. But he would never be his. Magnus could never love Alec. He made that clear.

He hoped for but also feared of Magnus following him in the bathroom. The doors closed and Alec looked up. Magnus.

His breath quickened. The man was standing there. In front of him. Looking so beautiful. "Alexander," he started, and Alec couldn't stand the distance between them. He needed to be closer. He needed to feel Magnus' warmth. "I am sor-" And he pressed against Magnus, kissing him hungrily, pressing him against the nearest wall. To his surprise Magnus kissed him back. They were making out against the wall for few minutes, both of them trying to get closer to the other man. To get as much as they could.

But… Magnus could never love Alec, he wasn't… He coudln't do this to him. He deserved to be happy with someone. And that someone coudln't be Alec. Not in 1950.

Alec pulled away, breathing deeply. Magnus looked so beautiful, standing there, pinned to the wall under him. It was for Magnus' own good. He was right. They couldn't be together. And so he ran away from the bathroom, leaving breathless Magnus behind.

 

He walked outside on the fresh air, trying to catch his breath. Not quite sure where he was walking, he ended up  standing in front of Hunter's Moon. He didn't notice Maia running to him. "Are you okay?" she asked him. Alec looked at her with tears in his eyes. "I fucked up Maia." he said, "He's going to hate me forever." he cried as she held him.

"Oh!" Maia gasped as she saw Alec's cut hand, "and this?" she frowned. "A broken glass." Alec explained shortly.

"Come on." Maia said as she took Alec inside the building and sat him to the bar. "I'll find you some bandage." Alec nodded, drying his tears. "Thanks." He whispered as she handed him a glass of beer.

When she cleaned his wound and binded his hand, she sat next to him and looked at him, asking for more. For explanation.

"I kissed him." He confessed, "I just wanted to see him one more time before he left. And he was..." He took deep breath, taking a sip from the glass, "I felt like he was teasing me the whole night. He was ignoring me, couldn't even look at me, but he kept all these woman close to him... and it drove me crazy Maia." He said looking at her, "He kissed one of them while he was looking at me and I lost it." He looked down on his hand. "So I left in the bathroom and he followed me. I couldn't... I kissed him and he kissed me, and I just realized... that he probably will never love  me so I just left..." Alec looked up on Maia, shame in his eyes. "He's gonna hate me, isn't he?" He asked. "I ruined our friendship."

Maia sighed. "Oh Alec," she shook her head, "you stupid idiot. He kissed you back and you think he doesn't care about you?" "But-" "No but Alec," Maia interrupted him, "you two need to talk." Alec sighed. "You're right," he said, "as always."

"What if he's still angry on me?" Alec worried. "Talk. To. Him." Maia insisted. "I am scared." "Everyone is." Maia smiled at him. "Go."

Alec ran the whole way back to Magnus' place, but it was too late. Magnus has left.

He's gonna hate him. He ruined their friendship.

 

He sat next to the door, leaning his head back on the wall. Suddenly the door in front of him opened and Cat came out from the room. "Alec?!" She asked, "you idiot what are you doing here?" Alec looked up on her. "He's gone, isn't he?" He asked quietly. Catarina nodded. "Fuck." Alec whispered, hiding his head between his legs. He was too late. Magnus is never gonna forgive him. He stood up quickly, walking around the hally breathing quickly. Why was he so stupid?

"Alec, calm down." He heard Catarina, "come in, I will get you something to drink, okay?" Alec looked at her again, tears in his eyes. Without further convincing he entered the flat. He shouldn't have done that. As soon as he sat, Catarina was standing in front of him. "What the hell Alec?!" She shouted on him, "Do you care to explain what have you done to Magnus?" She demanded. "He came to me totally wrecked. Asking if you were gone." "Catarina I am sorry." Alec said. "He is my friend Alec, and if you hurt him, you hurt me."  "And you think it doesn't hurt me?" He raised his voice, "Watching Magnus with all those woman knowing he will never love me?"

Shit. Catarina didn't know about him being gay.

But Catarina surprisingly didn't say anything just raising her eyebrows. "Are you sure about that?" She asked him. "I kissed him." Alec whispered, drying his tears quickly. "I kissed him and I didn't care what he wanted." Catarina shook her head. "You both are idiots." She said finally. "I know him for years and Magnus Bane never does anything he doesn't want to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am horrible person I know, and I am sorry! Do you like the story so far? Leave a kudos if you do ;) or comment :))


	8. Dear Isabelle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My dear Izzy,  
> This is my first letter for you. Please don't worry about me. I am fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! Alec writes letter for Izzy, aww siblings love

_My dear Izzy,_

_This is my first letter for you. Please don't worry about me. I am fine._

_It has been few days since I am here. Would you believe it? I somehow got in 1950 and it seems I am stuck in here now._

_In the beginning I thought that it was a punishment for me. That the universe was punishing me for all the evil I have done. For all the people I killed. I thought so. But now I am not so sure anymore. It feels like a dream. A good one. It's like holiday I never had. Now I understand why you always took days off with your friends. After so long time I feel so happy again, oh Izzy, I don't remember the last time I've been feeling so free._

_Of course, in the beginning it wasn't easy, I was confused, I was lost, but a man found me. His name is Magnus and I hope I can say we have become friends. He gave me bed to sleep in and food to eat. I've already met his friends. Catarina and Ragnor. Ragnor is actually cool guy, he told me to write a diary, and that he will help me to find a way back. Back to you. But sometimes I wish I would never come back. Don't get me wrong Izzy, I miss you, but life here? It's something I never thought I could have. So far far away from my problems. Here I had a chance to start new life. I am not sad anymore. But I miss them Izzy, do they miss me as well? Are they worried about me, or am I noone to them? There are many things I think about now, many things I regret not doing, so many things I never ended up the right way._

_I never made things right with them. I never talked to Max, I never told him how proud of him I am. I never went to his grave. I never told you enough time how much I love you._

_You probably wonder how is it like to live in 1950. It's amazing. Noone is in hurry, people are still talking to each other, there are men with newspapers everywhere. People are still polite to each other and not corrupted by fear. Even thought a Second World War just ended here, people here are still so optimistic, so happy, so free._

_And if you saw the city. It's beautiful. There are many shops around, but there is also the old part of the city, which is more beautiful than I remember. There are also not that many people so the whole place seems more peaceful. And of course everything is old-fashioned, at least for us. And as you maybe already guessed, yes, there are my favourites kind of cars! Magnus even has one of them. Oh Izzy, it's like my child dream came true._

_But not everything here is easy. I have done something I am not proud of. One night I went in the park and I tried to jump. I just wanted to jump back in our time, I wasn't even thinking what could've happen if it didn't work. I could've die. I could've been paralyzed. But I didn't care at that moment Izzy, I am ashamed to say so, but I was ready to die._

_I've had met one woman that night. Her name is Maia and she helped me a lot. I think she's my best friend here. No matter what I say, she's here for me. She has a lot of good ideas. She's a good friend. She knows about me and she accepted me, what more can I ask for?_

_And Magnus, I believe you would like him. You two seem to have a lot in common. For start, you both enjoy shopping. That's right, he took me shopping, and no, don't worry, he wasn't much more succesful than you were the one time we went shopping. He is funny person and I believe he enjoys being in the centre of attention, like someone else I know, right? Being with him is so easy Isabelle, but I am so scared that I will ruin it. You are right, I indeed like him Izzy, and I don't know what to do. I didn't even get chance to talk to him and I already think I ruined it Izzy. People in 1950 aren't as open minded as they are in 2018. I was scared, that if he finds out, he will despise me. And he does now. I wish you could be here and help me. What should I do Izzy?_

_The way we left things, I am so angry on myself. I should've fight harder for him. And now he's gone. For three months. A lot of things can happen during few weeks. Maybe when he comes back, he won't love me anymore. Maybe he will move on. I don't think I can bear that thought. That I will be still there, still loving him and he won't see me. I am scared of him not seeing me. I am scared every time he's not looking on me, I am scared that the moment he stops loving me I will disappear._

_But Catarina says it will be okay, and I have no other choice than to believe her._

_Catarina is a nurse and Magnus' closest friend probably, she is a nice woman, she actually agreed to help me find a job. I am working as a policeman, that's ironic don't you think? That the job I was running away from I now welcome with open arms.  And asked Maia for help to find a place to live and I have a new roommate now. I think you would like her as well._

_As I said, I am starting new life here, and honestly I am excited._

_Soon I will write you another letter,_

_Until then,_

_Love your Alec_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just finished writing another chapter for this story and honestly I am so excited!!! I really hope you will like it :) Stay tuned!


	9. Meet my fiancee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The man was pretty short, dark hair, face with Latino shapes. He also had some bruises on his face and was bleeding a little bit.  
> The man knocked on Magnus' door, falling on the floor. "Please Magnus help me." Alec heard the man to whisper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is going to be some angst so brace yourselves, also Magnus is not much in this chapter, but he's coming back from Europe soon!

Magnus was gone for three months. And a lot of things can happen in three months. In the beginning Alec was just walking around as a body without a soul, working as much as he could. On one side it actually helped him, he earned pretty much money, so he could already pay the rent and some other things.

On the other side, Maia was worried about him. Alec moved in with her and few times per week went on lunch with Catarina. Both women were somehow aware of Alec's relationship with Magnus, but neither of them pushed him to talk about it. And he was glad. He just needed some time.

It has already been two weeks and noone had heard from Magnus yet. Alec himself was slowly starting to feel better. He stopped working so much and actually started having some free time. He used it to meet the city and it's residents.

 

Alec was sitting in the office, writing in the red book, he was done with signing papers and wasn't ready to go back to Hunter's Moon. The rain was beating in the windows, so hard that it silenced the noise of the city. Alec heard someone walking up the stairs. He looked on the watch and frowned. It was late for other policemen to be still on the station, who else could it be?

The man walked up and looked on Alec. "Alexander Lightwood?" he asked. Alec's heart started beating fast. Who was the man? How does he know his name? Alec nodded. "That's me." he chuckled nervously. The man walked over to him and waved with something in his hand. He looked tired. "Here." he said as he threw something on the desk and walked away. "Have a nice day." he said leaving.

It was a postcard. He was a postman.

Alec carefully lifted it. Looking on the picture he saw the Big Ben tower. It was from London. _Magnus._ He realized immediately. He turned the postcard around. It was blank. The only thing written there was his name and an address. It was definitely from Magnus.

Alec felt the tears coming from his eyes. He remembered him. He was thinking about him. Alec smiled, putting the postcard on the desk. Magnus hasn't give up on them yet.

Maybe they still could figure it out.

 

He was smiling for the rest of the evening. He closed the red book and headed to Hunter's Moon. "Hi!" He greeted happily Maia who was pouring drinks behind the bar. "Who are you and what have you done to Alec?" Maia joked. Alec grinned on her. "I just need to write a letter." He said as he took the keys from Maia and went to their apartment to get some paper and an envelope.

 

As he was sitting there, he smiled for himself. Love makes you do strange things. He took the pen and started writing. When he was done he closed the envelope and put it in the pocket of his coat, walking to Magnus place, to put it in his apartment.

And that's how it was. Every week or so another blank postcard came. Whereupon Alec wrote him a short letter. He knew that Magnus wouldn't read them, because he wasn't there, so the earliest he could actually read them would be after coming back. In less than two months... But it didn't matter. At least it eased his mind.

 

When he was walking another night to Magnus' flat to throw another answer/letter in, someone stumbled in the hall, Alec was just leaving but look back to see where the man was going. Magnus' flat.

The man was pretty short, dark hair, face with Latino shapes. He also had some bruises on his face and was bleeding a little bit.

The man knocked on Magnus' door, falling on the floor. "Please Magnus help me." Alec heard the man to whisper.

"Hey," Alec walked back to him, "are you okay, what's wrong? Magnus' not here." The man was looking on him, crying, "I need help." Alec helped him to stand. "Catarina!" He shouted, slowly dragging the stranger to her door, which opened. "Alec! Raphael!" Catarina gasped as she saw them, opening the door widely for them. "Raphael what happened?" She asked him. Alec sat him on the couch in Catarina's room. "Hey, hey! Raphael. Talk to me, what's wrong?" Catarina slapped him lightly to keep him awake.

"Cat?" Alec suddenly heard quiet voice from behind himself. He turned around. "Madzie." He whispered, "Everything is okay. Just go back to sleep okay?" The small girl was looking at him. "Is Raphael okay? Where is Rosa?" Alec frowned looking back on Catarina.

"Raphael! Where's Rosa??" She shouted on him. Alec took Madzie and took her back to her room. "Stay here, Cat will come soon, alright?" The girl nodded. "Don't worry it'll be alright." He reassured her as he was leaving the room, closing door behind him.

"Who's Rosa?" Alec asked as he walked back to them. Raphael looked at him with desperate in his eyes. "My small sister." He opened his eyes. "She's still there! Oh my god!" He started breathing quickly. "He took her and locked her in the room! I couldn't get her..." "Hey, hey breath with me Raphael." Catarina tried to calm him down. "She will be okay." Raphael was shaking. "I couldn't help her." He whispered.

"I will get her." Alec suddenly heard himself say. Both of them looked at him. Catarina shook her head immediately. "You can't, it's not safe." "I was a soldier. I am a cop Cat." Alec argued, "I have more chance than you two." Raphael was looking on him. "Just tell me where you live." He asked him. "Alec don't." But the young man wasn't listening to her. He had to help Rosa.

After while Raphael told him the address and Alec went there, on his way stopping in the kitchen and just for sure taking a knife with him.

When he finally found the address and Raphael's house he took deep breath, his hand with knife hidden behind his back. He knocked on the door.

And old and evidently drunk man opened him. "Hm?" He growled on him. Alec showed him his police badge. "Officer Lightwood, the neighbors were complaining about the noise." He said, trying to sound serious. The man frowned. "I need to come in sir." Alec announced as he was already entering the house. He looked around. It was mess everywhere. A horrible place to grow up. He looked back on the man. "Where is your daughter, sir?" He asked. The man closed the main door. "She's sleeping officer." A lie. Alec knew it was a lie, but pretended not to notice. He only slowly walked closer to the man.

"I know when people are lying Mr. Santiago." He said calmly. "I'll give you one more chance to answer me before I actually threaten you." The old man laughed. "Threaten me boy? You are nothin-" before he could finish his sentence, Alec pushed him against the wall the knife pressed against the old's men neck. "I'll ask one more time, Where. Is. Your. Daughter?" The man whimpered under the pressure. "Locked. In the bathroom."

Alec pushed him on the floor, going to the only close door he saw. It was indeed closed. Alec noticed the key laying on the table. He took it and unlocked the door.

There was a small girl sitting there in corner, hiding, sniffling quietly, she had same black hair as a Raphael and big sad eyes, all red from crying. "Hey it's okay Rosa." Alec whispered, "I am Alec a friend of Raphael." He said, coming closer to her. "Let's go to him, okay?"

The girl looked at him with big sad eyes. "Please help me." She whispered. Alec smiled on her kindly. "I'll. Let's go to Raphael okay?" He said, taking her in his arms.

"Don't you ever hurt your children!" He threatened the old man, "Or I will make sure you get locked." And he was gone.

 

When Catarina opened the door, she chuckled with relief. "Rosa!" Alec hear Raphael shout happily. The young girl ran to him. "Raph!" She cried hugging him. "Thank you." Raphael whispered looking on Alec. "Thank you." Alec only nodded smiling on them.

"They need some place to stay." Alec realized. "It's okay," Cat assured him, "they can stay here as long as they need." Alec nodded. "I'll come to check on you tomorrow then?" He offered. "Thank you Alec." Catarina said, hugging him. "Raphael is like family... So thanks." Alec nodded. "Of course." "Do you need some other help here?" Catarina shook her head.

"Did it… did it happen before?" he asked unsurely. Catarina looked at him and back on the siblings. "It did, but it never became that bad." Alec sighed. "I'll talk to Luke and see what we can do." Catarina nodded. "I am going to check on you all tomorrow okay?" he smiled on her and left.

When he came back to the apartment, he was so tired that he fell asleep without even changing his clothes.

 

Something poked him. Alec opened his eyes and groaned. "Morning sleepyhead." He heard Maia chuckle. He looked up on her. "What?" he growled, his face falling back on pillow. "Sooo," Maia sat on the bed next to Alec, "is there something I need to know?" Alec didn't even bother to look on her. "Whatareyoutalkingabout?" he murmured in the pillow. "I can't understand you."

Alec looked up again. "What are you talking about?" he repeated his question. "Well… you came back later than I did… so I wondered what have you been doing?" she raised her eyebrows, "…or whom?" she joked and Alec threw a pillow on her.

"Nothing." he said, "I am just tired." Maia threw him the pillow back. "I am not leaving until you tell me where have you been Lightwood." Alec sighed as he sat on the bed.

"I was visiting Catarina and some friend of hers and Magnus' came, looking so devastated and he told us that he was a victim of domestic violence and his small sister was still in the house so I went to get her." he finished the story, "That's why I came late."

"Oh." Maia wasn't smiling anymore. "And the parents?" she asked. "Drunk assholes. I warned them." Maia nodded. "Maybe you should talk to Luke about it." Alec thought about it. It wasn't bad idea. "I am planning to." he said, as he slowly got up from the bed.

After he got dressed he said bye to Maia and left to work.

 

"Morning Luke," Alec greeted, lightly knocking on the door of Luke's office doors, "can I talk to you for a minute?" he asked. The man looked up on him. "Oh hello Alec, of course, take a seat, is everything okay?"

Alec sat on the chair in front of Luke's desk. "I was a witness of a domestic violence, Luke, and I wanted to know if there's anything we can do to help my friends." Luke frowned. "Of course, of course we can, but it is not our department who deals with domestic violence." Alec wanted to say something, but Luke interrupted him.

"I will tell my friend about it, and he will take a look at it. What's their name?" "Santiago." Alec said. "Okay, I will tell him Alec, now get back to work, alright?" Alec nodded. "Thank you Luke." "It's our job." the older man smiled at him as he left the office, Alec followed him.

 

He worked until the evening and managed to forget about Raphael and Rosa for while. Just before he wanted to leave, Luke found him.

"Hey Alec, sorry do you have sec before you leave." Alec looked on him and the other man who was with him. "Sure Luke." Luke nodded, looking on the other man. "This is Alec Lightwood, Alec Alaric Rodriguez, my friend from domestic violence department." he introduced the man. They shook hands.

"I am here because of the Santiago case." the man- Alaric announced. "It's not the first time we were warned about them, but the siblings never come to us. We can't help them, if we don't have proof of the violence or at least some testimony…" Alec nodded. "I want to help." "Then tell them that we need them." Alec nodded. "I will do." "Okay, I am glad I can count on you. Let me know when you have some news." "Will do." Alec said and headed over to Catarina's.

 

"Hey!" Catarina greeted him when she opened the door. "Hi." Alec said with smile as he lifted his hand with some food in it. "I brought something small to eat." Catarina chuckled. "You're so sweet. I understand what Magnus sees in you." she said before she could stop herself. Alec's heart itched, but he didn't say anything.

Just as he put the bag on the table he heard screaming. "Aaaaleeeec!" the small girls were running to him and both of them hanged on each of Alec's legs, hugging it tightly. Alec chuckled. "Hi Madzie, hi Rosa." he greeted them, stroking their hair carefully. Both girls giggled.

"How do you feel?" he asked them, "Goooood." Madzie smiled on him. Rosa was still a little shier than Madzie. "I am okay." the younger girl whispered. "Okay, who's hungry?" Alec announced and both girls started shouting. Alec chuckled and turned to the table.

"So I have some cakes, croissant, sweet bread…" "Cake! Cake! Cake!" the small girls were chanting. Catarina laughed as she brought the plates and forks.

When the girls started eating, Alec excused and went to talk to Raphael.

The man was lying in the bed, most of the bruises were cleaned but he still looked tired. "Hi Raphael." He greeeted him. The man smiled. "Alec, my saviour." he chuckled. "How do you feel?" Alec asked, standing next to the bed. Raphael looked down on his body and shrugged. "It kind of hurts, but it's alright. At least Rosa is alright now. Than-" "I swear to god, if you say thank you one more time." Alec chuckled. "I did what I had to Raphael, it's okay." The younger man just nodded.

"But there's something you can do for me." Alec said carefully, waiting for Raphael's reaction. "Sure, whatever is in my power." Alec nodded slowly, "I need you to write a testimony against your parents."

"I can't do that!" Raphael suddenly shouted. Alec frowned. "Raphael if you don't do it, they will continue hurting you." "I can't Alec, you don't understand," Alec was quiet, giving him time to say what he needed, "I am not 18 yet, they will sent us to orphanage and eventually split us… I can't I promised Rosa to never leave her." Alec sighed. Of course. "So I can't do what you're asking me. Not until I am 18, so I can make sure that Rosa will stay with me."

Alec nodded. "I understand Raphael, I can talk to my friend, we can make sure you will stay together." Raphael shook his head. "Magnus told me the same but you can't. You can't obey law." "I am policeman Raphael, it's worth a try." he tried to persuade the man.

"I can't loose her Alec, you don't know the feeling, the fear of loosing someone." "I do." Alec whispered. "I know how it feels Raphael and if I could change time, I would fight harder for my brother. I would never let him stay with my parents." he confessed. "I am sorry." Raphael frowned. "I promise you Raphael that I won't let anyone to split you two, okay?" The man looked up on him. "Think about what horrible things they will do if you don't leave now. They will hurt Rosa, and you can't do nothing to stop them, I beg you Raphael. Do it. For Rosa."

"Write the testimony, and I will do everything I can, so you will stay together, deal?" Raphael was thinking abou it for while. "But if somethi-" "I promise Raphael, Rosa will stay with you." Alec interrupted him before he could say more.

"It seems we have a deal." Raphael said quietly.

 

Raphael wrote the testimony. Alec took it to Alistair and both man started the case. It wasn't going to be easy, and the fact that both Santiago parents were drunk most of the time wasn't helping.

But eventually they got them to the court. Until then Raphael and Rosa were living with Catarina. Alec agreed to come everyday to check on them and to tell them the news about the case.

Rosa and Alec eventually became friends as well. Alec took the girls few times on the police station or in the park, just so Catarina with Raphael had some free time.

And Magnus was coming back home soon.

 

"Alec!" Madzie shouted on him. He looked around and saw the small girl playing with flowers, Rosa was sitting next to her, watching her friend as she was braiding a small flower wreath. Just when Madzie finished it, she carefully put it on Rosa's head.

"You're a princess now." she chuckled. Rosa was smiling shyly and looked on Alec. "You look beautiful, my princess." he smiled as he bowed in front of her.

"Oh Alec." Madzie laughed when she looked at him. "Your wreath is sooooo bad." Alec chuckled.  "I never learned how to do them." "Come on I will show you." the small girl said when she dragged him down between the flowers.

When they were walking back to the apartment, all of them head a beautiful wreath on their heads (All of them made by Madzie because to be honest, because Alec still does not understand how to do them).

They were just chuckling to something Madzie said, when Alec suddenly froze. The door to Catarina's loft was open, the woman was standing in between and in front of her was standing some woman, Ragnor and… Magnus.

Alec stopped breathing at the moment Magnus looked at him. He was still so beautiful. Maybe even more before he left.

When Magnus smiled at him, Alec thought he's going to faint. Right there, in the hallway. "Magnus!" the girls shouted and ran to him. Alec slowly walked to the group.

"Hi." he greeted Ragnor hugging him. "How was Europe?" he asked and Ragnor smiled widely. "It was awesome." Before Alec could avoid Magnus or do anything awkward, the older man walked to him.

"Hi Alec," he greeted him nervously, "long time no see." he whispered. Alec just nodded. Suddenly the woman walked to them and smiled on Alec widely. "HI!" she greeted him with incredibly annoying voice. Alec hated her already. "Oh, Camille, this is Alec," Alec forced a smile, "Alec this is Camille, my fiancee."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry okay? I promise they are going to talk soon!!  
> Your thoughts on the story so far?


	10. Alec's diary part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After I moved out and started working in police, things got worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another part of Alec's diary

_After I moved out and started working in police, things got worse._

_Our parents were still working most of the time and without me in the household my siblings became even more desperate._

_My siblings couldn't move in with me until they were legally adult, that meant few more months. For Jace it was just five more months to go. And he even wasn't the main target of our parents anger._

_And for Isabelle it was year. In an year she could get out of the house as well. She didn't take it very well, she used to stay nights at mine, but it wasn't helping either. It made thing even worse._

_When she finally turned 18 and moved, things finally got a bit better for her._

_That left Max alone. Of course our youngest brother was spending a lot of time at my flat as well, but our parents suddenly started paying more attention to him._

_Firstly we thought that it's good thing. That at least one of us will be loved by our parents. That Max can get the childhood he deserved._

_We all thought for long time, that things were going good. Max started spending more time at home and so we all were happy._

_Our parents even invited us all for family dinner as a celebration, because Max got accepted on one of the most precious gymnasiums in the city._

_That night things didn't went as well as we hoped for._

_That night I argued with my parents and left. After that I lost all contact with them. I left my job as a police officer and joined the army._

_Few weeks later I left in war, somewhere in Europe. When I came back, I finally noticed something was wrong._

_I hate myself for not seeing it before. To not noticing all the warning signs. That I did not hear Max calling for my help._

_When I came back from the war, I went to see him. My small brother._

_He was so slim, so thin. Of course my parents forgot again, to eat. To take care of Max. He was just a child at that time._

_Of course when I asked Max if everything was alright he would just nod and smile. I should have seen it before. I should have noticed it before._

_It took me a long time and a lot of persuading, before Max finally revealed the truth._

_My parents were pushing him to be the best of their children. To fix all the mistakes we have done. They raised him to their view of perfect child._

_They forced him to learn all days, to excel at school and punished him at every, even a little failure._

_No food or no free time, if he failed._

_They also threatened him to disinherit us. And Max who loved as all, and cared for us, did what they wanted, protecting us as he could._

_When we found out what happened, we sued our parents, we fought to get Max in our custody, but our parents were well known lawyers so we stood no chance._

_The only thing we managed was getting Max on weekends. Since then, we always made sure, one of us was there for him, some weekends when we were not there, he would stay with Mr. Ba-Li, but as long as he wasn't alone with our parents, we celebrated._

_We wanted to gave him back his childhood, the one he deserved._

_And Max was the whole time so brave. He never complained._

_If I could go back, I would tell him how proud of him I am. I would tell him how much sorry I am that we didn't fight harder for him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned! Next chapter R O C K S !


	11. What happened in Europe?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Tell me you don't miss talking to me and I am gone." Magnus said and honestly, Alec did not expect that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii, this chapter is focused on what happened while Magnus and Ragnor were in Europe, enjoy :)

Magnus was back. Magnus was engaged.

Alec suddenly couldn't breath. He couldn't pay attention to anything that was happening around him. He felt Magnus looking at him. He heard Ragnor talking on him. But he didn't understand. The group entered Catarina's apartment. Everyone except Alec, who was still standing in the hall.

Catarina walked over to him, touching his arm carefully. Alec looked up on her, tears in his eyes. "Alec…" she whispered. "I have… um, I have to go." he stuttered and walked away, tears falling from his eyes.

 

He walked in the park and sat on the bench.

He wasn't quite sure what he was doing. He just needed some place to be alone.

Magnus was back and he was engaged. So Alec probably lost his chance. He destroyed everything.

It was already dark outside and he lamp were shinning a light light. Alec was still sitting there, his thoughts far far away. He wasn't feeling sad. He wasn't feeling cold. Nothing. He was empty.

Suddenly someone sat next to him. He looked around and saw Maia watching him carefully. She didn't say anything, she didn't have to- there was nothing that could have been told to easen Alec's feelings- instead she offered him hug.

Alec accepted the hug, finally melting in the touch. Something in him broke. All the feelings he had suppressed suddenly came out. He started crying, embraced in Maia's warm hug.

They were sitting there for few minutes until Alec calmed down and pulled away from Maia. "Here," she said, pulling the blanket over them, "it gets cold." she smiled on him kindly. It was quiet again, but Alec didn't mind, Maia's presence was good enough.

"How did you find me?" he asked eventually not tearing his eyes away from the stars. Maia looked down on him, "Catarina sent me a note. I am sorry." Alec nodded. "You don't have to be, I am fine." he said. "You're not. You just spent last few minutes crying." she chuckled. "What if I just miss 2018?" Alec tried. "It's okay Alec, to have feelings." she started, "You are allowed to be sad." Alec smiled on her sadly. "Thank you Maia." the woman hugged him shortly. "You are not alone, remember?" Alec nodded.

"It's just so… unexpected." he said quietly, "I finally saw him after three months and here he is. With a fiancee." Maia sighed, petting his shoulder. "But still… we can still be friends right…?" "Sure you will be." She reassured him.

 

They were sitting there until the early morning and Alec didn't even get home and went straight to work.

"Oh wow," Luke greeted him, "you look horrible." Alec looked on him with tired eyes. "Thanks." he just proceed to say before he left to the kitchen to make some srong coffee. Luke followed him, "So I have been talking with some of our victims and we actually got lead." Luke announced. "Okay," Alec sighed, "just let me finish this," he said, holding up his coffee, "and we can go." "Hey, are you okay?" Luke asked him, "You were so interested in this case and now..." "Feelings." Alec just said as he poured himself another coffee.

"I'll be in the interrogation room." Luke announced. "Come when you ready." Alec nodded and quickly finished the coffee and made third one, walking into the interrogation room. "Let's get started."

 

~~~

 

Magnus loved Europe. It was beautiful place. Not like America. Every country was so different.

Every country had its own history. Culture. Language.

Magnus' was in love with Europe. And Alec.... Wait what?!

Magnus tried really hard to get over Alec, but it wasn't easy, especially because they just kissed. Again. And when he knew how it feels to properly kiss Alec, how was he supposed to get over him?

But he had three months. Alec probably hates him and will get over him soon. Maybe Magnus should as well.

When they arrived in London, Magnus was breathless. It was beautiful city. The river was blue and it immediately reminded him of Alec. He went to first souvenir shop and bought him a postcard. He wrote Alexander's name and then he remembered that he doesn't know his new address. He wrote the one on police station. It will do.

When he was looking on the blank postcard he realized he didn't know what to write. He spent whole evening thinking what he should write.

 

~~Dear Alexander.~~

~~Dear Alec.~~

~~How are you?~~

~~I miss you.~~

~~Do you miss me?~~

~~Are you waiting for me?~~

~~Please wait for me.~~

 

In the end he gave up and sent him a blank postcard. He will understand.

 

After London they went to Paris. And gosh, how much Magnus wished that he was there with Alexander. He found there another postcard with an Eiffel tower, again blank. He wasn't sure why he didn't write anything, but it could be their game.

 

They drove to Madrid. It was so warm in there and Ragnor took him out in some bars but Magnus couldn't forget Alec. The next day he found him a postcard with a lighthouse and a blue sky behind it. Like Alec's eyes.

He always found a postcard with colour of Alec's eyes. It was a way for him not to forget him. To not forget those eyes that enchanted him the first time he saw them. Not that he could.

 

The next stop was Milano, Italy. They have been sailing on the gondolas and enjoying the view and few days later they were in Rome. Magnus found it rather annoying since he wasn't exactly believer. He found a beautiful postcard of the Colosseum with a Moon behind it.

 

It was month later in Zurich, Switzerland when he met her for the first time. Camille. They have been wandering with Ragnor in the streets of the city. Magnus kept telling him that they were lost, but his friend continued persuading him to not give up. That's how they met Camille. She was another American who got lost in the streets. Together they managed to find the way out.

Of course Magnus didn't forget to sent Alec a postcard.

 

Camille decided to travel with them and Magnus didn't mind, nor did Ragnor. Their next stop was Wienna.

As both friends found out, Camille loved to party. Magnus couldn't complain, there was something about the woman that incredibly fascinated him on her. And when they were out partying, where Camille tried to kiss him after few drinks, he didn't pull away. He kissed her back.

After all, he may be normal. He can make it. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he anyway found a postcard for Alec. It was a nice ritual, he wanted to keep it. He owed Alec at least something. And he missed his eyes.

 

When the trio reached Zagreb, Magnus already accepted, that Camille has feelings towards him. He bought another postcard and when Camille asked him for whom it is, he hide it away from her and never answered her question.

 

In Budapest he asked Camille to be his girlfriend, she accepted. He was more careful when sending the postcard to Alec. He didn't want Camille to know, but Ragnor knew. He saw him, but he never asked.

 

When they were in Prague, they got lost again and Magnus split from the group. He was wandering in the streets for hours, when was night Magnus finally found himself, standing on the walls of the old city. He remembered the park in their city. He stood upon the wall and looked down. He was thinking about the fear Alec must have been through, and even after all he has been through he still cared about Magnus. After all he went through, he didn't want to hurt Magnus' feelings.

If he was crying, noone knew. He found a special postcard for Alexander that night. There was no blue sky. Just night, stars, Milky way. Whole world. Whole world Magnus saw in Alec's eyes the night they kissed.

 

Ragnor noticed something was wrong when they drove to Krakow. Camille only cared about shopping, parties and making out with Magnus, but Ragnor noticed, and he called Magnus out on it.

Magnus just shook his head, buying a postcard and sending it immediately.

 

"Why don't you write there anything?" Ragnor asked him in Stockolm. Magnus looked at him with frown. "For whom is it?" he kept asking. Magnus sighed, looking around, making sure Camille wasn't around. "Alec. Happy now?" "Hey, hey," Ragnor said calmly, "it's okay Magnus." Magnus shook his head. "It's not. I can't." Ragnor sighed. "Don't punish yourself Magnus, you don't deserve it. And she doesn't either." he pointed toward Camille who was walking to them.

 

They were in Copenhagen Magnus got the idea for the first time. He was buying a postcard for Alec, when he got it. Ragnor was right, they did not deserve it, but he had to do it. Camille loved him, what else they needed?

 

He proposed to her in Berlin. She said yes. Magnus wasn't sure why, but something in him broke. Wasn't he supposed to be happy? That night he almost wrote on the postcard. The words I am sorry were hunting him.

 

In the last city of their tour Magnus almost missed a boat because he forgot to send a postcard for Alec. He wasn't sure why he was feeling the way he was. He wasn't ready to leave that soon. He wasn't ready to face Alec again.

But after all, he has a fiancee now. They can be friends right? Maybe Alec moved on as well.

 

But seeing Alec in the hall with a flower wreath on his head. Magnus forgot how to breath. Unfortunately Camille presence brought him back to reality.

I am sorry. His eyes were crying when he introduced Camille to Alec. He saw the hurt in his eyes, and he felt like crying as well. But he moved on. He did. Alec will as well.

 

He was little dissapointed when he found out that Alec left almost immediately, but it was for better probably.

 

And then he heard what happened. How Raphael got beaten up again and Rosa got locked in the bathroom. And to his surprise Alec was the one who helped them. Catarina took him away from the group. "You need to talk to him Magnus." she started, "I am not saying that I am not happy for you Magnus, but Alec was waiting for you and this…" she paused and Magnus sighed. "There's nothing wrong," he groaned, "we are friends. There's nothing wrong." Catarina shook her head. "You're an idiot Magnus." she said, walking away.

 

He was back in the city for almost week, when he realized that they needed to talk. Alec was avoiding him. Magnus was sure of that. And whenever he tried to ask Catarina how he was doing, she told him to talk to him himself.

He had no other choice. He missed him. He missed the feeling when he was around Alec, how free, how himself he could be.

 

Because he was sure that Alec was avoiding him, he needed to surprise him. He went many times to Hunter's Moon, but Alec always found a way to avoid him. He begged Maia for their address and waited for Alec there, but the younger man never came. He even waited on the police station few times.

It was enough. They were going to talk and Magnus was going to wait as long as he had to. Alec can't avoid him forever.

 

He went to the police station and made sure Alec knew he was there. Then he waited. Alec couldn't spend there whole night, or could he?

He was sitting at the desk that was assigned to Alec and waited.

Soon he saw the younger man to walk out of the interrogation room.

 

~~~

 

Alec was annoyed. They have been interrogating the gang for days and still nothing.

"Do you want to get something to eat?" Luke offered him. Alec shook his head. "I am not that hungry." he said and walked to his desk.

Suddenly he stopped. Someone was sitting there. Magnus. He haven't seen Magnus for a whole week. The man was sitting there and looking on him. Alec rolled his eyes and turned around.

"Luke!" He called his friend, "I am coming with you." Magnus wasn't idiot. He probably figured that Alec was avoiding him for whole week, so he probably figured that he was avoiding him right now as well. But who cares? By the time they come back from lunch, Magnus will surely be gone.

He wasn't. He was sitting in Alec's chair, spinning around on it. It didn't seem he noticed Alec coming back, so the younger man just walked in Luke's office and decided to work from here. He doesn't want to talk to Magnus, or does he?

When it was slowly evening, Alec was on his way to get some coffee, when he saw Magnus again. The older man was still sitting in Alec's chair, his arms and head on the desk. Was he sleeping? Alec sighed. If Magnus was truly there whole day waiting for him, he must have been starving.

Fine. Game over.

He walked to the desk and put the coffee on the table. Magnus woke up. "Magnus." he greeted him with neutral expresion. "Hi Alec," the man smiled tiredly, "I have been waiting for you." "Oh really?" Alec shook his head, "Go home Magnus." Magnus stood up. "I can't Alec, I want to talk." "There's nothing to talk about." "That's not true. I miss you Alec, you're still my friend." Alec sighed. "What do you want Magnus, haven't you done enough already?" "Alexa-" "Don't Alexander me Magnus!" Alec warned him.

"Tell me you don't miss talking to me and I am gone." Magnus said and honestly, Alec did not expect that.

He sighed and looked on the watch. "Give me half hour." he said and sat on his chair. Magnus smiled and nodded. Alec tried to work, he really did, but how could he focus, when Magnus was sitting there in front of him, making origami from the old papers Alec didn't need?

When Alec finally wrote the last paper, Magnus was standing next to him, waiting for Alec to finally go. Alec opened the first drawer and put the papers in there.

"You kept the postcards." he suddenly heard Magnus spoke up from behind himself. He turned around, closing the drawer quickly. "Should we go?" he changed the topic.

 

"Uhm, can we just get a food real quick?" Magnus asked. Alec couldn't help but to laugh a little. "My treat." the older man added. Alec nodded. They took some hot dogs and went for a walk. They weren't sure where they were headed but it didn't really matter to them.

The silence between them was awkward, Alec was aware, but on the othe side, he had no idea what to say. What to do.

"I heard what you did for Raphael and Rosa." Magnus said, and Alec was glad that someone finally spoke up. "Thank you Alec, they are like my family." Alec just nodded. "I just did what I had to." "And it means a lot to me." Magnus said and both men continued walking in silence.

"How was Europe?" he asked quietly, just to break the silence. He looked on the older man who suddenly lightened up. "It was beautiful!" he spoke up immediately. "I loved it. We saw so many cities, so many countries and they are all so unique! Each has it's own culture, language…. It's amazing place. Have you ever been there?" Alec chuckled. Did Magnus not read his letters? "In 2018? Yeah, many times." Magnus stared at him "Define many times…" Alec shrugged.

"Enough to learn german, spanish, french, danish and a little swedish." Magnus gasped. "Are you kidding me? You're bilingual?!" "More like quadrolingual." he joked, Magnus hit him in the shoulder. "Ouch, what was that for?" he laughed, but he wasn't angry. Magnus was back.

While Magnus continued telling Alec about what all he saw in Europe, the men walked in the park and sat on the bench, looking down on the sleeping city.

"You never wrote anything on the postcards." Alec noted. Magnus didn't look at him. "I wanted to," he said, "I just couldn't find the right words." "Then why to send them?" Alec thought. "Because they reminded me of you." Magnus whispered. Alec looked at him. "They reminded me that you're real, that it wasn't just a dream." Alec felt tears in his eyes. "Stop it Magnus, that's not fair." "Sorry." the older man whispered.

They were quiet for a while, looking on the stars.

"I am sorry I wasn't here for you." Magnus suddenly said. Alec looked on him. "What are you talking about?" Magnus pointed to the wall. Oh, Alec thought, this. "It's okay Magnus." "No it's not, I am your friend Alec, I should have been there." Alec sighed. "Well I guess we both can agree, that there are things we need to work on… like talking." Magnus chuckled lightly. "Yeah."

 

"I carved my name there to remember who I was." Magnus spoke up after while again and Alec's heart started beating faster. "You don't have to tell me.." he reassured him, but the older man shook his head. "You were right Alec," he said, "and if someone can understand me it's you." Alec nodded, not saying anything.

"When my mother found out who I was… that I liked other people, … men… she was furious. She was shouting on me, that I was sick, that I was a monster." he stuttered. Alec was looking on him kindly. "She sent me in the hospital. She said that they would make me healthy again." Magnus took deep breath. "They locked me in small white room, and occasionally they took me out on examination… and when nothing changed, they would sent me on electroshock therapy.." he paused, shaking. Alec carefully took his hand between his.

"It was hell Alexander," Magnus said, looking in his eyes, "and I promised myself to never go back there." He was crying. "A part of me died there, they broke me. I felt like a monster myself… It took me a long time to accept myself, to push those feelings away… that carved name is there to remind me who I am. No matter what they do, they can't break me."

Alec hugged him tightly. "I am so sorry." he whispered. Now he understood. Now he knew why Magnus was behaving the way he was. Alec was there as well. Scared to love. Alec wanted to tell him that he is not a monster. That he is allowed to love whoever he wants to. That there's nothing wrong with him, but he couldn't. So he just hugged Magnus tightly and let the other man to calm down. He couldn't have Magnus, he saw that now, so the best thing he could do, was to make sure they were still friends. He needed Magnus in his life.

"I have been there as well." he whispered, looking on him. Magnus looked up. "My parents tried to change me as well… but they never succeeded." Magnus was looking on him with tears in his eyes. "They gave me a choice, either I could marry that girl, they found, or I would leave, be myself and never come back." "What happened?" Magnus asked carefully. "I never saw nor talked to them after that." Alec whispered. "I am sorry." "No, no it's okay," Alec pushed the tears away, "I had Izzy, and Jace, and Max… they supported me, accouraged me to be myself." Alec nodded.

"So Camille huh?" he asked, to change the topic. Magnus already pulled away from him, looking on the stars again. Alec saw the older man to smile weakly. "Yeah…" "How.. How long has it been going on?" Alec asked. He didn't want to know the answer, but he wondered how long it took Magnus to get over him. "Since Wienna." Alec gasped quietly. So like a month? They were dating for two months and were already getting married, what? "I am happy for you." he forced himself to say.

"Are you thought?" Magnus murmured. "As long as you are happy, no matter with whom, I am happy for you." Alec whispered after short pause. It wasn't completely a lie. "Thank you." Magnus said back almost inaudible.

"Did you…" Magnus started, "Is there anyone…?" Alec shook his head.

But Alec wondered what Magnus have done with the letters he wrote him while he was gone. Did he read them? Did he just threw them away? Did it mean anything to him?

"I am glad we're friends again." Magnus whispered, looking on Alec. _Yeah…_ , Alec thought, looking on the Moon, _friends_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, what do you think? Let me know! And as always thanks for reading :))


	12. I can't keep going like this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This has to stop Magnus," he said, "it's not fair to Camille nor me." "Alexa-" "No Magnus," Alec interrupted him. "Relationships take effort, and I am all for effort Magnus, but not like this." He sighed. "You have a choice to make." He said and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god, I have been writing this chapter and I was so happy about it... it's probably my favourite so far. Enjoy!

A lot of things changed after their talk.

They started talking more, they started spending more time together. And Alec honestly thought that things between them could be good again.

He really wanted things to be normal between them again.

 

Raphael and Rosa were living alternately with Magnus and Catarina. Raphael finally got a job in small shop but which earned him enough to be able to take care of them one day.

 

Suddenly they started meeting more often. Magnus would come on police station and they would have lunch or dinner. Sometimes when Alec hadn't to work at Hunter's Moon he would go to Pandemonium just to see Magnus.

They would talk about everything and quickly it became as easy as it used to be.

Magnus understood that Alec wasn't very fond of Camille and so he didn't mention her too much. Almost never. Actually never. Not unless Alec politely asked how she was doing. Not that he cared.

 

He was just sitting by his desk, finishing some paperwork when someone sat in front of him. Alec didn't had to look up, he knew who it was. But he pretended to not see him and continued signing the papers.

The man sitting in front of him got bored very quickly. He would start spinning on the chair. First one way then the other. When he found out that Alec still wasn't paying any attention to him, he stopped spinning and instead focused on Alec's nicely organized desk.

The stranger knew that tidiness was Alec's weakness. He started playing with the pins laying on the table, straightening them in special shapes, such as house, or pig or Alec thought for a while what was it that Magnus was making. Oh. A penis.

At that moment Alec got enough. He caught Magnus hand to stop him from finishing the picture.

Magnus chuckled. "Oh he lives!" he cheered. Their hands were still holding and their fingers unwittingly intertwined. "Magnus." He greeted his friend.

"I was thinking if you maybe want to get dinner?" Magnus offered. Alec smiled on him, disentangling their fingers. "Sure, why not?" he said as he stood up, picking up his jacket. "Where?" "It's surprise." Magnus teased. Alec groaned behind him.

As they were driving, Alec opened the car window and looked outside. It was so strange, that it was almost half year he was there. Wait, it was actually already a half year he was there. Alec chuckled for himself, looking on the buildings they were passing.

He already accepted that he was probably never coming back in 2018. But on the other side... He didn't actually mind. He got friends here. He got Maia, Magnus, Ragnor, Catarina even. He had a job he enjoyed. A flat. The only thing he missed was Izzy. And his family.

The car slowly stopped but Alec didn't notice, too deep in his thoughts. He smiled, thinking about his life.

"Alec?" Alec felt Magnus hand on his shoulder, "Alexander?" He finally looked up at him. "Where have you been?" Magnus asked kindly. "Far far away." Alec smiled on him kindly.

"Care to share?" Magnus offered. "Just thinking about my life back in 2018." He replied quietly. "Oh." "It's okay Magnus, I am not sad." Alec reassured him. "You're not?" Magnus asked, "No," Alec chuckled, "I uh.. it's weird but... I don't call 2018 'home' anymore." He paused, looking for the right words how to explain his feelings, "When I say I am going home, it means here." Magnus nodded understandingly.

"And where are we?" He asked. Magnus smiled on him widely. "I believe you have never been in car cinema, so I took you in one." Alec chuckled, looking around them. "Are you kidding me Magnus?" He was in an awe. "This is awesome." The older man smiled at him.

"Let's go get something to eat before it starts." He said and both men got out from the car heading to the closest shop. They returned just right in the time, when the movie began.

Alec really tried to focus on the movie, but it seemed almost impossible, when Magnus was there, sitting so close to him. Alec could feel the warmth of Magnus' body. Alec wasn't sure how long they were sitting there, but their bodies approached closer, their fingers intertwined… Suddenly Magnus shrieked and sat on Alec's lap, clutching his hand. Alec couldn't help but to laugh, "You okay there?" he asked, Magnus looked on him with wide open eyes. "That was scary." he said. Alec frowned. "Sure it was." he teased. Magnus hit him lightly, but didn't move.

Alec shifted a bit, so it was more comfortable for them. He was leaning against the seat and Magnus was sitting between his legs, half laying on Alec. Alec's hands were around Magnus and their fingers intertwined again.

Alec knew it wasn't right, but he felt so nice. He wanted to stay like that just for few more moments. So he did.

Suddenly the younger man got an idea. He looked on Magnus, the older man was watching the movie with attention, not knowing what's happening around him. Alec used his distraction and his hands moved to Magnus waist. He waited for the right chance and nudged him in the waist. The older man shrieked and almost fell from the seat if it weren't for Alec's strong arms, holding him close to Alec.

"What the hell Alexander?" Magnus shouted on him, but the younger man was too busy laughing than to answer him. "That wasn't funny." "Oh it was." Alec laughed. "You should have seen your face." "Shut up." Magnus murmured, but not angry anymore. "Make me." Alec teased, before he could think about the words.

Magnus suddenly put his lips on Alec's and the younger man fell silent immediately. But Magnus didn't stop, even thought Alec wasn't laughing anymore. Magnus turned around, so he could face Alec and kissed him again. This time Alec kissed him back.

Alec's hands were on Magnus' neck, dragging him closer, and Magnus happily obliged. Magnus hands were on Alec's chest, slowly going down, until disappeared from Alec's body. Suddenly the seat fell back, with both man. Alec gasped, but Magnus chuckled. "Payback." he whispered between the kisses. Alec couldn't help but to smile. This man.

It was hungry. Full of desire. Both man seemingly longing to do so for long time. And they weren't going to part any time soon. Alec wasn't sure how long they were kissing, hands roaming under the t-shirts, but Magnus suddenly pulled away, sitting on the seat next to Alec and straightening his clothes.

Alec wanted to excuse immediately, but before he could say anything, he understood why Magnus pulled away. Strong lights were lightning in their car as someone knocked on the window. Magnus opened it. "Good evening, officer." Magnus stuttered, handing the man their tickets. "Good evening sir, having fun?" He asked, looking on them with a frown… and sceptically. Magnus froze, so Alec spoke instead him. "Yes," he blurted out, "you see my friend here is getting married, so we have last man night out." he smiled on him. The officer smiled, "I see, congratulations." he said and was gone.

Alec couldn't help but to chuckle as he leaned back down on the lowered seat. Magnus looked at him with shock in his eyes. "Hey Magnus," Alec called him quietly, "it's okay." he took his hand carefully and pulled him down in an embrace.

They didn't kiss again, just sitting there in embrace, their hand intertwined, both of them watching the movie.

 

When Alec woke up the next morning, he groaned in the pillow. Shit. Why does he keep fucking this up? It isn't fair towards Magnus. He didn't see or hear from Magnus for two days and he wasn't surprised. Magnus probably needed some time alone to think, or probably cut all his connections with Alec. Alec really tried not to fall in the speculations and worries. They were still friends. They could be friends, could they?

 

When he came on the third day in Hunter's Moon, Maia greeted him with s smile. Alec went behind the bar and started taking drink orders, pouring the liquors. "Magnus was here." Maia told him, when they hadn't that much to do. Alec looked at her. "He was?" he asked and Maia nodded. "He invited us on some dinner he's holding together with Camille." she announced. Alec sighed. Magnus was avoiding him. "Okay, when and where?" "On Friday at 19.00 (7pm) in their flat." Alec nodded. That's two days. Enough time to prepare himself mentally.

"But isn't there the city's 200years anniversary?" Alec asked, Maia agreed. "Camille probably likes attention." she commented and Alec chuckled.

 

When they were standing two days later in front of Magnus' doors, Alec suddenly became nervous. Was Magnus angry on him? Did he destroyed their friendship?

Maia saw his worries, took his hand and offered him warming smile. Then she knocked on he door and Alec took deep breath, trying to calm down.

It was Camille who opened the door. "Maia, Alec!" she greeted them with a fake happines in her voice. Alec forced a smile. "Camille, nice to see you again." he said and they entered the apartment. Magnus was nowhere to be seen.

"Darling," Camille spoke up again, "could you please go check on Magnus, I believe he could use another woman's point of view." Maia smiled on her and left in the room where Camille pointed her.

Alec was alone with Camille, who suddenly stopped smiling. "I am not an idiot." She hissed on him and Alec frowned. "What are you talking about?" "I know what you are. You are sick and you are trying to drag Magnus with you." Alec was frowning, before he understood what she was implying. "No," he shook his head, "Magnus and I are friends." he smiled on her. Camille chuckled ironically. "I. Am. Not. An. Idiot." she repeated. "You stay away from Magnus or I will tell everyone what a monster you are." she threatened. Before Alec could say anything Maia and Magnus walked in the room. "We are just friends, and if you hurt him, I will hurt you." Alec whispered to Camille and smiled.

 

Magnus barely looked at him the whole evening, but Alec decided to ignore it. He talked with Maia and Ragnor, exchanging funny stories. Raphael came as well and they got talking about his new job. Alec was happy for him, things were finally getting better and their parent's process was already in course.

He drunk a little bit, but not too much so he could still make sure that Maia gets home. He was just standing on the balcony, looking inside where people were dancing. And so was Magnus with Camille. He chuckled lightly. On one side he was jealous, but on the other he wanted Magnus to be happy. He truly did.

At one point of their dance Camille leaned even closer to Magnus and kissed him, before Alec could tear his gaze away, Magnus looked up on him. Their eyes met. Alec internally cursed, remembering what happened the last time Magnus kissed woman while looking at him.

He walked back inside in the restaurant and waited for the song to end. When it finally ended and the dancers walked back to the tables and Camille made off Magnus, Alec took his chance.

"Can we talk?"

 

~~~

 

They walked for while until they were far away from the restaurant and others and were left alone. They were on the hill, whole city below them, the only lights coming from the restaurant in distance. Alec stopped walking and laid down on the grass. Magnus followed him.

Both men were quiet, watching the sky above them. It wasn't uncomfortable silence. Magnus was used to it, he liked it. Knowing that the presence of the other man was more than enough for Magnus.

"Magnus? Can I ask you something?" Alec suddenly broke the silence, Magnus looked at him. "I have a feeling that you will ask me anyway." Alec chuckled. "When I asked Ragnor if he trusts me, he um…" Alec paused, looking for the right words, "he said, that if your magic was real, than time travelling could be as well." Magnus sat. "Yeah…" he whispered.

Alec looked up at him. "Is it… is it true?" he asked carefully.

Magnus thought about it for a while. He did think about showing Alec his magic before, but thinking about it, and really doing it… that's something completely different. But he really really trusted Alec. Even Camille didn't know about it. He took deep breath and lifted his hand.

A blue sparks sparked on the ends of Magnus' fingers. He snapped his fingers and many fireflies appeared around them. Magnus heard Alec to gasp, he couldn't help but to smile. "This is amazing." Alec whispered, not tearing his gaze away from them.

Magnus suddenly wanted to show him more. To make Alec smile even more. He moved his hand, snapping again and a stars appeared in front of him. Alec chuckled as the stars in front of him started forming in constellations. "This is amazing Magnus, you're amazing." he whispered, finally looking on him with a wide smile.

Magnus heart was beating fast. He knew Alec would understand. That he was not going to be scared of him. The younger man was looking on him with a amazed face.

"What?" He asked quietly not sure what's happening, "What are you looking at?" Alec chuckled lightly, "You. Your eyes Magnus..." Shit. He forgot. He lost the control over them. He quickly looked away but Alec leaned closer to him. "They are beautiful Magnus," he whispered, his hand slowly turning Magnus' face back, so he was looking at him again, "you are beautiful." He whispered, his thumb brushing over Magnus' cheek. Everything in Magnus was screaming. Kiss me. His eyes pleaded.

But suddenly Alec pulled away. "Sorry, I shouldn't have.." he said, slowly standing up. Before Magnus could think about it, he caught Alec's hand and dragged him back down, kissing him. Oh how long he longed to do so. Since the car cinema to be honest. He felt how Alec tensed, trying to pull away, but before he could move, Magnus dragged himself closer to Alec. Sitting on his lap. Finally Alec kissed him back.

One of Magnus' hands was on Alec's neck, pulling him closer, the other one was roaming over Alec's chest. Alec's hand were suddenly everywhere. And Magnus wanted more. He wanted to get closer.

He pushed Alec down, so he was lying on the grass and Magnus on him. Not breaking the kiss, he felt how Alec's hand carefully roamed under Magnus' t-shirt, touching his bare skin.

A moan escaped from Magnus mouth. He felt how the younger man chuckled at that and continued touching Magnus, driving him crazy. "Such a tease." He whispered between kisses, attacking him with more kissing.

Soon his own hands wandered under Alec's t-shirt and started discovering Alec's body. There was nothing sexual about it. Just making out. But Magnus didn't mind, because even only kissing Alexander was doing things to him.

Suddenly the clock beat midnight and the fireworks started firing in front of them. But the men didn't care. They were to busy kissing and discovering each other.

 

Magnus wasn't sure when they broke up and how he managed to return to the flat, but he felt like he had hungover.

He looked on his left and saw Camille still sleeping. He slowly got from the bed and walked in the kitchen .

Shit. He remembered the last night events. He kissed Alec. No. He made out with Alec. Shit. He showed him his magic and then kissed him. But Magnus couldn't somehow make himself regret it. If he was being honest with himself... He enjoyed it. He did. He even wanted it to happen again. Being with Alec was so easy. Maybe he could do it. But on the other side... Before he could start freaking out someone knocked on the door.

Magnus groaned as he stood and walked to ward them .

"Alexander." He was surprised to see the younger man standing in front of his enter door. What are you doing here?" His heart started beating faster, "I didn't want to give you chance to avoid me." Magnus blinked few times and as he remembered how Alec was touching him again, kissing him deeply... "Magnus?" He heard Alec call him. "Sorry. You were saying?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I am sorry about yesterday..." Alec was looking straight in his eyes. "You have fiancee... And I just... It wasn't right from me and I am sorry." "No." Magnus blurted out. "I uh... I mean.. I was the one who kissed you, so..." He looked around them, they were alone.

"Alexander," he spoke up again, "I don't regret yesterday." He confessed. Alec took a while to process what Magnus just said and then sighed.

"This has to stop Magnus," he said, "it's not fair to Camille nor me." "Alexa-" "No Magnus," Alec interrupted him. "Relationships take effort, and I am all for effort Magnus, but not like this." He sighed. "You have a choice to make." He said and left.

Magnus wanted to say something, to run after him and say everything was going to be okay, but he couldn't. He froze.

Alec was right. It wasn't fair to them . He had to choose. 

 

_An idyllic life with Camille or to take effort and be with Alexander?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo I hope you liked it? As always thanks for all comments, I couldn't help but to notice, that there are many anonymous comments, who are you people, where are you from? (I just want to know :D)


	13. Alec's diary part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The main reason why I decided to leave to army and so get away from my parents was the wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short letter today ;)

_The main reason why I decided to leave to army and so get away from my parents was the wedding._

_My parents had many powerful friends on high places so it shouldn't be really surprising when they came to me one day and announced that I am going to marry daughter from one of the most known lawyers family._

_I have never seen her before and my parents asked no questions. The wedding was going to happen even if they had to push me there._

_Lydia Branwell. Lydia. She was a sweet girl. Our parents arranged us meeting so we could actually talk before our forced wedding._

_We met in a small coffee, but it was very awkward in the beginnings because after all we didn't knew each other, but already were going to marry._

_As I slowly found out, Lydia wasn't bad person. She was forced in the whole thing as well. I even believe that she was having it harder, since she had boyfriend at that time and were together with him for months, but her parents didn't approve because of his poor family._

_I then didn't hesitate telling her, that we both are on the same page and that I like boys. She, of course, supported me and we became friends._

_If we were getting married against our will, we should have at least get the best out of it. We started spending a lot of times together and for the first time I knew what it feels like to have a friend (someone else than family or Mr. Ba-Li) we used to talk about boys, which could be very interesting since we both apparently had the same type._

_When we were on the obligatory events we would have play a game, finding the most beautiful man on the ball. Lydia even was my wingman- wingwoman and tried to get me some laid. Unsuccessfully but it was worth it._

_Despite our forced marriage and parents nonstop control, during these times we felt at least a little free._

_Sometimes when Lydia needed alibi, I was there. Whenever she wanted to go on date with her boyfriend I was covering for her. When she spent the night with him, I would tell my parents she was with me._

_But sometimes it wasn't that easy. Not for Lydia, since she was so in love with her boyfriend and knowing she will be married to another man wasn't helping. I understood. It wasn't right. To me and neither to her._

_We would have spent our life living a lie. And honestly what kind of life is that? Lydia wanted to have children with her boyfriend and I wanted to find some boyfriend myself. To know how it feels to love and be loved._

_Izzy and Jace knew what was going on, and so did Mr. Ba-Li. I talked to him many times and he always just sadly smiled. He told me that he exactly knows what I feel. That he was on my place at one point of his life. When I asked him what he did, he said "I followed my heart." And smiled. We never talked about it again._

_He told me what he needed and I knew he was right._

_At that time a small idea started growing in my head. It was too small to tell anyone about it, but it was there._

_The wedding was coming up quickly. We had under two months._

_My relationship with Lydia became little harder than it was before. Both of us angry on our parents because of the wedding and also annoyed with each other since we didn't want to spend our life's together._

_I knew I had no other choice than to tell Lydia about my little idea. She tried to talk me out of it, knowing how furious would my parents became, but it was our best and only chance to be ourselves._

_I told Izzy about it as well. Since she found out about me liking boys, she became a very good friend of mine, never judging me. And oh, how angry she was when she found out about the marriage. She swore to help me as much as she could and later we even told Jace, who joined us very quickly._

_I suddenly was surrounded by love and acceptance. I suddenly wasn't that scared boy anymore._

_In our small club of five people we started planning a plan. My small idea suddenly became a huge one. Big enough for us to free us from our parents influence._

_Someone might say we worked to much on it that the plan itself became a cliche, but we had to. For our own redemption. If we were going to do it. We were going to do it big way._

_We persuaded our parents to let us plan the wedding. They happily obliged, thinking we were so in love. Little they knew._

_The wedding was going to be in an old church, where we made sure was dark enough to realise our plan, but light enough so noone would suspect anything._

_As all the quests were seated, our friends sitting in front, the ceremony started. First I stood there waiting for my future wife, who came together with her father._

_As we stood there, the priest started talking, suddenly all lamps turned off. Just for a seconds, when they turned on, Lydia was still standing there, but I wasn't anymore. No, instead of me there was standing a man wearing same clothes as I did and his hair was styled as mine._

_I was already hidden from the eyes of our parents waiting for the ceremony end. Due to the bad lightning none of them seemed to figure out trick._

_The priest, who also knew about it, continued the ceremony and the final revealing was coming. When they kissed and so were formally married, they both look on the guests who where cheering loudly._

_But our parents stopped clapping quickly when they realized that they have been fooled. Before they could say anything, I ran to Lydia and took her hand, together with her boyfriend dragging her outside. I made sure both of them got in the car, which then took them on the airport._

_I was the one going to deal with the consequences. Because after all, I had nothing to lose._

_Our parents were furious. And honestly I have never been happier to see them in such a mood._

_That's when my parents gave me the choice. They told me that if I leave the wedding, I am not their son anymore. I gladly left._

_Few days later I received a postcard, without anything but a number. I called Lydia immediately. She was on honeymoon far away from her parents and she wasn't coming back. We stood in touch anyway. Sending postcards for Christmas, birthday and so on._

_I never ever regretted that day when I stopped talking to my parents. I miss them, of course, after all they are my parents. But not the parents I needed._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But next chapter is long and emotional! (I think so :)


	14. A decision to make

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All the cities Magnus was with Ragnor during his trip through Europe. He recognized the handwriting. Alec.  
> He opened the letter written London. And started reading.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, this chapter is pretty long, and I believe that it's emotional as well.  
> Have fun, and as always let me know what you think!

Magnus hadn't spoke to Alec since. It has been week already and he still hasn't decide. He needed more time. But time was the only thing he hadn't.

The wedding was tomorrow. Camille wasn't in the apartment, because for good luck and so Magnus was alone. He would normally ask Alec to come over, but let's say things between them were… right, awkward. Not that he was blaming him, after all, he was right. It wasn't fair to Alec, to kiss him and the next days ignore him.

But Magnus needed time. He needed more time. He wasn't ready to marry Camille. Not while Alec was there. He needed to clean his thoughts, to understand his feelings. He needed time. But the only thing he hadn't was time.

Ragnor, Catarina and Raphael left few hours ago. Magnus looked on the clock. It was one in the morning. He should get some sleep before the big day. But he couldn't just sleep. Magnus started cleaning. He used to clean when he was nervous.

At 2 o'clock in the morning he was done cleaning the kitchen and living room, the only place left was the bedroom. He sighed and walked over to the room. His side was clean, but Camille wasn't exactly… organized.

He walked to the bed and started sorting the things, clean clothes in the wardrobe, the dirty one in washing mashine, he was standing next to the bedside table when he noticed some letters in it.

Magnus opened the drawer carefully. There was around 10 letters. Magnus counted them. 15. And all of them were opened. Magnus frowned, taking them in his hands. On every each of them was written a name of a city.

London.

Prague.

Rome.

Copenhagen.

All the cities Magnus was with Ragnor during his trip through Europe. He recognized the handwriting. Alec.

He opened the letter written London. And started reading.

 

_London._

_Dear Magnus,_

_I don't even know what to say, how to start. I know you won't be able to read this until you come back home. Until you come back to me and a lot of things can change in even so short time._

_I used to write letters to Isabelle when we were out in war. When we would split up and couldn't talk to each other I wrote her letters. But unless like you, she never got to read them. Sometimes I wish I kept them so she would know how much I missed her._

_I am sorry how we left things before you left Magnus, I miss talking to you already. I was so nicely surprised when I received your postcard Magnus. So thank you._

_London is lovely city. I believe you enjoy it. I would recommend you some places, some restaurants but most of them hasn't even been built yet. It's funny thought._

_I wonder how much of history I could change here. What if I told people what's going to happen? Will it be thanks to me that it will happen? Or will I change the course of the whole history? It isn't like I could find the answer anywhere..._

_I hope you will send another postcard Magnus (you don't even have to write anything)_

_Love,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus blinked few times to push the tears away from his eyes and reached for second letter.

 

_Paris._

_Hey Magnus,_

_It's me again. I hope you're doing well, you should send some letter to Catarina as well, she misses you, you know? I do as well..._

_Working out in the field with Luke is amazing job Magnus, I always wanted to help people and here I am. It reminds me of butterfly effect. Do you know what it is? Sometimes I get confused about informations I have from 1950s and those you can't even know about..._

_Basically it just says that even small things can make huge difference in future. I wonder if I have ever done anything like that. Did I ever change someone's life enough to make such a difference in future?_

_I hope you have been on Eiffel tower. You shouldn't miss that, there's amazing view from it. I remember when I was there, we were just passing by, but it's lovely city. They have good croissants thought._

_Miss you,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus chuckled. Alec was always a thinker. But Magnus didn't mind. No, he really enjoyed their talks about life. About human existence. It was truly interesting.

He took the next letter and sat on the bed.

 

_Madrid._

_Hi Magnus,_

_How are you? I believe you enjoy it because Europe is beautiful place. Traveling is always so much fun, but please be careful._

_Things here are still pretty much the same. I am working on the police station and sometimes I have night shifts at Hunter's Moon. It's earning me enough money so I already pay equal rent with Maia and I feel like I finally start living here. In the 50's. How I wish you were there. You were the first person I would run to to tell them about my day and all the news but I guess we can't always get what we want._

_I promised Catarina to come every few days for a lunch with her and Madzie. Seriously Magnus, it's very irresponsible from you to not to send them even a postcard._

_Madzie is a nice girl. I sometimes come to look after her, when Catarina wants to have free evening._

_You should watch out because there's a huge possibility that soon she will like me more than she likes you._

_Better come back before I steal her from you._

_Come home soon,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus smiled, tears coming from his eyes. He dried them and quickly reached for the next letter.

 

_Milano._

_Ciao Magnus,_

_Another week passed by and your next postcard came. I like it. I like all of them. I keep all of them in the drawer in my desk at police station._

_I would send you some as well, but I don't know your address and before it would arrive there, you would be long gone._

_I was always scared of loosing you Magnus, I thought that when you leave I will be alone. That I will became invisible and noone will see me. That I will became noone._

_I lost everyone Magnus. My family, my friends. I lost Izzy and I can't loose even you._

_But it gave me time to think. I was wrong. You are always going to see me. It doesn't matter if you fell in love with someone else. It doesn't matter how close friends we will be. You'll be there. You're not going anywhere._

_So no matter where you are right now, no matter whom you love, just make sure you come back okay?_

_There are still so many things I haven't told you about. All the discussions about life we haven't had yet. The walks in the park. The things you need to show me._

_I'm looking forward them all._

_Alec_

 

Magnus was looking forward them as well. It was the best thing about talking with Alexander. He understood. He was a thinker. He was overthinking. And Magnus admired it.

 

_Rome._

_Hi Magnus,_

_Still in Italy I see. Do you like it then?_

_How is Ragnor anyway? Are you already annoyed with him?_

_I wonder which city you are travelling next. I remember the map you had on the table, but I don't remember what all countries and cities were there. Is the next stop Switzerland? Or Slovenia? Croatia? I could bet._

_Madzie was asking about you the other day, what should I tell her? I promised her you will surely bring her some gift from Europe. Don't betray me, I am building some relationship with her and I am no a liar okay? Bring her something._

_She is clever girl, when I was putting her in bed yesterday she was talking about fireflies. Do you know anything about that Magnus? She told me you snapped your fingers and whole room was lightning._

_Are you some sort of magician? Can you conjure flowers out of nowhere? Make things dissapear? Did you find me, made me your magic trick and now dissapeared?_

_I hope not,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus remembered the night he was with Alec in the park and showed him his magic. The excitement that was in Alec's eyes. He wasn't scared of him. He wasn't.

 

_Zurich._

_Hi Magnus,_

_It's already over month you are gone. To be honest I am little jealous. You went out on holliday and have so much fun. I never knew that feeling. I have never been travelling just because I could. I travelled only for the purpose of transporting somewhere._

_As I said once, people in fututre always keep running somewhere. They never stop to look around them, to appreciate the beauty of the world around them._

_At first I didn't understand what exactly they meant by it, but now I do. Living here, I already noticed the change. Here noone runs. Everyone enjoys their life and family is more important than career._

_I was same as them. Since I joined the army I didn't stop. I never took the days off, unless I had to, unless I wanted to go home, but even that was rare. I was indeed running, and I have run so lond and so far that I wasn't able to stop, to get back home._

_And I was aware. I was aware that I was slowly loosing my family, that I didn't enjoy life as much as I used to. I was aware, but I didn't stop running, no, I instead ran faster. But I regret it._

_They say that one can not appreciate things they have, until they loose them. I lost everything by coming here. But I also recieved many other's._

_You were one of them,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus suddenly felt bad. He never asked Alec how he was feeling about being stuck in the 50's. He couldn't imagine what shock it must have been for him, to be taken from his life and put in another one. He should have been here for him, and instead he ran away, scared that Alec will leave as everyone else around him. But Alec was the person who was running with him. They both were running on the same track, next to each other, trying to reach the same goal.

 

_Wienna._

_Magnus,_

_I have to excuse for my last letter. I understand it might have came out the wrong way. I didn't want to say that I am unhappy here. It sounds weird when I say it just like that. Indeed, in the beginning I thought this was punishment for me. I thought that universe was punishing me for all my sins, all the people I killed, but the longer I was here, the more I realized how wrong I was._

_I thought that this had to be a dream. A long one. It has to be dream, because I could have never have life such like this in 2018. Suddenly I didn't think that it was punishment anymore. Suddenly I felt like coming home. I don't know why Magnus. But meeting you, everything felt like it started making sense. The more I get to know you, the more things fall in pieces._

_I don't know how to explain this feeling, but I am just being honest with you. I would never lie to you Magnus._

_I would never,_

_Alec_

 

Alec didn't had to explain to Magnus what feeling it was. He knew it very well by himself. The day he was in the park, the day he found Alec next to the river, something happened. Magnus wasn't sure what it was, but things suddenly started making more sense. And Magnus was scared. Scared because he didn't understand what was happening.

 

_Zagreb._

_Happy birthday Magnus,_

_I wish you were here so we could celebrate. But when I am thinking about it, maybe it's a good thing you are not here. I didn't bought you anything. I don't even know what I should buy you._

_You would probably like some clothes, or make up, but you know me… My shopping skills are very bad. I would probably buy something you wouldn't even like, or it would be your style or type._

_Flowers are probably not your thing either, and so are not comics. You see how I am running out of options?_

_But hey, guess what, I found something I think you could like._

_Happy birthday Magnus,_

_I hope you enjoyed them,_

_Love Alec_

 

Magnus looked in the envelope, there truly was something in there. He turned it upside down and the small object fell in his hand. Magnus took a closer look at it. It was a ring. With a letter 'M' written on it. Magnus chuckled, trying it on. It fit. He wasn't sure how Alec guessed his ring size, but it fit.

He smiled and opened another letter.

 

_Budapest._

_Hello Magnus,_

_It's me Alec. You probably figured that out already. Who else is probably writing you right?_

_It's going to be two months since you're gone. Are you also thinking about me as much as I am about you? I am not so sure about anything anymore._

_I don't know why I keep writing you letters when you can't even read them and when you come back, so much things could be changed that you will hate me even more. I don't want you to hate me. Please. Don't hate me._

_Alec_

 

Magnus sighed. How could he ever hate Alec? He wanted to run to his flat and tell him that he doesn't hate him. That he could never. The next letter was bit more crumpled.

 

_Prague._

_Hi Magnus,_

_Just ignore this one letter. I have a reason to believe that Maia managed to put more beers in me than I would like to._

~~_(I am drunk)_ ~~

_Not that drunk thought, just to make things clear._

_Why don't you ever write something on the postcard. I feel like you're not talking to me... Are you still angry on me? Because I am sorry._

_I understand that you don't want to be with me, but I know you feel what I feel Magnus. I am just not scared huh..._

_You know, there's one thing that really sucks on 1950's. I can't ask you out on a date. I can't kiss you in public. I can't marry you nor adopt children with you... All this is possible in 2018._

_Do you want to go with me to 2018? We are going to be happier there._

_Just give me few months and I will built us a time machine so we can get back or more like we can get to future... If it works, which I unfortunately can't promise you, duh._

_Anyway, I am going to start working on it._

_See you Magnus,_

_Your lovely ~~drunk~~ not so drunk Alexander_

 

Magnus couldn't help but to laugh a bit. He never got to see drunk Alexander. Well, now he can add it to his list 'Things to do with Alexander'.

 

_Krakow_

_Hello Magnus,_

_You're probably not going to like what I am going to tell you in this one, but you need to know. You will probably find out anyway._

_Few days ago I met a friends of yours. Raphael. And Rosa. Before you freak out, they are okay now._

_I did my best to help them, and I believe that now everything should be alright I even asked Luke for help._

_But they need you Magnus. So please come back soon. I don't know what to do. I don't know what I am doing._

_Alistair told me that the police is already on their case, but it's not easy and Raphael is scared that they will take Rosa away from him._

_I promised him that no such thing will happen. But what if I fail him? What if I can't do anything and he will hate me for the rest of his life?_

_Magnus please come back and tell me what to do. Help me make sure that they can stay together. I am scared that I will fail him. That I will fail you all,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus was aware that he was crying, but he couldn't stop. He wasn't there when he should have. He wasn't there for Alec when he needed him.

He dried his hands wet from the tears and reached for one of the few last letters.

 

_Stockholm_

_Hey Magnus,_

_It has been another week. Things with Raphael and Rosa got better._

_Thanks God that Raphael decided to write the testimony, because it actually seems good for them. Even thought he isn't 18 yet, the court seems to have no problem with Rosa living with him._

_For now they live with Catarina, but Maia and I agreed that they can stay with us anytime. It's funny that few days I didn't even know them but yet they have already become so important to me. I am not sure why, but they feel like my responsibility and I am going to make sure they are okay._

_Raphael is cool guy, I don't know why you haven't introduce us yet. Or maybe I have an idea, he told me some awkward stories about you. It was fun._

_I would have never guessed that you would freak out just because you client had not matching clothes and nails. I mean, Magnus who cares about that?_

_You do. Of course._

_Maybe I should talk with him even more, do you think he is going to tell me some more? I hope so, so I can blackmail you later, when I want you to pay attention to me, sounds right, doesn't it?_

_See you,_

_Alec_

 

Blackmail? Magnus thought, You wish. He was already taking another letter.

 

_Copenhagen_

_Hej Magnus,_

_Hvordan går det? I still remember some danish. Yeah… surprise, I speak danish as well._

_Denmark is beautiful country, isn't it? As they would say- hyggelig._

_Sooo.... It's already under a month until your return. I suddenly feel nervous. I don't know why but I do. In good way._

_I would write you more, but I don't know what. It is funny isn't it? How to the person I want talk the most I actually speak the least._

_As Danes say,_

_Vi ses,_

_Alec_

 

Magnus somehow felt sad that Alec didn't wrote that much in this letter but on the other side... He never wrote anything. He took the penultimate letter.

 

_Berlin._

_Dear Magnus,_

_If I am not mistaken, this should be your penultimate postcard, right?_

_On one side I am happy because it means you will come back soon, on the other side I will get no more postcards._

_Guess I can't have everything I want._

_I miss you,_

_Alec_

Magnus noticed that the letters got shorter and shorter. He took deep breath and opened the last one.

 

_Hague._

_My dearest Magnus,_

_So this is it. Your last stop, your last postcard, my last letter. I am so happy to see you again. There are so many things I want to tell you. There are so many places I want you to take me._

_I realize that after you come some things will probably change. I don't know how much. I don't know if you will speak to me at all, so I am just going to write you. Unless you threw these letters away. But I hope you will read them. At least this one._

_You have been here for me in my hardest times and you didn't give up on me. You didn't sent me on police nor in the hospital. Which I am very glad for._

_You believed me even though you had no reason at all. You could have just sent me away, but you let me stay._

_Even after all we have been through, I want to be here for you Magnus, if you let me. No matter whom you love, who are your friends or what you do._

_I am going to be here for you. Please don't push me away Magnus. I am not going anywhere. No matter what happens between us, no matter how angry you are going to be, you are always going to be welcomed at my place._

_I am always going to love you Magnus, I know you are scared, but you need to know that you're not alone. There is always going to be someone who will love you. Who will see you when you think noone else does._

_I am not going anywhere._

_Alexander_

 

Magnus put the last letter back on the bed to the other letters. He was a mess. Crying. Everything Alec wrote. And Camille hid it from him. Magnus was suddenly so angry on her.

Alec was right. He had to choose.

 

His head told him to marry Camille. But his heart was screaming Alec.

 

He took deep breath, trying to calm down. Life of lies or life of love? That was easier said than to decide.

 

He needed to talk to Camille.

 

He walked out of the bedroom, taking his jacket and leaving the apartment.

 

He ran the whole way. The adrenaline rushing in him. He was suddenly so happy. He suddenly felt like he knew what to do.

He knocked on the door. Noone opened. Magnus figured that everyone was sleeping since it was 3 o'clock in the morning.

He knocked again.

The door slowly opened and Magnus saw Alec standing there. "Magnus." The younger man whispered surprised. Before Magnus could think about it, he closed the space between them and hungrily kissed him.

Alec quickly pulled away, startled. "I told you we have to stop." He said, "I found the letters." Magnus whispered, as he walked in his bedroom, Alec followed him, closing the door behind them.

The moment the door closed Magnus turned again, pressing Alec against the door, kissing him. Alec kissed back this time, but quickly pulled away. Again.

"We need to talk Magnus." He whispered and Magnus groaned. He wanted Alec. Now. "Camille read the letters, she hid them away from me. I haven't read them until now." He said and tried to kiss Alec again but the younger man dodged. Magnus groaned.

"I want this." he whispered, looking on Alec, "I want to try whatever is going on between us Alexander." Alec was looking on him, not saying anything. "I uh.." Magnus pulled away from him and sat on Alec's bed. "What you wrote in those letters… you were right. I am scared Alec, I am, but my curiosity is stronger." Alec walked over to him, but didn't say anything. "I want to be with you Alexander. Even thought we can't go out on dates, we can't kiss on public, I can't even hold your hand and don't get me even get starte-"

Alec silenced him with kiss. "I am all for effort." he whispered before kissing him again. "As long as you are." Magnus nodded but didn't say anything, too busy kissing Alec back.

Alec leaned against him, pushing Magnus on the bed not breaking the kiss. His hand behind Magnus neck, pulling him closer. Magnus hands quickly started roaming under Alec's sweater, admiring his muscled body. Alec's hand slipped under Magnus' shirt. Magnus couldn't help but a moan escaped from his mouth. Alec chuckled, continuing to unbottoning the shirt. Once he did he took it down from Magnus' body. Magnus whined when Alec pulled away, putting his own shirt away.

Alec chuckled, teasing Magnus and watching Magnus, not touching him. The older man was impatient. He wanted to be with Alec. Now, that he finally could. His hand went behind Alec's neck and pulled him back to Magnus, who -finally- kissed him again.

Both men were lying in Alec's bed, shirtless, eagerly kissing. And Magnus was happy. Soon he felt like there was way too many clothes on him given that Alec was already only in his sleeping boxers and Alec seemed to have the same thought. His hand wandered to the lower parts of magnus body and slowly unbottoned his trousers, giving him time to stop him. Magnus didn't.

And so they were lying there, with nothing but boxers on. Magnus was overwhelmed by all the skin, warmth and closeness of the other man. "Can we…" Magnus broke the kiss and Alec whined a little, looking down on him with big hazel eyes, "can we take it slow?" he asked unsurely. Alec kissed him quickly and smiled. "As slow as you need." he whispered, his hands going from Magnus' lower parts higher. Magnus kissed him again.

They were kissing and it didn't became anything else and eventually both of them fell asleep in warming hug, embracing each other, being close, now they finally could.

Magnus thought that he didn't deserve Alec. That he didn't deserve all this love.

But he doesn't care. Not tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo I hope you liked it ;) le'me know


	15. A wedding to attend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Where are you going?" Ragnor asked him, Raphael looked back on them. "To get Alec. We need Alec." he said, before closing the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry, I just can't resist drama :(

When Alec woke up in the morning he was surprised by the warmth surrounding him. He looked on his left and saw Magnus. His head was on Alec's shoulder and his hand was around Alec's waist.

Alec smiled as he remembered what happened just few hours ago. Still smiling, he took Magnus' free hand and intertwined their fingers. Then he noticed it. Magnus was wearing the ring Alec bought him for birthday.

He was lying in the bed, enjoying the presence of the other man, who was still sleeping. After few minutes he got bored. He started pressing small kisses all over Magnus face, trying to wake him up. He succeeded. The older man few minutes later murmured and turned around. Alec whined and pressed again Magnus' back, kissing him on his neck.

"Alexander." he heard the older man to groan in the pillow and then he turned around. "Good morning." Alec whispered, smiling on Magnus. "Morning." he answered, putting his head back on Alec's shoulder. Alec put a small kiss on his forehead. But didn't say anything more, giving Magnus time to say something, maybe he regretted it?

"I don't… regret this, you know?" Magnus spoke up quietly and Alec looked down on him, "I meant everything I said yesterday." Alec smiled and kissed him. Magnus moaned in the touch, still not getting used to feel so good kissing Alec. Alec's hand quickly found it's way behind Magnus' neck, dragging him closer. "I could get used to this." Magnus said between the kisses and Alec smiled.

Suddenly the door widely opened. "Morning lovebirds!" Maia greeted them loudly. Alec felt how Magnus tensed after him, hiding his head in the crotch of Alec's neck. "Morning Maia," he greeted her, "would you mind knocking next time?" Maia chuckled ironically, "Would you mind keeping it down next time?" she pointed out their make out session. Alec chuckled. "Sorry I have love life and you don't." he teased and Maia sticked her tongue out on him.

"By the way breakfast is ready." she announced and left. Alec chuckled and looked down on Magnus, who was still hiding in the crotch of his neck. "Hey Magus," he whispered, his hand moving Magnus face so he was looking on him, "it's okay." he smiled on him kindly.

Magnus swallowed before speaking up. "I uh…" "It's okay, you don't have to explain." Alec smiled and kissed him lightly. Magnus melted in the touch immediately. "How about we get dressed and go take some food?" Magnus just nodded leaning closer to Alec, asking for another kiss. Alec obliged happily. When Magnus deepened the kiss Alec didn't complain.

"We are not getting to breakfast like this." Alec teased, but Magnus wasn't having it. "Just few more minutes." he pleaded and who was Alec to say no?

When they finally managed to tear apart, put clothes on, walk out of the bedroom and sit to the table, Maia was already waiting for them with a smile. "Morning." she greeted them again as they sat to the table. "Hi." Magnus whispered still little shocked. Alec put his hand on Magnus knee carefully and offered him kind smile.

"Hey Mags," Maia said and Alec frowned at that nickname, "it's okay," she said kindly, "you're always welcome here, alright?" Alec felt how Magnus calmed. "Mags?" he teased. Magnus rolled his eyes and Maia chuckled. "Long story short, he was drunk." Alec frowned. "Care to share?" Ales begged. Maia smiled and looked on Magnus with raised eyebrows.

"Don't you dare." Magnus threatened, but Maia only laughed, looking back on Alec. "So, Magnus was really drunk, and I mean so freaking drunk, so he came to the wrong bar, Hunter's Moon," she specified  "anyway he was telling everyone his name might be Magnus, but insisted that everyone calls him Mags." Alec laughed and Magnus next to him groaned, hiding his head in his shoulders, "That's enough." he said, and Maia laughed.

"Aw don't be shy _Mags_." he teased the older man, as he leaned closer and kissed him on his forehead. Magnus pushed away from him, murmuring something Alec didn't fully understand. But he didn't push on him, instead he gave him a piece of bread and offered him a butter. "Or how do you like Magsie?" He teased again and Magnus frowned on him. "Maggie?" Alec tried again as Magnus rolled his eyes. "Mag? Maggy?" Alec kept guessing, until the older man got enough and his hand slipped under the table and touched Alec on his thighs, dangerously close to his crotch.

Alec silenced immediately looking on Magnus with wide eyes. Maia looked on both them with questioning look. "You two are horrible." she announced as she walked in the kitchen and brought back some coffee.

The mood lightened after that and Magnus calmed down enough to join the conversation. Alec found out, that he knew Maia for some time now, since they both were working in a bar. And let's say, that a lot of interesting things happens there.

After breakfast both men returned in Alec's room. Alec jumped on the bed and turned around to face Magnus. The other man was still standing in the middle of the room, looking at him. Magnus sighed and Alec looked at him, he didn't had to say anything. Alec understood what he was thinking about. He has to cancel the wedding.

"Are you sure?" Alec asked, sitting on the side of the bed, raising his hands to reach Magnus'. The older man walked closer to him and intertwined their fingers. "I am." Magnus said, smiling sadly on Alec. Both men knew it was inevitable, so the earlier they done it the better.

"Should I go with you?" Alec offered, but Magnus shook his head firmly. "I have to do this alone." He spoke up quietly and Alec nodded.

"Will you come tonight?" Alec asked quietly. Magnus smiled on him. "I will." he whispered as he closed the space between them, kissing Alec lightly. Alec then walked him out on his way to job, smilling on him kindly, before leaving.

He couldn't kiss him nor touch him, because Magnus wasn't comfortable, because they were in the freaking 50's. But he accepted Magnus' decision, and as long as Magnus wanted to try with him, he was happy. He looked around one last time, smiling on Magnus and waving him.

 

~~~

 

Magnus couldn't breathe. It happened. He couldn't believe it. He kissed Alec. And spent the whole night with him.

Now he only had to cancel the wedding. Easier said than done. He decided to walk all the way to Camille's house, using the time to calm down and think about what he will say. Eventually he found out there was no way how to say it, to make it easier.

As he was standing before the house, he took one final deep breath and knocked.

 

Camille opened the door quickly. "Magnus!" she chuckled, surprised, "What are you doing here? Don't you know it brings bad luck to see your wife-to-be the day before the wedding?" she was smiling widely. Magnus sighed and looked straight in Camille's eyes. "Can we talk?"

Camille invited him inside and both of them passed Camille's friends and walked in the bedroom. "Is everything okay?" Camille asked him. Magnus walked to her and took her hands in his. "I can't marry you Camille." he said carefully. The woman gasped. "I barely know you, and two months are just not enough." he continued, "I don't think this is going to work out… this, between us," he pointed on them, "I am sorry, I truly am, but I am not the right person for you to marry." Camille shook her head and chuckled.

Magnus frowned, but Camille continued laughing. "I know what this is about." she said, "It's about your playdoll isn't it? _Alexander._ " she mocked. Magnus' heart stopped beating for seconds. "Yeah, I know about that." Camille continued. "He's sick Magnus and he wants to infect you as well, but you can't let him do that." Magnus shook his head. "You are so stupid Magnus." she spat out. "I read the letters, I know what he is." "You stole from me!" Magnus argued, "You stole the letters away from me, and you had no right!"

Magnus could bear himself being offended, but noone is going to insult his b- Alec. "He's not sick." he blurted out. "He's different and so what, you can not do anything to change that fact." he defended Alec. Camille chuckled ominously.

"You are going to marry me Magnus, or I am going to tell everyone who he is. What sick person he is." Magnus frowned. "You can't do that, you have no proof." Camille sighed. "Do you really think they need a proof? I can just point on anyone and they will take him on shock theraphy." Magnus growled. "You have no right Camille, to do that."

"Oh really?" the woman teased, "don't try me Magnus. You and me are getting married, or you can say goodbye to your Alexander." She tilted her head on side. "Is he really worth it Magnus? You can't even be with him. You can't take him on dates or kiss him." she continued. "You both are freaks. You will never get life with him. You won't have family." she kept argumenting.

She was right. Magnus knew it. He could never be with Alec. They would never have family. Maybe he should listen to Camille. He has to. For his own good. For Alexander's good.

Magnus was there. He knew what shock theraphy was. A hell. And if there was a way for Alec to avoid it, he is going to make sure he will be okay. He is going to make sure that Alexander is safe.

Camille saw him thinking. "I'll see you on the ceremony." she said and Magnus left. He has to do it for Alec.

 

He walked back in his apartment where were Ragnor, Raphael and Catarina already waiting for him. He cried the whole way back. His eyes were red and his friends noticed.

"What's wrong Magnus?" she hurried to him. "Did something happen?" Magnus shook his head, sitting on one of the couches.

"Magnus, you can tell us what is wrong." Raphael told him. "Is it Alec?" Ragnor asked and Magnus looked up on his friends. "I have to do it. I have to marry her." he whispered, drying his tears. His friends frowned. "I am okay, it's fine, just let's get ready." he ordered them but none of them moved.

"What are you talking about, love?" Catarina reached for him, "You don't have to marry her, it's okay, you have our support, no matter with whom you are." Raphael with Ragnor nodded. "No you don't understand. I have to marry her, or she wil…" he stuttered. "She will what?" Raphael asked. "She will tell everyone…" Magnus started hyperventillating, "They are going to send him to hospital…. To asylum."

Catarina gasped. "Magnus no," she tried to calm him down, "they won't, it's going to be okay." she hugged him, but Magnus was already crying. "You are going to be okay, Alec is going to be okay." she tried to cheer him up, but the man pulled away from the hug, drying his tears.

"The wedding is soon," he said as he stood up, "I need to get ready." "Magnus…" Ragnor tried, but the man interrupted him. "If you are my friends, then help me. Help me to get ready for the wedding." Magnus said harshly and left in the bedroom.

 

Catarina looked on Raphael with shock in her eyes. "We can't let him do this." she said. Raphael and Ragnor nodded. "I agree, Camille can't push him like this." Raphael said. They were quiet for while. "Just make sure he is okay," Raphael said, walking to the door.

"Where are you going?" Ragnor asked him, Raphael looked back on them. "To get Alec. We need Alec." he said, before closing the door behind him.

 

~~~

 

Alec was just sitting at his office when Maia with Raphael ran in. He looked at them, smiling. But seeing them, he realized something was wrong. He stood up from the desk and walked toward them.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his heart already beating fast, his breath quickening. "Magnus is getting married." Maia spat out. "Camille forced him, threating to send you to asylum." Raphael added. Alec gasped. _That bitch._

"Is he… is it..?" he couldn't form the sentence, shaking. Did he lost him? Was it too late? "Is it too late?" He managed to ask.

Raphael shook his head. _Thanks God._ "Not yet." He looked on his watch. "But the ceremony starts in few minutes." Alec nodded.  Trying to calm down. "I need..." He started, "I should..." He was breathing deeply. Maia understood.

"I will talk to Luke, go get your man." She said and Alec nodded, quickly running out of the station.

 

Now Alec was glad for all the evening walks with Magnus around the city, because he exactly knew where the church was. Now he just needed to get there on time.

Finally he ran to the church, opening the door and running inside. Hopefully it wasn't too late.

As he entered the room, everyone looked on him. Catarina with Ragnor visibly calmed down. Magnus was just standing there, looking on Camille who just said her "I do." Now was Magnus' turn.

He looked on Alec and gasped a bit, seeing him there. Alec was standing in middle of the room, breathing quickly after the run.

 

"Magnus..." Alec whispered, "don't do it." He pleaded. Everyone was looking on them. Alec noticed Camille holding Magnus' hand, keeping him on the place.

"Magnus," Alec spoke up again, "I meant everything I ever told you." Magnus was looking on him with tears in his eyes. "I am not going anywhere. We can figure it out." He paused. "We will figure it out. I promise."

He didn't feel the tears coming from his eyes, but Magnus was crying as well.

He pulled away from Camille and walked down the aisle to Alec. Who was watching him the whole time. "I am sorry." He whispered and Alec hugged him tightly. "It's okay." Magnus leaned in the touch. "We're okay."

Camille walked to them but Catarina with Ragnor stopped her. "Get away from my friends." Ragnor growled. "And don't you ever threaten my family again." Catarina told her. "Noone hurts our family." Ragnor added and they both walked to Alec with Magnus.

"Let's get out of here." Alec offered quietly and Magnus nodded, breaking the hug. The four friends left, leaving furious Camille and speechless guests behind.

 

When they finally got back to Magnus flat, Catarina and Ragnor left them alone, leaving in Catarina's apartment.

Both men were quiet. Magnus sat on the couch and Alec was standing next to the balcony door, looking outside.

Alec didn't know what to say. On one side, he understood why Magnus did what he did. After all Camille was threatening him. On the other side he couldn't help but to feel a bit offended.

Why didn't Magnus talk to him? After all they have been through... Does Magnus still not trust him?

"I am sorry." Magnus whispered after few silent minutes. "I know." Alec answered quietly, still looking out of the window. "I didn't want to..." "It's okay." Alec interrupted him, but unable to look at him. He didn't want Magnus to see him cry. He was so angry on Camille. For pushing Magnus. Was threatening them. He was disappointed that Magnus didn't talk to him. If they were going to be together, then they need to deal with problems together as well.

"Alexander please." Magnus begged and even without looking on him Alec knew the older man was desperate, "Please look at me Alexander." He cried and Alec sighed, pushing his own tears away, turning around and looking on Magnus. "I didn't want to hurt you." He apologized. "I know Magnus," Alec sighed, "but we should talk." He offered. "Set some rules, such as that as long as we are doing this, we are in it together." Magnus nodded. "We deal with problems together. You can't just push me away and think that's going to be alright, okay?" "Okay." Magnus agreed. "Also, whenever you feel like you don't want to do this anymore just tell me. No lies okay?" Magnus nodded. "Anything you want to add?" Alec offered him, still standing before Magnus. "What do you want from me Magnus?"

Alec knew he was the one in this relationship with experience, but he needed to make sure that whatever they were doing was on their terms which both of them agreed on.

"I want to do this," Magnus spoke up after a while, "I want to be with you Alec, but I want to take it slow." Alec nodded, "As slow as you need." He reassured him. "Of course no kissing and touching on public and even between our friends- at least in the beginnings." Magnus continued, looking on Alec who nodded on him again. "But I still want you to tell me what you want Alec." Alec smiled lightly.

"We can make it work right?" Magnus asked unsurely. Alec kneeled in from of him and took Magnus' hands in his own. "We can as long as we talk to each other, okay?" Magnus nodded with tears in his eyes. "C'mere." Alec whispered, pulling Magnus in hug.

The older man cried a bit, before he spoke up again. "She threatened me that she will tell people and that they will take you to asylum." He whispered and tightened the hug. "I was just so scared that I would loose you Alexander." Alec closed his eyes. Of course Camille did. "She knows about us." Magnus continued. "I know." Alec confessed. "She threatened me to leave you alone." "Why didn't you tell me that?" Magnus asked. Alec hesitated for a while before answering. "Because I thought you were happy with her."

They were still hugging but had to move on the couch, because Magnus' back started to hurt a bit. "I don't deserve you." He whispered. "Don't say that." Alec whispered back. "It hurts."

 

They spent the rest of the day in Magnus' flat. Alec made something small for late lunch and they ate in silence. Both of them were thinking about things hat were happening. Alec understood from where Magnuswas coming, but still it hurt him, that he couldn't tell him, even as his friend.

He was angry, kind of yeah, but when he looked on Magnus, who was avoiding his gaze at all cost, the remorses eating him, he suddenly felt bad for him. Magnus, who has been through all the things was again and again reminded of his past. All the bad memories coming back. No wonder he was so scared to love.

 

But Alec wasn't going to give up on him. Alec isn't going to leave.

 

"How about family dinner?" Alec offered, trying to cheer Magnus up. "Okay..." The older man agreed. They walked to Catarina's flat where were all their friends including Maia with Raphael who came straight from the police station.

All of them then headed to their favourite restaurant. None of them actually spoke about the wedding but Alec could see how delighted they were, even Magnus seemed to calm down as they talked.

After the dinner everyone headed home and Alec planned to leave as well, but Magnus came to him. "Will you stay the night?" He asked shyly. Alec chuckled. "Gladly."

And so they walked to Magnus' apartment side by side, laughing to some story Alec told.

 

They were going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would promise you things will get better, but you know me... you are never safe


	16. Dear Isabelle 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know you are never going to read these letters but it eases my mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's little sad, but hey, I know what he's talking about (I wasn't stuck in history, just in another country- pretty much similar)

_Dear Isabelle,_

_It's me Alec again._

_I know you are never going to read these letters but it eases my mind. Sometimes when I am alone I can hear you. It's funny because they say that person's voice is the first thing we forget. But I still can hear your laugh sometimes. Your teasing. Sometimes when I dream you're there. Standing next to me. And we are talking. Just like in the old times (or more like future times, time is weird thing)._

_I still remember our conversations about meaning of life. And I really miss talking to you. These letters are the only thing I have left._

_I have nothing Izzy. I have nothing. Every memory of you I had. Every picture. You aren't even born. I can't do anything. I can't look at you again. I can't talk to you. I can't hug you. The only thing I have are my memories. But they are slowly fading away as well. I am already an year here and so much things changed. I am not the man you knew. The Alec you knew, your brother, I am afraid is gone._

_I thought that after few days, maybe weeks I will somehow magically get back. Back to you. But now I see that I am not going to. I am so sorry Isabelle. I know I promised you. I promised you to always be there for you and now I broke it. I am sorry. I am sorry I am not there for you. I hope you will forgive me. If I found a way to get back to you, I would. I promise you that._

_Izzy I want you to know that I am thinking of you every single day. I want you to know that I miss you more than I could've ever imagine, and I would give anything to talk to you one last time. I still remember the last time that I saw you. You were standing there in the hospital, and begged me not to leave. You wouldn't let me leave, instead you hugged me, without saying anything. For some reason, when I hugged you, I felt like it would be the last time I saw you. Looking back now, I wish I would have spent more time with you, that I haven't run from the hospital, maybe if I listened to you, I wouldn't have been stuck here now._

_This year has been so weird for me, and so much has happened, but you were here for me anyway, I know you have guided me in the right direction. Somehow, you still influence my life a lot, even if you aren't here, even f I am not there with you. I can't even count the amount of times I needed to talk to you, to call you, because you were the only person I knew would understand my problems or situations I was going through. I wanted to shout. To cry. But nothing is going to bring me back to you._

_But you probably don't want to listen to me complaining all the time._

_So much things happened since my last letter. For start, I found out that Magnus likes me as well. But it wasn't that easy._

_He left for three months and when he came back he had a fiancee. Crazy I know. What's even crazier is that he proposed to her after 2 months, they were together._

_He was in Europe with Ragnor. Weird, isn't it? Europe is just after Second World War, I was scared that something could happen to them, but luckily they both came back. Even with one more person._

_I was scared Magnus is going to forget me, but he never did. He sent me postcard from every city they have been to. He never wrote anything there, but it meant a lot anyway. I wrote him letters back, but then I found out, that he never got to read them. His unkind fiancee- Camille, took them away from him and hid them. He found them eventually but it was nearly late._

_Camille knows about me, us, being gay and unfortunately she forced Magnus to marry him. She threatened to expose me and so sent me to asylum for an shock therapy, so of course Magnus agreed to marry her._

_If it wasn't for Raphael and Maia, I would have never got to know about it at time. I would have never got in there and stopped the wedding. Fortunately I managed._

_But I am scared now Izzy. It seems he doesn't trust me. Why wouldn't he then tell me? Why didn't he come to me and talk to me about it? Instead he decided to pretend that everything is okay and threw away his own happiness for mine._

_If we are going to try things between us, then I need to know that I can trust him. How do I trust him, if he doesn't trust me? Izzy, what do I do? I really like him Izzy, I do, but you know how much it matters for me, that people are honest, specially if they are people I care about._

_I want you to know that I remember your laugh Izzy, I remember your stories, and all ours shared tattoos, any time I look at them, I remember the day we decided to have them. I know that doesn't matter anymore, but I wanted to tell you._

_So, I just miss you. I miss you so much. Thank you for being the most influential person I've ever met, for being the best sister I could've asked for._

_I will never forget you._

_Love Alec_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is pure fluff. I can't write fluff, but I tried ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	17. Lets just stay in here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus could get used to this. All the effort was worth it. Alec was worth it. Magnus wasn't sure when but fell asleep, still smiling, his hand intertwined with Alec's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *BIG HUGE ASS WARNING* THIS WHOLE CHAPTER IS PURE FLUFF  
> I figured we all deserve it after that much drama

Magnus woke up feeling warm. He looked on the person lying next to him. Alec was pressed close to him, lying on his side, spooning Magnus. The older man smiled, looking on his sleeping boyf- Alec.

He shifted a bit, so he could press closer to him and bored his head in the crotch of Alec's neck, purring happily. It was rare that Magnus woke up before Alec, and he was going to use his chance. After few minutes Magnus pulled away from the sleeping man, only to being dragged back by Alec who was still half asleep.

Magnus smiled and doved his hand in Alec's hair, running through it, playing with his disobedient curls. Alec murmured something, still not awaken and shifted a bit. Magnus' hand moved from Alec's hair on his cheek. Magnus wanted to remember every single curve of Alec's body. As his fingers brushed over Alec's face, the younger man groaned quietly, pulling he blanket over himself and hiding his whole body under it.

Magnus chuckled, lifting the blanket and looking on Alec. "Go away," he man murmured, "I am trying to sleep here." "Okay," Magnus teased and pretended to be leaving the bed. It didn't took long for Alec to reach after Magnus and drag him under the blanket. "Hiding in blanket fort, are we now Alexander?" Magnus chuckled. "Shh." Alec whispered, pulling Magnus in his embrace. "Just sleep." "You're very endearing when you're half asleep." Magnus teased with a smile. Alec rolled his eyes and turned around. "No. Alexander!" Magnus whined, pressing against his back, trying to turn him around. "Babyyy." Magnus whined, brushing Alec's back, "please turn around." "No." Alec murmured. "Why not?" Alec sighed and lied on his back. Magnus chuckled.

You're so comfy," Magnus whispered happily, "you're my new pillow." He said as he put his head on Alec's chest and peacefully lied there. Alec chuckled, putting his arms around him. "Pillow hm?" He asked and as an answer Magnus purred. Both men then managed to fall asleep for a few more minutes.

 

This time it was Alec who woke up first. Both of them still hidden under the blanket, Magnus' head on his chest.

Alec started kissing him in his hair, forehead, cheeks and finally lips. Magnus pretended to be still asleep just to get more kisses. Which he got.

"I know you are awake." Alec smiled, kissing him again and Magnus purred. "Wake up." Alec whined, but Magnus shook his head. "Iamsleeping." he murmured in Alec's shoulder. "Hm?" Alec asked, but Magnus wasn't awake anymore, or he pretended to be so. "Magnus I am hungry." Alec tried again, unsuccessfully, the older man was ignoring him.

"That's it." Alec decided, "I am going to make some food." he said, slowly pulling away from the bed. Magnus whined. "How comes that I have to stay in bed when you want to sleep but you don't have to?" Alec chuckled. "Because I am irresistible." he teased, kissing Magnus on the top of his nose. Magnus arms reached for Alec to drag him down, back on the bed, but Alec was stronger.

"Get out." he said, taking Magnus' hands and pulling him up, "I am hungry." Magnus sighed and let himself being pulled from the bed. "I can't walk, you have to carry me." Magnus murmured. Alec chuckled and turned around, sitting in front of Magnus. He climbed on Alec's back and the younger man stood up. Magnus was actually surprised how strong Alec really was. "So strong." he sighed, putting his head on Alec's shoulder. Alec smiled and walked in the kitchen. Here he sat Magnus on one of the counters.

"What are we having?" Magnus asked and Alec looked at him. "I don't know. What you like?" he asked. "You." Magnus teased, "Can I eat you?" he joked before he realized what he said. Alec laughed, seeing his shocked face, "Sure you can… later." he said with a wink and opened Magnus' fridge.

Magnus felt the blush appearing on his face. He quickly hid his head in his hands and took deep breathes. "So pancakes, toasts, english breakfast?" Alec started naming kinds of breakfast they could make, but Magnus wasn't listening to him. "Magnus?" Alec calling his name brought him back. "You okay?" Magnus blinked few times. "Yeah." he smiled in the end.

"So what is it going to be?" Alec asked with a smile and leaned closer to Magnus to steal a kiss. "Mhm," Magnus thought, "pancakes." he decided. Alec nodded. "Okay." he chuckled, shaking his head as he walked back to the fridge and took the ingredients.

 

"Mhm." Magnus moaned as he tried the first pancake, "it's so good." Alec raised his eyebrows. "You know what?" Magnus offered, "You are going to be my cook and you will make me food every day." Alec chuckled. "Oh so let me get this straight, you're dating me just because of my cooking skills?" Alec asked and Magnus nodded as he took another bite. "Exactly. All the kissing is just small bonus. You know. Food that's what I love." He teased and Alec shook his head with smile.

"I am offended. I thought what we had was special." He pretended to be sad, but Magnus wasn't having it. "Only thing here that is special is your food. Sorry." Alec frowned and threw a dishtowel on him. Magnus chuckled catching it.

"How about I go see our friends and you meanwhile do lunch hm?" Magnus thought aloud and Alec took the pancake laying on his plate and threw it on Magnus who gasped. "This is officially war." He said as Alec laughed. "Looser makes lunch and dinner." Magnus continued and raised his hand. Alec chuckled and shook it. "Deal." He whispered and quickly jumped from the chair and ran in the kitchen.

Magnus stood up, but before he could do anything, Alec was already walking back with a bad of flour. Magnus froze. "Don't you dare!" He shouted, running around the table meanwhile Alec was laughing. Magnus noticed the glass of milk standing on the table and took it. Alec didn't move.

"So what is it going to be?" Magnus teased and smiled. Alec shook his head and took a handful of flour, Magnus prepared to spill his glass.

Alec attacked first, the flour everywhere. Magnus coughed few times, trying to locate Alec who was as well distracted by the flour, as soon as he did, he throw the whole content on his head and stepped away from him chuckling.

Alec looked up, totally soaked. "I am sorry." he whispered, as he walked slowly over to Magnus, his hands up, Magnus victoriously chuckled as he relaxed a bit. That was a mistake.

As soon as Alec got close enough to Magnus, he opened his arms and hugged Magnus. Great. Now both of them were set and dirty. Great. "I think you lost." Alec whispered in his hair." Magnus groaned trying to get away, but Alec's embrace was strong. Magnus sighed.

"Fine." He shouted throwing his arms and Alec chuckled. "Fine." He teased and gave him quick peck on mouth.

"Go change, I will clean here." Magnus said, defeated. "I'll help you." Alec offered but Magnus shook his head, snapping his fingers. Alec chuckled, watching him. "This is awesome," he said, shaking his head, "I'll never get used to it." Magnus smiled on him. "Shush, away you go." He said and continued cleaning as Alec went in the shower.

 

After everything was cleaned, both men sat on the couch, close to each other and got talking.  They were talking about everything and nothing. That was one of the reasons why Magnus liked Alec so much. Their together time was never boring.

They could have been just sitting and doing nothing and still it would be fun.

Around lunch Alec had to do some papers to work and Magnus meanwhile went to make lunch. It wasn't as bad as Alec expected.

They spent whole day in their small bubble, not knowing about the around world. And Magnus was happy. He knew they still had to talk with Alec, and that there was going to be a lot of changes but for now, everything was perfect.

 

In the evening Alec was sitting on the couch, reading one of the many books Magnus had in his libraries. Magnus wasn't exactly sure what he was reading but he didn't care.

He looked so cute, sitting there and focusing on the book. Magnus was sitting there next to him, his head resting in Alec's lap. Alec was holding the book above Magnus' head and his second hand was slowly brushing Magnus' hair, the hand leaving only when Alec needed to turn a page.

As Magnus was lying there, he thought. _About his past, about his future, about Alec. Sometimes he wished he could just spent the rest of his life with Alec in their small bubble where love is love. Where noone would be judging them. Where he could keep kissing Alexander. Holding hands with him. Even though it was not going to happen, and Magnus knew so._

_But let dreams be dreamed. He wanted to be with Alec. They were happy and Magnus felt something he hadn't have felt in a long time. Could it be love?_

_Fate was strange thing. They were different people. From different centuries even. Magnus was living almost a hundred years earlier than Alec, and yet somehow they have met. Magnus wasn't complaining, he really wasn't, but there just was something about Alec, that made him wonder. He believed him, he believed he came from 2018, it just felt so unreal._

_Magnus never got nice things, and here he was. A tall dark haired stranger, standing next to the river and Magnus was the one to find him that day. It was weird. Fate, someone might say._

_In the beginning Magnus thought that it's just a dream, that Alec will disappear one morning and Magnus will wake up, all alone again. He wanted to trust him, he wanted to talk to him, hell, he wanted more, but he was scared. He was scared that he is going to be alone again. That once he opens to Alec, the younger man will leave him. But he hadn't. Not yet._

_Alec didn't talk about 2018 anymore. Not as much as he did in the beginning. Magnus didn't push him, because every time he asked, Alec just shrugged, saying everything is alright and changed the topic. But he wasn't alright, Magnus saw it. He saw the pain, the sadness in his eyes. Alec wasn't okay, when he thought that noone was watching. Sometimes, when Alec thought that noone was watching, he took down the mask. He became sad, thinking, lost far away in his thoughts._

_But Magnus saw him. He saw him all the time and it broke his heart. Because he didn't want Alec to be sad. Because he gave Alec everything he could, but it wasn't enough. Because Alec was slowly becoming Magnus' home, but Magnus wasn't Alec's._

Suddenly Alec shifted a bit under him and Magnus looked up on him. Alec smiled on him kindly and whispered "Sorry." his hand brushing Magnus' hair. Alec turned his attention back to the book, but Magnus kept looking on him.

_He was happy with Alec. Everything they have been doing was so new for him, but he enjoyed it. Sometimes he felt like he wanted more. But he was scared. He didn't know how to ask for things he wanted._

_He tried pushing Alec away, only to save himself from feelings. He tried and failed. Fortunately. As he found out, being with Alec was so easy, he was much happier with him, he made him better person. He wanted to stop fighting. He didn' want to fight his memories anymore, he wanted to move on. To open himself to love. To Alec._

_And right now, after a long time he felt like he could. With Alec he could move on. They could have make it work. He wanted to make it work. To take effort._

_Maybe they couldn't be official, maybe they weren't allowed to kiss, hold hands on public, but Magnus didn't care. He wanted to be with Alec. And that's what matters._

_Fate is strange thing. Magnus suddenly thought. But what is fate? Is it God? Is it some person? A universe? Are stars the one guiding our lifes?_

Magnus looked on his fingers and snapped hem lightly. A stars appeared in front of him. Magnus started shifting his hands, moving the stars, making constelations, moving through the universe. He wasn't sure what he was looking for. Maybe fate? What is fate? Where can he find fate?

Alec wasn't reading the book anymore. He slowly put it down, looking on the stars in front of them, unable to talk. Magnus noticed. "Do you think stars have feelings?" he blurted out. Good job Magnus, he chid himself, couldn't you think of anything better? Something that would sound more... Clever?

Alec chuckled, still so breathtaken because of the stars. "I like to think so, yeah." he spoke up, his hand reaching to the stars in front of Magnus, carefully trying to touch them. "I believe that they are not just lifeless objects. That there's something more to them. I mean… the universe is so… big." Magnus smiled, looking up on Alec, his precious man, who knew that Alec was so interested in universe? But Magnus didn't dare to interrupt him, after all he looked so happy.

"Even thought how big the universe is and we haven't found any other life yet, I don't believe that we are the only intelligent life. There has to be something out there. We can't be alone. The universe is a pretty big place. If it's just us, seems like an awful waste of space." Alec quoted something and looked down on Magnus, "Carl Sagan said that." he explained, it told him something, but he couldn't exactly place it. The older man smiled on him anyway and Alec continued, unaware he was exaggerating and mumbling, but Magnus didn't mind. He found it rather sweet.

"I mean you haven't even been yet on Moon and my generation has already started exploring Mars." Magnus frowned. "Moon?" He asked quietly, but Alec even wasn't listening to him anymore, too deep in his thoughts, talking.

Magnus chuckled and took Alec's hand, intertwining their fingers. He didn't fully understand what Alec was talking about but he didn't mind, just being there with him was nice enough.

Sometimes Magnus could help but to chuckle, smiling widely, holding Alec's hand. The younger man was talking for minutes.

Magnus could get used to this. All the effort was worth it. Alec was worth it. Magnus wasn't sure when but fell asleep, still smiling, his hand intertwined with Alec's.

He woke up to Alec brushing his hair softly and calling him quietly. Magnus slowly opened eyes, looking up in the hazel ones.

"Hi." Alec whispered, smiling on him shyly, "Hi." "You should have told me I am boring you." Magnus shook his head, "It's okay. I like listening to your voice." Alec chuckled. "You don't like universe do you?" He asked.

Magnus shook his head again. "Not really." He said and Alec raised his eyebrows, asking for more information. He thought about it for while. Looking for the words. "It makes me feel small. Irrelevant. Weak. I don't understand them and that scares me."

"You are not weak Magnus." Alec said, playing with his hair, "short? Yeah." He joked and Magnus playfully shoved him in his chest. "Small and cute." Alec teased him and Magnus pushed Alec's hands away from him. "And you're heavy and rude." Alec gasped, chuckling. "I beg your pardon?" "You heard me giant." Magnus teased, his head lifting up from Alec's lap. But before he could leave, Alec's hands went under Magnus' arms and started tickling him.

Oh no. Magnus was ticklish. A lot. The older man started laughing immediately, squirming. "Stop." He shouted between laughs, "Alexander!" He tried but the younger man wasn't listening to him. "I... Am warn-" another burst of laugh, "warning you stophh." Alec chuckled and shook his head. "I can't breathe." Magnus shouted, still trying to get away from Alex, but wasn't strong enough. Few seconds later the tickling stopped and Magnus took deep breath, quickly jumping away from Alec.

"Aww baby come back." Alec called after him. Magnus chuckled on the nickname and turned around so his back was facing Alec. The younger man stood up and hugged him from behind, trying to drag him back down on the couch

 Magnus smiled, sitting up, so he could reach Alec's lips.

Kissing Alec was something he enjoyed every single time as if it was the first time they kissed.

And he kissed him again. Passionately. Pulling him closer. He could feel Alec smile in the kiss and he deepened it. Alec moaned in the touch and Magnus silently cheered.

Unfortunately Magnus couldn't help yourself and yawned. Alec chuckled, putting his hands around Magnus and lifted him in his arms. Magnus gasped, quickly catching Alec around his neck

"In the bedroom." Alec announced and started walking toward the room with Magnus still in his arms. Here both man fell on the bed and chuckled. Magnus was pinned against the bed by Alec but he didn't mind. "How about you get your beauty sleep, hm?" Alec offered but Magnus didn't want to. "How about we do something..." He slowly raised from the bed, leaning closer to Alec, "more fun?" He said and quickly kissed Alec, falling back on the bed and dragging Alec with him.

"Mag...Magnus, you are tired." Alec managed to say between the kisses but Magnus wasn't listening to him, "And I have work tomorrow." Magnus sighed. "You don't want to kiss me?" He asked and made big sad eyes on Alec who chuckled. "Don't try this on me Magnus." He said with smile and covered both of them under blanket. "No more touching until morning." He said seriously and pushed Magnus on his half of bed. "Sleep." Magnus rolled his eyes and turned away, showing Alec his back.

Of course he knew that Alec can't resist him for too long.

"Hey Magnus," he soon heard Alec whisper, "can you hold this for me?" Wait what? Magnus thought and with frown turned around. Alec handed him his hand and smiled. "Thanks." Magnus looked on their hands, "Uhm, it's just your hand." He said and Alec smiled widely. "Yeah." He whispered before turning of the light. "Oh." Magnus whispered when he understood that it was Alec's plan all along and pulled the hand closer, smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what do you think about this chapter? I mean... I am not good at writing Fluff, was it bad? Or was it good? Should I write more fluffy chapters?


	18. What are you?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Are you warlock as well?" He asked, but to his surprise Maia shook her head. "Then what?" He demanded the answer. Maia sighed.

Alec knew this day would come. They spent whole weekend together and honestly, Alec loved every moment of it. But everything nice has to end at some point right?

The weekend was over and Alec had to go back to work. And especially this week was hell. They were going with Luke after a group of some bank robbers and they were getting little hopeless. Amd to make matters worse, now their bank robbers had commit a murder as well.

Alec's and Luke's bosses were behind them, demanding finally some results. And they had nothing. It was like the robbers were magicians, Alec thought, it actually wasn't bad idea, he should ask Magnus later what he thinks.

And Magnus. He almost hadn't seen him since their nice weekend. And he missed him already, but with so many things to do... He just didn't have time nor energy.

The older man also seemed stressed. Something went wrong in Pandemonium and the club was now investigated, so Magnus had to be there. He usually left in the morning and came tired in the nights.

They usually just slept together, too tired to talk or to do anything else. Whoever came to the flat first, just lied in the bed and fell asleep, not even waiting for the other man. When the other man came, he went in the bed, spooning his man and fell asleep. In the morning they usually woke up at different times, so breakfast together was out of option.

And Alec was honestly getting annoyed. He wanted things to calm down and actually have some time to spend with Magnus.

When the week was finally over, Alec went in his flat to get some clean clothes and headed over to Magnus. Just before he could leave, he met Maia.

"Where are you going?" His friend asked him. Alec looked on her and smiled. "To Magnus, I haven't seen him almost whole week. Why?" Maia sighed. Oh. The trip. Alec promised Maia to go on week to her cabin.

"Oh shit I am sorry Maia." He said quickly, turning around, "I'll just pack and we can go." "No Alec, ... You haven't seen Magnus whole week, just go." Alec shook his head. "Nope. Non negotiable. I promised you, I am coming with you." "Are you sure?" Maia asked, Alec nodded. "Let me just tell Magnus and we can go, okay?" "Very well, but don't be late Lightwood!" Alec chuckled as he ran to Magnus' flat.

"Hi." He greeted him with a kiss when Magnus closed the door behind them. "Well hello there." Magnus smiled in the kiss, pulling him closer. "Finally I have you just for myself." Magnus was happy. "Um, about that,..." Alec pulled away from Magnus so he could look at him. "I actually promised Maia to spend week with her..." He said guilty .  Magnus sighed but forced a smile.

"It's okay." He said quietly. "When do you leave?" He asked. "I um... I just came to say goodbye." Alec confessed, looking down on his hands and back on Magnus.

"Hey, hey Alec," Magnus said as he came closer to him, "it's okay." Magnus smiled on him and Alec calmed a bit. "I am sorry I know how you have been looking forwa-" Magnus silenced him by kissing him on lips. "Don't waste time." He said, pulling him closer and Alec chuckled. "Eager aren't you?" He teased, kissing Magnus back. "When you come back?" Magnus asked between the kisses. "Friday. I'll come right away." Magnus nodded, leaning away from Alec. "I'll be waiting here for you." Alec smiled on him, slowly brushing Magnus' cheek, kissing him one last time.

"I will walk with you." Magnus offered and Alec took his hand. As long as they were in the building, they were safe. "Thank you." Alec whispered and both men left the apartment. When they walked out of the building Alec felt how Magnus pulled away his hand and shifted a bit more further from him. He sighed quietly but immediately forced a smile on Magnus. He understood that it was hard for him. After all he has been through and ... It couldn't be easy.

"What are you thinking about?" Magnus asked him, bumping in his shoulder lightly. Alec looked at him, "Just work stuff." He lied. Magnus raised his eyebrows. "Still nothing?" He asked , Alec managed to tell Magnus some details about their case before both men fell asleep, so Magnus had some idea what was going on. "But I was thinking…" Alec said, looking around them to make sure noone was listening to them, "I think that maybe… are there uhm…" he stuttered, unsure what to say, hoping that Magnus won't laugh at him.

"I think that the robbers might be a magicians as well." he whispered and looked on Magnus to see his reaction. The older man seemed to think about it for while. "That would… uh… make sense I guess?" he said quietly, as well looking around them. Alec gasped. "So there's actually more people, like you?" he asked. Magnus chuckled, looking on Alec. "Of course, Catarina, Ragnor, Madzie even.." Alec gasped again. "Madzie?!" Magnus nodded. "And there's so much more like Maia or Raph or…" "Wait, Maia?" Alec stopped walking. "Raphael?" Alec was so confused, they were warlocks as well? "Uhm, oh, uhm…" Magnus suddenly stuttered, looking everywhere else but on Alec.

"What are you talking about?" Alec asked again, Magnus frowned. "She didn't, uhm… Maia didn't tell you?" "Tell me what?" Alec was so confused. "Nothing," Magnus said, petting his shoulder, "just forget I said anything." Magnus shook his head and walked in the building. "Magnus tell me, no secrets, remember?" he tried following him, hoping for more answers. "I can't! It's not my place to say!" he said bit louder than he expected. Alec froze. Magnus never shouted on him like that before. "Alexander I am sorry…" But Alec never got to answer him, because both men were interrupted by Maia, who was just putting bags in front of the flat. "Hi." she smiled on them, "Sorry for stealing him away," she told Magnus with sad smile, Magnus just nodded on her, "It's okay." he said quietly. Maia looked between him and Alec. Both of them were frowning. "Is everything okay?" she asked, "Didn't I make you argue or something?" she startled a little. Alec shook his head. "We are okay." he spat out, going in the room to take his bags.

Maia looked on Magnus when the door closed behind Alec. "I am sorry?" she excused unsurely. Magnus sighed, "It's really not your fault. I just uh… he knows about me being a warlock, and I kind of thought you told him about you being…" Maia frowned. "Did you tell him?" Magnus shook his head immediately. "No. Of course not! But he's upset on me now…" Maia sighed. "I will talk to him, I promise, I will tell him." "You don't have to." Magnus tried, but Maia shrugged. "I was planning to tell him anyway." Magnus sighed. "Okay, have fun, I will get going."

 

When Alec walked back on the hall, putting his bags here, Magnus was gone. His heart ached a bit. He wanted to talk to him, not wanting to leave Magnus behind after they argued. "He left?" he asked quietly and Maia only nodded. Alec sighed and forced a smile. "Let's get going, should we?" he offered and Maia nodded. Taking their bags they walked down in the garages and put their package in the trunk, everything in complete silence. Maia was driving and Alec was looking out of the window, hoping to see Magnus one last time. He didn't. But there was someone watching them to leave. The woman watched them leave and when the car disappeared from the view, she turned around and left.

Few hours later they finally arrived to the cabin. Alec jumped out of the car and followed Maia in the small building. It was cosy. Maia took the bedroom and Alec was sleeping in the guest room. There was a small well handled kitchen and a living room with a fire place.

"I like it." Alec couldn't help but to comment when they walked back to the car to get their bags. Maia chuckled. "I am glad you do." They agreed to change at making dinner. Maia was cooking first day, Alec the next one and so on. While Maia started cooking the dinner, Alec went outside to get some wood for the fire.

The cottage was set in beautiful place. The forest was beautiful, green and all flowers blossoming. Alec allowed himself to wander a bit, to be alone for while. To stand somewhere, where it seemed almost same as in 2018. For few minutes he felt home-home again. The forest and near lake reminded him of small village where he was with his family.

 

They used to play hide and seek with his siblings and he truly enjoyed it. Izzy was small at that time, hiding so badly that Alec always found her immediately but he pretended to be still looking for her. He would walk around her, pretending to not see her and she would be chuckling.

Alec missed his sister.

 

When Alec found enough wood, he slowly returned back to the cabin. Maia was almost done with the dinner and Alec set the fire on. Then he prepared the dishes on the table and Maia put the pot on the table. "Mhm," Alec smelled the food, "what is it?" He asked as they both sat to the table. "My grandmother's recipe." Maia said, "Enjoy."

"So not only that you can make drinks but food as well?" Alec teased, "But it's good." He added. Maia raised her eyebrows. "Your food is still better. That's not fair." She joked. "Yeah, everything is better in 2018." Alec laughed, not thinking about the words. Maia wasn't smiling anymore.

"Do you mean it?" Alec frowned, "Do I mean what?" "Is everything better in future?" "Oh," Alec gasped, "I didn't mean it, it was just a joke..." Maia shook her head, "I am not angry Alec, I just wonder how you feel. You never talk about your time anymore..." She said carefully, "I just want to make sure you're okay." Alec nodded, feeling the tears coming to his eyes. He slowly looked up on her. "You can tell me anything Alec. I am not going to be angry." She said kindly and Alec tried to smile but failed.

"Sometimes it's hard. Really hard." He whispered, "Sometimes I wake up and I feel so lost. Like I am in wrong city. He'll, I am in wrong century." He paused, looking for the words, "Sometimes I miss small things, which can seem unimportant, but make so much difference. Sometimes when I am sitting in the office and I look on all the people standing there... I remember that all of them were actually dead already for me. That if I somehow go back to my time, you will be dead. My siblings, my family, for them I am dead. There's no way I will live until 2018." He dried his tears quickly and looked on Maia, who was holding his hand cheerfully.

"But not everything here is bad." He added, taking deep breath and smiled on her. "Not everything is bad." He reassured her, but more like reassured himself. Maia just nodded understandingly. "Some days I just want to get out of there so badly, to run far away, somewhere where it won't remind me that I am here." He chuckled. "Is that why you took me here?" Maia smiled. "Kind of." "Thank you." Alec whispered.

"How about play something?" Maia offered after dinner, "Do you play cards?" Alec nodded. "What are we talking about?" Maia raised her eyebrows and pretended to think. "Poker….?" Alec laughed. "Very well Roberts, game on." he said and Maia went for cards with a grin. "I am gonna beat your ass Lightwood." she said as she came back.

 

When Alec woke up the next morning Maia was still asleep, so he decided to go for a morning run. He changed his clothes and ran out. The path he was running on slowly led him to the lake and all the way around it. It could be about 1O kilometres. Just ten (for Alec). He took the time to clear his head and tried to relax a bit. Usually he used to run with earphones and listen to music. Today he was listening to the sounds of nature, and honestly was surprised how lively it was. Despite the early hour, the animals were already awoken and chirping, running and flying. Alec was lucky and on his way he saw some squirrels, rabbits even a pack of deers. The birds were flying up and down, front and back, left and right. Alec probably haven't ever seen such a harmony. Forests in future were much more emptier, quieter. After all, here was something nicer in 1951 than in 2018.

When he returned to he cabin, Maia was already awake, standing next to the stove, making scrambled eggs. "Morning," he greeted her, "Smells nice." Maia jumped a bit, not noticing him before, "Oh Alec! Hi!" she smiled on him, "Enjoyed the run?" Alec nodded. "It was… really nice." he said. "I just go real quick in the lake and I will join you ok?" "Okay." Maia said, "Don't drown in there!" she called after him, Alec laughed a bit.

After the swim and breakfast they went on a trip, deeper in the forests. As Alec found out, Maia grew up in those forests, spending most of her childhood there. They were walking whole day, pausing only for short breaks and picnic they had on the top of one of the hills that were around the cabin. They talked with Maia a lot, mostly about life. Both of them had some weird experiences and understood each other. Alec remembered his sister. She used to be he one who was talking with him about things such as these. He realized he found himself another sister.

They went on with the week like this, going out on walks and trips, Maia showing Alec around, or they went in the lake to swim, even though Maia said it was too cold for her, Alec also agreed to help Maia to repair her cabin, some holes in the roof and broken things. While working on it, he noticed a barn near the cabin. He asked Maia about it many times and she just said that's a barn and nothing more, but she seemed to hold an untold hate toward it.

Two days before their leave when Alec was working outside again, he noticed the barn. This time he decided to see what's in there. It looked abandoned. When he walked to it, he took the handle, trying to open the huge doors. Something squeaked and slowly the door opened. Alec held his breath. It was dark in the barn, but he was pretty sure that everything inside was destroyed. There was mess. The furniture broken, pieces laying everywhere. Opening the door even more, so the sun shines reached inside, Alec gasped one more time.

The walls were scratched. But it wasn't just innocent scratch. There had to be some huge animal held in there. Probably against its will, trying to escape.

"Alec..." Maia whispered from behind him. Alec turned around and with a shock in his eyes he looked on Maia. "It's okay." The woman whispered. "What is this?" Alec asked, pulling away from Maia. Scared of her. "Is it the thing Magnus warned me about?!" "Alec," Maia said quietly, trying to calm him down, "you don't have to be scared, okay? How about we get back to the cabin and I explain everything to you?" Alec took deep breath before answering her. He looked one more time in the barn and then followed Maia back to the cabin.

As they sat on the couch, Alec was looking on Maia, waiting for the answers. "So you uh... Know about Magnus,...?" She asked him, trying to find the words, "What he is... That he has..." "Magic?" Alec finished for her and the woman nodded. "Are you warlock as well?" He asked, but to his surprise Maia shook her head. "Then what?" He demanded the answer. Maia sighed. "Just remember, it's still me okay?" Maia reassured him, "I am still your friend and what I am doesn't change a thing." Alec had no idea what she was talking about but nodded anyway. Maia was quiet for a while before she spoke up again.

"I am a werewolf." She blurted. Alec's eyes widened. "...a werewolf?" He asked. "Like a wolf person... Do you change?" He suddenly had so much questions. "Every full moon? But I never noticed... I uh.." "Alec!" Maia called him to stop him. Alec silenced. "Sorry, it's just so amazing..." Maia shook her head. "So you're not... Scared?" She asked carefully. Alec looked on her. "I mean... Of course it's weird but.. you're my friend Maia, nothing is going to change that." Maia started crying lightly and Alec pulled her in friendly hug. "It's okay Maia, we're going to be okay." "Yeah." The woman whispered quietly. "Thank you."

Alec didn't know what to say, so they just stayed hugging each other for a bit longer. Suddenly Alec realized something. "Was it you whom they held in the barn?" He asked carefully, not wanting to hurt Maia. The woman pulled away from the hug, drying her tears. "It was me," she agreed, "but it was for my own safety." She explained. "The change is pretty wild. They locked me in there to not hurt others or to not to run away." Alec nodded, trying to absorb all the new informations.

"Just ask." Maia said quietly when she saw the frown on Alec's face. "I can literally hear you thinking. Alec took deep breath. "So how does it work… the change… and all this?" he asked. "Well, when another werewolf scratches you, you start turning, and yeah it kind of hurts, it mostly depends on the mind state you're in. So the more calmer you are, the better the change goes." Maia paused, "I was just a kid, I was freaking out." she confessed, "It was weird, and I had noone to talk to. My parents locked me in there and then they told me to leave." "But… weren't they the one who changed you?" Maia shook her head. "It was our friends son." "And what about him? Couldn't you talk to him?" Maia sighed. "He left, the night he scratched me, he left. We never saw him again." Maia shrugged. "But it's okay now." she smiled sadly, "It gets easier with time." Alec nodded. "But I never noticed… you being werewolf." Maia chuckled, yeah that took me a lot of time and energy to hide it from you, I am so happy I don't have to anymore." Alec smiled on her, but still didn't get his answer. "I have a friend who helped me." she said.

They talked in the late night, but then were forced to go sleep, because they were driving home the next morning and needed their energy.

 

"Do you have like some special sense to find other people like you?" Alec asked, not even knowing he asked aloud. Maia chuckled. "You really are a thinker." She said, "I am surprised I am still not used to it." Alec laughed lightly. A lot of people told him so. "But yeah, Downworlders can see other downworlders." she said. "Downwolders?" Alec frowned. "It's something like humans. We are Downworlders." "Okay." Alec said and looked out of the window meanwhile Maia turned on the radio.

 

When they finally arrived back in the city it was evening already, Alec quickly ran in the apartment and put his bags in his room, running outside again. "I am going to see Magnus!" he shouted on Maia and was gone.

He was so happy to see Magnus again. He haven't talk to him in almost two weeks, and that's if you ask him, too freaking long. He ran almost the whole way over to Magnus' place. He knocked on the door, already smiling and the thought of seeing him again. Noone opened.

"Are you Alec?" someone's voice said and Alec looked around. A man was coming to him. Alec frowned nodding. "Who are you?" he asked. The man walked to him, "I am a friend of Magnus'" he said, "he sent me here to wait for you, he said you will probably be looking for him." Alec's heart started beating faster. Where is Magnus'? What happened?

"Where is Magnus?" he asked him quickly and the man sighed. "There was an accident," he said carefully, looking on Alec, "He is okay, just… they want to make sure he is okay, so he is in hospital for few days." Alec headed toward the main door, planning to leave to hospital, but the man stopped him, catching his forearm. "I'll drive you," he offered, and told Alec to follow him.

What happened to Magnus? How is possible that noone contacted them. He has to get to the hospital. He should have been here. He should have never left with Maia. Maybe if he didn't leave Magnus would be okay…

When they walked outside the building, the man headed straight to the car and Alec was right behind him. Maybe he would notice that something about the man was wrong if he wasn't too distracted by the fact that Magnus was hurt. Before he could realized that he is walking straight in the trap. And when he did. It was too late. Suddenly something slammed him in his head and everything went black.

 

When Alec woke up again, he wasn't in the city anymore.

Someone was dragging him somewhere and Alec couldn't move nor speak.

He looked up and saw the stars shinning.

Orion was brighting strongly that evening.

The stars were the last thing Alec saw before the darkness consumed him again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading :) and sorry not sorry for all the drama ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	19. Alec's diary part 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile I liked to think about stars, he liked to understand them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ I like stars huh

_I always liked stars. Alright, maybe not always, but as long as I can remember, they fascinated me._

_They were so small, so light, but there were so many of them. Every night, when the sun dissapeared behind the horizont they slowly came out._

_The first one was Morning star, which is Venus actually, a planet. And after it, all other stars started slowly appearing on the night sky. Like a small fireflies._

_They would stay up there whole night, until Sun -which is by the way a star as well- came out and outshined them all._

_Stars have a big meaning for me. But when I say that I am interested in stars, it doesn't mean that I care about astronomy or so, no, I like stars because of the psychological meaning. I don't look up on sky and see the Newton's laws. I look up and I see something beautiful that mother nature created all those years ago._

_When I look up on the night sky, I don't see numbers or equations. I see patterns, magnificence._

_I see the beauty in stars because I don't understand them. I don't know what they are, how they work, I can't imagine how far or how big they are, and yet they are so breathtaking. They are shinning only so we can see the light million years later. Some of them maybe already died, but yet, it didn't reach us. Maybe all the stars we see are already dead, but we have to wait another centuries just to find out that they aren't there anymore. We are actually looking in deep history, light from some stars takes so long to travel to our eyes that we see the past. Hubble telescope can look as far as 13 billion years ago._

_People in future will slowly say goodbye to the stars as they will slowly die and one day a humanity will look up on the night sky and there will be nothing but a darkness._

_Humanity is still living in darkness if we put it like this. All observable matter in universe, such as stars and planets make up only a 5% of the universe we know. The rest 95% is made up of invisible dark energy and dark matter. That means, that there's still 95% of the universe we know nothing about yet._

_In our family house I was sleeping in room that was under the roof and I had a huge window opened up on the night sky. Every night I went to bed I could see star constellations shinning on me. Orion was the brightest one._

_I read that old Greeks had stories based on the stars. That they gave the shapes to the constellations and names. Sometimes when I was lying in the bed and was looking out of the window, I used to make my own stories. My own constellations._

_I imagined stories about wars. About heroes. About families. About love._

_I never told people about my passion for stars, but I told Mr. Ba-Li, because he loved them as well._

_The first time I noticed was when he asked me to bring him some book from his bedroom. It was the first time I was in that room. I was amazed. One wall was an enormous library, on the others and on the ceiling were drawn stars, connected in constellations. It was an amazing art. When I asked him about it, he was surprised that I like stars as well and immediately started talking about them._

_As I found out, Mr. Ba-Li adored stars as much as I did, to be honest, he had a little different view on them than I had, but there were so many things I could learn about them from him._

_He looked on stars and understood how they work. He looked up on the night sky and exactly knew what was happening. He wasn't as oblivious to the numbers as I was._

_Meanwhile I liked to think about stars, he liked to understand them._

_He knew all the equations and Newton's laws. He knew everything I only speculated about. He explained some things to me and in return I told him about my thoughts. He always said that it's too much ideas for him to understand, but he listened to them anyway._

_Do you know that there are at least 10 billion trillion stars in the universe? Big number right? That's 10 and 21more zeros to it. Even thought it sounds crazy, there is probably more stars in existence than grains of sand on all of the world's beaches. Crazy, right? And that's not all._

_Let's not forget about Moon, our only natural satellite. This white moon is so different from our planet. Forty seven years ago, eighteen years from now on in my new timeline, the humankind will take its first steps on the moon and the bootprints will probably still be there a million years from now. There's no atmosphere on Moon, not like on Earth, so there's no wind or water to sweeep through and erase those marks. Interesting, isn't it? Something so small that stayed there after our visit, and it will be there for centuries._

_Maybe if we weren't alone in this universe, maybe one day someone will find Moon and land there, finding the traces after us._

_For my eleventh birthday Mr. Ba-Li gave me a book about universe. It was one of the books he had in his library. It was from Tonke Dragt, a dutch write, Torenhoog en mijlenbreed. I loved the book. I would read it over and over enjoying every word of it._

_I found out that it was Mr. Ba-Li's favourite book as well. Sometimes I was surprised how much we had in a common._

_Sometimes I wonder who he is, where is he coming from. I know him so well, but yet I know nothing about him. The more time I spent with him, the more similarities between us I find. We both like stars, we both like old cars… I could go on, but in the other things we don't agree we always manage to make a compromise._

_Can you have a soulmate who's almost a 50 years older?_


	20. Let's go rob a bank

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I am trying to help you Magnus." she whispered in his ear. "I don't need your help." Magnus hissed, trying to move away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *TRY OF RAPE* It's not that detailed but so you know...

Magnus hadn't seen Alec much since the weekend. And things between them... Were fine... Magnus knew he should probably talk to Alec more about what happened with the whole thing about wedding. It wasn't right from him and he knew it.

He told Alec that he chose him and just few hours later he almost married Camille. So if Alec was upset he got every right. Magnus fucked up that one.

He wanted to talk with Alec about it as soon as possible, but this week was living hell. There was some problem at Pandemonium so he needed to go there every day and work on it, and when he finally came home, Alec wasn't there, or he was already asleep.

He planned a nice weekend for them, but then Alec came, telling him he's leaving for whole week. With Maia.

He sighed, but couldn't do anything about it. Alec deserved some free time, and he wanted to be supportive boy-friend (they still hadn't talk about it...) And so he supported the idea and hoped he will enjoy it.

But it wasn't enough, no, they even had to argue on their last day before Alec left. Because Maia didn't tell him she's a freaking werewolf and it wasn't Magnus place to tell him, so Alec got angry on him. Of fucking course.

Magnus sighed again. This week was going to be long.

 

They had some problem with the clients in the bar, because they were breaking the rules. Magnus was merciles toward people breaking them. And they even broke some furniture in the bar. That was enough.

Also Luke stopped by, telling Magnus about the robberies. Alec was right, there was something magical about them, they probably had some warlock who was cleaning all proofs after them. Luke asked Magnus for help and he happily agreed.

Using magic like that, exposing it, those people needed to be punished. Magnus didn't want to even imagine what would have happened if mundanes found out about it. It would be catastrophe. Either they would try to kill them and so start a war, or they would chase them and experiment on them. Any of these options wasn't exactly good for downworlders.

They had to protect themselves. They had to catch the robbers.

In the middle of the week when he was sitting in his office of Pandemonium, someone knocked on the door. He looked up. "Come in." he called. Camille. Magnus froze. The woman entered the office and closed the door behind herself. "Camille," Magnus frowned, "what are you doing here?" he asked. The woman smiled on him, "Lovely to see you too Mags." she said and Magnus growled. "I asked what do you want?"

Camille sighed. "Is this how you treat an old friend?" Magnus shook his head. "We are not friends anymore." he hissed on her. "Oh, still upset on me because I wanted to help you?" she teased him and Magnus came closer to her. "Why. Did. You. Come?" he asked, loosing his patience.

"I came to offer you job." she said and Magnus frowned. "Why would you of all people offer me job?" "Well," Camille walked to the table and sat on it, "I have this well-payed job, but after ou last deal, our warlock left and we kind of need another one… you." Magnus gasped. "So it's you, you are the robbers." Camille nodded. "Are you crazy? Why on earth would I want to join you?" Magnus shouted on her. "Because think of all the money you could get. We could get." "How do you know about me being warlock?" he suddenly frowned. "I never told you."

"Oh Magnus," she sighed, "you are so blind, aren't you?" she chuckled. "One downworlder can recognize another one." Magnus frowned but before he could say anything, Camille hissed and showed Magnus her fangs.  "Fuck." Magnus whispered but before he could move or do anything, Camille got him pressed against the wall.

"I really don't want to do this, but you will join us," she whispered, kissing him against his will, "or I can make sure that someone will take care of Alec." she said and Magnus froze. "Stop it." he growled, "Stop dragging him in this." "Well, you don't give me much of choice, do you?" Magnus tried to pull away from her, but she was strong, pressing his hands against the wall, her legs pressing against Magnus' crotch.

"I am never going to forgive you if something happens to him." Magnus growled, "Leave him alone." Camille sighed again, "You are so stupid Magnus, can't you see what he did to you?" She leaned so close to him, that they were already touching. Magnus tried to pull away from her, but he was trapped. "What are you doing Camille?" he asked, breathing quickly. He was confused, what was happening. Why was she so close? "Leave me alone!" the woman chuckled and shook her head.

"I am trying to help you Magnus." she whispered in his ear. "I don't need your help." Magnus hissed, trying to move away. "You will thank me one day." Camille said as her hand slowly moved down Magnus' chest. Magnus dryly swallowed. "Camille stop." he threatened but the woman was not listening to him. Soon her hand moved to Magnus' pants and slowly unbottoned them. Magnus shook his head trying to freed but his hands weren't working.

"Don't fight it Magnus," the woman whispered, looking straight in his eyes, "you are not freak, I can help you." Magnus felt the tears coming to his eyes. All the bad memories started coming back. He was different. He was a monster. Maybe they were right. Maybe he deserved to be in asylum. He was never going to be like others. He couldn't. He can't have nice things. He doesn't deserve love.

Magnus gasped when Camille's cold hand touched his intimate parts, but he coudln't move. He couldn't shout. He was just standing there, desperate, crying. "Please," he begged her, "don't do it." But the woman wasn't listening to him, instead she started stroking it and Magnus almost choked.

Magnus couldn't understand what was happening around him. He didn't see anything nor hear. His body just stood there, crying for help but his thoughts were far away. Lost in the times when they held him in the asylum.

Suddenly someone banged on the door and shouted Magnus' name. Camille groaned, pulling away her hand and walking away from Magnus.

The man fell down on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, cursing the woman in his thoughts.

"Think about my offer." Camille said as she opened the door and quickly left.

Magnus was still sitting on the floor, curled in himself, crying. Catarina ran immediately to him. "Magnus." She called him, kneeling next to him, carefully touching his arm, "Are you okay? What happened?" But Magnus was too shook to talk. He opened his mouth few times but no words came out. Instead he started crying even more, jumping every time Catarina tried to touch him.

Catarina looked down on his body he was protecting by his arms and saw the unbuttoned trouser. She gasped, finally understanding what happened. "Magnus, love, please talk to me." She urged him, but the man hadn't heard her. Curled, shaking. "I am so sorry." Catarina whispered.

Few minutes later Catarina managed to calm Magnus down and took him back to the apartment. He hasn't said a word the whole time, too lost in his thoughts.

Catarina quickly left to her apartment and got Raphael, telling him to get Ragnor. When she came back, Magnus was silently lying in the bed, watching the other half of it. It was empty. Magnus was empty. "Magnus," Catarina whispered quietly, sitting on the bed next to him, "please tell me what you need." She begged, "please just say something." She had tears in her eyes, but Magnus couldn't make himself to say something. Instead he just continued lying in there, looking nowhere.

He wasn't sure how long they were there, but soon Raphael with Ragnor came. Both man looked on Magnus with shock in their eyes. Catarina took them in the other room and closed the door behind her, so they wouldn't disturb Magnus.

His eyes felt hard. At some point he fell into dreamless sleep.

 

He woke up to the sounds coming from his kitchen, he quickly changed his clothes and entered the other room. He found there Madzie with Rosa, playing with dough.

"Hi Magnusss." Madzie welcomed him with chuckle, "Cat said you're sick so we're making you healing cake." Both girls chuckled as they threw more flavour in the dough.

Sick. That was the only thing Magnus heard. Sick. He was sick. He was a monster. He didn't deserve love. He was nothing. He suddenly felt like throwing up and ran in the bathroom leaning over the toilet bowl.

Someone came to him and Magnus jumped when the person touched his back. "Sorry," Catarina whispered, putting her hand away, "how do you feel?" She asked him, handing him some towel. Magnus dried his mouth, sitting next to the toilet. "Like shit." He whispered, closing his eyes. "Dirty." He said almost inaudible. Catarina sighed, "How about you take shower and then we eat something?" She offered. Magnus took a while to answer.

"Okay." He agreed. The cold shower calmed him down a bit. At least he didn't felt so dirty anymore. At least he couldn't smell Camille on himself. He looked down on his hands. They were still shaking. Something in him switched and he became furious. He punched the bathroom wall and screamed. Both in pain and desperate. He was pushing in the wall until a red stream of blood started flowing down on the wall.

He sat down in the shower, crying. What have he ever done to anyone that he deserved all this? He doesn't deserve this.

When he walked back in the kitchen, both girls were looking on him with sad eyes. Magnus ignored them sitting to the table, next to Catarina. "We made you a healing cake." Madzie whispered, putting it in from of him. Magnus looked on her with a blank look. "Thank you sweet pea." He forced himself to whisper and took a fork, trying the cake. It was horrible. Magnus had what to do to not spit it out immediately. But both girls were looking on him, so he forced himself to eat it. "Hm?" Rosa asked carefully. "It's really good." Magnus answered, looking on Catarina, asking for help.

"Girls, go play somewhere else, I need to talk here with Magnus about something okay?" Both girls nodded and ran out of the room.

Magnus was quiet for while as was Catarina. He wasn't sure what to say. What do you say to your friend who found you after you were... Assaulted?

Magnus sighed. "Don't feel sorry." He said. "I deserved it." Catarina stared at him. "Are you kidding me Magnus?" She shouted on him, "You didn't deserve that, what the hell. Noone does deserve that! She's a bitch and she's going to pay for that!" Magnus was quietly looking on her. "How do you feel?" She asked him after while of awkward silence. "I am okay." Magnus lied. Catarina knew it. "It's okay to not be okay Magnus." She whispered, carefully taking his hand. "You have every right to not be okay." Magnus felt the tears in his eyes. "But what other choice do I have?" He shouted on her, "I can't do nothing about it!"

He was leaving the room when Catarina spoke up again. "You can Magnus, we will help you find her." Magnus turned around and looked on her. "How?" Catarina sighed as she stood up and walked to Magnus. "We talked to Luke and he will help us." Magnus frowned. "Us?" He asked. Catarina nodded, looking down on her hands and back on Magnus. "Me, ...Raphael... Ragnor... And we asked Luke for help." Magnus stared on her.

"Oh great so you just told everyone?!" he spat out. Catarina sighed. "Magnus…" "That's great, just great! Maybe you can just send me to psychiatrist and don't even bother to ask me!" Magnus shouted and left the kitchen. When he entered the living room he saw Madzie and Rosa standing there, looking on him with fear in their eyes. Magnus sighed and left in the bedroom closing the door behind himself.

 

"Magnus?" Someone knocked on the door. Magnus raised his head from the bed. He somehow managed to fall asleep again. The door slowly opened. Raphael.

"Hi." The man quietly greeted him. "Yeah you are sorry, no you can't do anything for me I am fine." Magnus growled on him, "Now when we have the little chit chat you can leave, bye." Raphael sighed. "Magnus I am not here to feel sorry for you. I am here to remind you something." He said as he walked to the bed. "What?" Magnus huffled in the pillow. "I know you think it's okay, that you deserved it and all that, that you think it will be okay eventually... And yeah it gets better with time, but it doesn't mean you have to isolate from us Magnus. We are your friends, we are here for you no matter what, hell we are family even and we are not going anywhere." Raphael paused and Magnus turned around looking on him. "I was there Magnus, I know what you feel. That you want to be okay so badly, because you don't want to be weak. But Magnus, having the courage and talking to us, or whoever else, standing up to it... That's the real strength. And you are one of the strongest people I know." Raphael smiled on him kindly. "Just don't let Camille win, this is what she wants. She wants to break you, but you're stronger."

Magnus felt the tears coming from his eyes. "Why are you doing this?" He asked quietly. "I am just returning the favour." Raphael said, "You have been there when I felt weak and you told me the exact thing. You are not alone. And neither are you." Magnus chuckled but it came out more like sob. "Thank you." Raphael just nodded and without saying anything more he left.

 

He stayed in his room for the rest of the next two days. On the third day he finally decided to go out and talk to Luke. If it was true what Camille said, then Luke and Alec finally had some lead.

Alec. Magnus completely forgot about him. He was still with Maia somewhere far away. He has to make sure Alec doesn't know what happened. What if he doesn't love him anymore? What if he does something that cannot be reverted? He has to talk to his friends.

Magnus took a shower and made some quick breakfast. On his way out he put a note under Catarina's door, telling her he left on the police station. He could have knocked, but that would mean dealing with her and Magnus really hadn't energy for that.

 

When he came on the police station, he noticed that there was more rush than usually. He frowned as he caught one of the officers. "What's happening?" The young man looked at him. "There was another robbery, they killed one of the hostages." Magnus groaned. And to think he almost married that woman....

"Hey Luke!" He called after the man when he finally spotted him in the crowd of people. Luke looked up on him and nodded at him, he excused to whoever he was talking with and walked over to Magnus. "Magnus, what brings you here?" He greeted him. "Lucas, I believe I know who are the robbers." He said and Luke's eyes widened. "Are you serious?" Magnus nodded. "I had.... Rather unpleasant visit few days ago..." He started and Luke sighed, nodding. "I heard..." Magnus suppressed the anger that everyone knew about what happened and instead he spoke up again. "She tried to recruit me in their group." She. Magnus could say her name aloud. Not yet. "She told me they had a warlock in their band, but he left." Luke was thinking about everything Magnus told him. "Do you know something more? Did she say something more?" He asked. Magnus tried to remember but instead he just came back to the moment in the office and things started getting blurry around him. He closed his eyes shut and started breathing quickly.

"Magnus." Luke called him, "Magnus, it's okay, just breath, forget about it." He tried to touch his arm but Magnus flinched, pulling away. Luke brought him a glass of water and waited until he calmed down. "We will find another way to find them." he said then. Magnus looked up on him. "I want to help." he said. "I want to help you to get her in the cell, until she rots." he said angrily. "Are you sure it's good idea?" Luke asked him.

Magnus nodded. "I am your best shot Lucas," he said, "don't forget she offered me to work with her." Luke frowned, "Mag-" "If I agree and get in her robbery group, I might can help you." Luke shook his head. "It's too dangerous, and afterall that she has done?" he pointed out. Magnus sighed. "It's not going to happen," he said, partly reassuring himself, "and I will help you to stop the robberies, murders…"

Luke sighed. Magnus was right. And they had to act quickly, before she could found another warlock. But they needed to make sure, that 1) she won't suspect Magnus, 2) she or anyone else won't hurt him, 3) they have enough evidence. Luke called a meeting and told them about Magnus. They agreed to do it. They filled Magnus in, all the informations he would need, what all they will need from Magnus, and mainly, how to behave to not be revealed. They needed to make sure they could comunicate with him, no matter what happens, without her getting suspicious. Also, none of his friends could know about it. And that includes Alec as well. About that, Magnus thought, he needs to make sure, that his friends won't tell Alec what happened, he wants to tell him on his own conditions.

On the end of the day, they were done. They agreed that Magnus was officially going in. He managed to contact her and agreed to join her. She trusted him and so the game was on. If anyone asked him if he was nervous, he wouldn't know what to say. He was feeling pretty much empty. Tonight was Alec finally coming back. Magnus was so happy to see him, but on the other side, he was nervous about what he will think once he finds out what happens.

He walked back in the apartment and cleaned a bit, before Alec would arrive. He looked on the watch. It was already nearly midnight. Why isn't Alec there? He waited a bit longer but then finally decided to go to his flat.

He knocked on the door and waited. Maia opened it. "Magnus! Hi!" she greeted him. "Hi Maia, is Alec here?" he asked. The woman frowned. "No, we came back about two hours ago and he ran immediately to your flat." she said and Magnus' heart started beating faster. "Um… maybe he went to buy dinner or something for you?" she tried. Magnus shrugged and turned around, running back to his appartment.

He had bad feeling about this. All his fears came true when he entered his flat and found Camille sitting on the couch. "What are you doing here?" he hissed. The feeling of wanting to throw up came back. "I came to plan our another roberry." she said with fake smile. Magnus frowned. "And don't worry, you are going to help us, or you won't see Alec again." she added with rude laugh.

Magnus gasped. Camille had Alec. She kidnapped him. Alec was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SORRY


	21. The robbery part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus frowned. "I am not killing anyone!" The man chuckled. "Do your job well and hopefully you won't have to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part two tomorrow ;) also 4000 hits? Wow guys!

When Alec woke up again, he was lying on bed in small room. He looked around himself, his eyes getting used to the darkness surrounding him. The room was really small, only furniture there was the bed he just woke up on and a small sink.

He groaned, trying to sit on the bed, his head hurt. Probably because of the hit. What did actually happen? Was he kidnapped? By government? Did they found out that he was from 2018 and were they going to kill him? He slowly stood up and walked to the door trying to open them. It was locked. Alec sighed, turning around trying to find anything that could help him. But there were no windows.

Alec groaned, carefully sitting back on the bed. His head was spinning and his eyes were closing. Soon he fell asleep again.

 

~~~

 

They kidnapped Alec and it was Magnus' fault. If he hadn't agreed to join their robbery group Alec would be fine.

Magnus gasped, wide eyes looking on Camille. "You kidnapped him?!" He shouted on her. "Calm down." She said mockingly. "Your _Alexander_ is fine. As long as you do what you agreed to do." Magnus frowned. "You're crazy." He hissed on her. She laughed. "No, I am just careful and making sure everything goes according to the plan." Magnus shook his head. "How do I know he's still alive?" The woman laughed. "You have to believe me." she said as she stood up, Magnus swallowed nervously, "Not that you have another option." she teased him. Magnus walked over the room to make sure he was in safe distance from her.

The woman walked to the door and lifted a bag from there, turning around, looking on Magnus. "Everything you need is in here." she said as she threw the bag in front of her. Change your clothes and meet me in 15 minutes outside."  "Where are we going?" he asked. The woman laughed, "The national bank." she said, opening the door, "Don't make me wait, after all I don't have to remind you, that we are talking about Alec's life here, right?" Magnus growled, but before he could say anything, Camille already closed the door.

He groaned, quickly thinking what's happening. They were supposed to have more time. He needed to talk to Luke, but he didn't even know what was happening. He ran in the office and took out a paper and started writing. He knew Catarina was right now his only chance, no matter what their rules with Luke were, he needed to tell someone. When he finished writing, he quickly changed his clothes and left the apartment. On his way out he threw the letter under Catarina's door, hoping she will read it soon.

He walked out to the car on the last minute. Catarina smiled on him, "Right on time." She said as she pointed him in the car. Magnus sat inside and took deep breath. Luckily the woman sat in the front and Magnus was sitting in the back with his new complics. The car drove out and Magnus looked back on his flat, hoping that Catarina will read it soon enough.

 

They were driving just for few minutes until they arrived to some abandoned building just on the outside of the city.

Everyone got out of the car, took their bags from the car trunk and walked in the building. "Is Alec here?" Magnus couldn't help but to ask. Camille looked at him and rolled her eyes. "I am not an idiot Magnus," she said, "he's not here, but don't worry, if you do your job well, you will see him again." Magnus groaned.

"They will catch you one day," he said, "they will arrest you and put you in jail and I will make sure you will stay there forever. After all you have done. To me. To Alec. Once you are there, you stay there." He threatened but the woman wasn't paying attention to him. "Oh Mags," she sighed, "you still don't see it, do you?" Magnus frowned. "All I have ever done was just to help you. Do you really think it was coincidence we met in Europe?" She chuckled and Magnus froze.

It was lie. It was always one big lie. She never loved him. She just wanted to use him.

"You are a monster and you will pay for it." Magnus hissed. Camille suddenly lost her patience and jumped to Magnus, holding his arm tightly. "Now listen to me you little shit." She growled in his ear and Magnus froze. Remembering what happened the last time she was that close to him. "You are going to do exactly what I tell you or you can say goodbye to your Alexander. Understand?" Magnus pushed his tears away, nodding.

He can't let them to hurt Alec. "What do you want me to do?" He asked quietly and the woman chuckled, leaning away from Magnus, who took deep breath as soon as she became more distant.

"Let's get to the plan, shall we?" She announced as she looked on her companions. Everyone nodded and they moved to the table standing in the middle of the room. Magnus sighed and soon followed them. There was 5 people including him. Magnus looked on the other three man, who were leaning above the table, studying the plans for their next job. Magnus looked on the papers as well. There were some plans of the bank, drawings of the entrances, the guards ways, numbers of guards, all possible exits… it was everything there.

Magnus couldn't help it, but admired the work. The group had really done good job preparing this robbery. And all of them. It was amazing. One of the man noticed Magnus' awe and chuckled. "You ready man?" he asked and Magnus couldn't help but to nod. He adrenalin was slowly rushing in him. "What is my part in this?" he asked. The other man, standing on his left put some paper in front of him. "You are going to open all the locked doors, safes, you even will have to exterminate some witnesses…" Magnus swallowed nervously when he remembered that this group had even murdered innocent people. If he's lucky, he won't have to do so. Not that he would.

He was going to rob a bank, and hopefully won't be arrested. Hopefully he will see Alec again.

 

One day later five random looking people entered the national bank. Magnus was one of them. And he knew that it was not going to be okay. He wasn't sure why, probably because they were robbing a bank that day, but he felt like something much worse was going to happen.

 

~~~

 

When Alec woke up again, he already felt much better. He got up from the bed and started roaming around the room. He again tried opening the door, but it was still closed. There were no windows in the room, or door. The locked one were his only way out. He sighed, sitting on the bed. His stomach wobled. No wonder he was hungry and thirsty, he might wasn't sure how long he was locked there, but it had to be few hours at least.

Alec groaned and walked to the door, banging on it. Someone shouted from behind it and Alec made few steps back from the door. Someone opened it quickly, looking on him. It was the man Alec met before they knocked him out. "You!" He gasped. "Where am I?" He asked and the man chuckled. "You're here as hostage so we can make sure everything goes according to the plan." Alec frowned.

"Here." The man said, throwing him plastic bag. "You have some food in there and water as well." "Are you government?" He couldn't help but to ask. The man laughed. "Hell no. The exact opposite actually." "What day is it?" "Sunday morning." The man said and before Alec could ask any more questions he left.

 

Alec took the bag and opened his food and a bottle of water. It didn't take him too long to start planning an escape. He is a soldier after all. He found a desk and sat to it, finally getting food inside himself. He noticed some papers and pencils laying on the table. They also gave him cutlery. Stupid from them, lucky for Alec.

But before he does anything, he will need his strength. Oh gosh, Magnus must be scared about him. And Maia as well. But what do they want from him? What plan were they talking about? He needs to get out.

 

~~~

 

Catarina woke up as most days early, because Madzie and Rosa were hyperactive kids and were playing and shouting on each other whole morning.

She sighed as she got up from the bed and entered the room. Both girls were jumping on the couches playing the game "floor is lava". She sighed. The whole room was a mess. Pillows laying everywhere on the floor.

Catarina sighed and walked in the kitchen to make her morning coffee. Soon Raphael came from the bakery with some fresh bread. "Morning," he greeted, putting the bags on the table, "here's some letter for you." He said, handing her the letter Magnus quickly wrote yesterday.

Catarina opened it and started reading.

 

_Catarina,_

_Sorry for this letter I don't have much time to explain what's going on, but you have to find Luke and tell him or even better give him this letter he will explain you as much as he can._

 

_Camille came yesterday (Friday evening) in my flat and confessed that she had kidnapped Alec to make sure that I will do what she wants. He was taken as hostage, so she is sure I won't betray her and I can't. It's Alec!_

 

_Whatever you do, do not interfere this robbery, if it means it will threaten Alec's life. I would never forgive myself. Also don't worry about me. Please focus on finding Alec. Please make sure he is okay._

 

_We are leaving somewhere, she already planned another robbery. I don't know where, when or what she wants from me. The only thing I know is that the National bank is the target._

 

_Whatever you do, do not interfere this robbery, if it means it will threaten Alec's life. I have to do this. I can't loose him._

 

_Magnus_

 

Catarina gasped, showing the letter to Raphael and running back to the bedroom to change her clothes. Raphael immediately took his jacket and calmed down the girls, telling them they have to be alone for a little while. As soon as Catarina ran out of the bedroom, fully dressed, both friends ran on the police station to find Luke.

They were lucky the man was standing there next to the evidence board, talking with some officers. "Luke!" Catarina shouted, running to him. "Here!" she forced him the letter from Magnus in his hands.

Luke read it with frown. "Oh no!" he gasped, "Guys!" he shouted on the officers. "We have another problem!" he announced, walking in middle of the room, the letter still in his hands. "Our agent, Mr. Bane, wrote us a message, the robbers contacted him and had taken him somewhere unknown, the target seems to be the National bank, unknown when." he breathed in, "They have also taken another hostage, Mr. Lightwood, our good friend."

"I suggest we split on two groups, one will start looking for Mr. Lightwood, the second one will continue getting ready for another robbery." He nodded on them. "Let's get some work done guys, so we can all go home." The officers split the meeting and started working.

Luke walked back to Catarina with Raphael. "Thank you," he said, giving them back the note, "we will do everything in our powers to get our friends back." "Where is Magnus?" Catarina asked with tears in her eyes, Luke sighed and hinted them to follow him. They entered Luke's office and the man closed he door behind them. "Take a seat." Luke offered them as he himself sat behind the desk.

"Magnus is doing some job for us," look began, "he told me Camille found him, wanting to recruit him for some job, Magnus said that she and her gang are the robbers we are looking for them. So we got him to accept the offer-" "You let him work for that bitch?" Raphael shouted on him, "Have you not heard what she had done to him?" "Raphael," Luke tried to silence him, "it wasn't our idea, it was Magnus'." Catarina gasped. "Why would he do that?" "Because he wanted revenge and he understood that this is the best way to catch them." Catarina sighed. "That's so Magnus." she whispered, drying her tears, "Always putting others in front of himself." Raphael hugged her. "It will be okay," he reassured both of them, "we will find them." Catarina started crying quietly.

 

~~~

 

Magnus tried to focus on the plan, he really did, but there was too much things going on. He had to agree that the plan was really clever. Not that he would ever say that aloud.

This was probably the biggest bank Magnus knew about. Successfully robbing it would be the biggest robbery in the history of robberies. Magnus sighed. He always wanted to be a lot of things, but he never ever imagined he would end up as a robber.

"Magnus?" the woman shouted on him, "Focus!" he looked up and saw her angry face. "Are you listening to me?" Magnus nodded. "Okay, explain him his part." She ordered one of the guys. The man sighed and put another papers in front of them.

"These are the ground plans of the bank." the man explained to Magnus, who leaned closer to get better view on it. "We enter this way," he started showing Magnus, "all of us need to enter such as that they don't connect us together." Magnus nodded.

"You are a warlock, so your job is mostly to cover for us, to clean all the evidence that we have ever been there. If there's anyone trying to stop us, you have to get rid of him." Magnus frowned. "I am not killing anyone!" The man chuckled. "Do your job well and hopefully you won't have to." Magnus shook his head, groaning quietly.

"We will share the money equally, except you," Camille pointed on him, "Your first job, you will get more next time." "There will be no next time." Magnus growled. "You promised to leave Alec alone!" Camille chuckled. "Only if you do what you have to do." "I will." Magnus hissed.

"We are leaving in the morning, get some rest." the woman ordered and the meeting ended.

 

~~~

 

Alec put down the pencil as he finished his another letter for Isabelle. It was time to leave.

He took the knife and fork and slowly walked to the door. He put his ear to the door, listening if there's someone behind it. The only thing he heard was muffled shouting. It sounded like his kidnappers were playing cards.

Alec smiled, one more victory for him. He learned to be happy even from small things. Alec took the cutlery and started working on opening the door.

Serving in the army for few years taught him many things. Such as how to unlock locked things. They used to say, that nothing is truly locked.

After working on the lock for few minutes, Alec  felt how the lock was slowly opening, suddenly he heard footsteps coming to the door. He gasped, backing off from the door, but he was too slow. The man opened it and saw Alec sitting on the floor, knife in his hand. "Fuck." He just heard him murmur and ran to Alec to get the knife from him.

Alec was weaker than the man, after all, he was the hungry and thirsty and kidnapped one. The fight over the knife didn't took long and soon the other men entered the room, seeing Alec and their friend fight.

They pulled them away from each other and pinned Alec against the nearest wall. The man Alec was fighting with then came to him and hit him many times in the stomach. Alec grunted, but he had nowhere to hide.

"Don't you ever try this again." The man proceeded to say "Camille wouldn't be happy if we had to kill you..." and with one final punch they left.

Alec fell down on the floor and started breathing quickly. Hopefully he had no internal injuries.

But Camille... Was it possible? Was she the one that kidnapped him? But why? What does she want?

 

~~~

 

"She wants Magnus and his magic," Luke answered Catarina's question, "me and Alec were thinking that there maybe was some warlock helping them, and Magnus confirmed it, it seems that he left and so they needed a new warlock and Camille decided she wants Magnus' help, using Alec as blackmail to make Magnus cooperate." Catarina sighed.

"Do we have any trace where is Alec... Or Magnus?" She asked with tears in her eyes, Luke shook his head, "Not yet." "I can't loose both my friends." She sobbed.

"Cat!" Ragnor rushed to them, "I got your telegram. What's happening?" he asked, Raphael took breathe in and started explaining everything they knew so far.

"Magnus was assaulted by Camille, who then tried to recruit him for the job, because as we found out, she is behind all the robberies. Unfortunately then she had kidnapped Alec so she has something against Magnus to make him cooperate- Magnus agreed to go undercover to get some evidence against Camille, but the plan got a bit shit, after they left yesterday evening and we found out just few hours later." he breathe quickly and continued talking, "The national bank is their next target, but we don't know when and we have to make sure they don't get suspicious, also we have to find Alec before they can hurt him and stop the robbery…" he breathe out and Ragnor was just standing there in shock.

"Holy shit." he gasped. "Do we have any clue where they are holding Alec?" he asked. Everyone shook their heads.

 

Few hours later Luke came back to the waiting room, where all friends were nervously sitting, pacing around the room. The only voices were coming from two small girls quietly playing on the ground with pencils and some papers.

"We have some update." Luke announced as he entered. Everyone looked up on him. Raphael stood up. "Yes?" he asked. "Not to destroy anyone's expectations, we still don't know where Alec is, but we have found some localities, where he could be, we can try to narrow them down, but it will take some time." "We don't have time" Ragnor argued. "We can't do anything else." Luke explained. "We can help." Raphael offered.

"We are downworlders as well Luke, our abilities can help us." Luke sighed. "They are right." Maia said as she entered the room with some coffees. "We can split up in groups Luke, each of us can go to another locality. We will find him." "Fine!" Luke agreed finally.

Raphael, Ragnor and Maia went with their groups, driving to their localities, looking for Alec. Catarina stayed with Rosa and Madzie on the police station.

All the friends were in different parts of the town, Ragnor's group had a small house on the countryside, Maia and her pack went in the town centre and Raphael's people went to a small cottage in middle of the forests.

Ragnor opened the door of the flat. It was empty and no signs of anyone staying over there any time soon. They decided to look around to see if there were any other leads.

Maia and her friends were running around the city, trying to catch Alec's smell to figure where they could keep him.

Raphael's group managed to find the cottage. It was empty, but they found a signs of fight inside. They must have been close. The group couldn't leave that earlier before them. Raphael focused on his instincts. Alec couldn't be that far away.

 

~~~

 

Alec waited few more minutes, before he took out the fork his kidnappers didn't took away from him and slowly stood up. He grunted, his stomach hurt.

He took the fork and came to the door, working on unlocking them again. Few minutes later he was finally succesful. He carefully opened them and looked in the hall. It was empty. He heard the voices coming from some other room.

Alec wasn't sure where the main door was, but he needed just a window to escape. He walked on the other side than from where he heard his kidnappers to talk. He found only room in there. A bathroom. He carefully closed the door behind himself and walked up to the window.

It wasn't locked. He opened it carefully, climbing outside.

As he jumped out, he couldn't help but to chuckle. Feeling the sun shines on his face again, he would never guess how he would miss it. Freedom.

"Hey!" Someone shouted on him. Alec looked on his left and saw one of his kidnappers smoking outside. He ran to him, knocking him out before he could warn the others, but it was too late. When he heard the door slamming, he started running. He wasn't sure where he was running. He didn't even know where he was. He just needed to get out of here. From them.

 

First he had no problem running before them, he was a soldier after all, but his injuries became a problem soon. His stomach hurt. Someone hit him from the back and Alec fell on the ground. He managed to stand up and fight back. Soon the other man joined them and started attacking Alec as well. He stood no chance against them.

He saw a strong food laying in the grass next to him, he reached for it and hit both man. As they were surprised by the push, Alec used the distraction and started running.

 Alec wasn't sure how long he was running, but soon his legs stopped working. He was stumbling over the roots, until he tripped and fell down on the cold ground.

 

Someone ran to him. Alec prepared to attack, but before he could do anything the man standing before him suddenly disappeared, appearing few metres next to him, fighting one of the kidnappers. Alec was so tired and his eyes were slowly closing, but he was sure it was Raphael. And he was sure that he was moving impossibly quickly.

He saw as his friend knocked the two kidnappers and soon was followed by man dressed in uniforms- officers. Raphael ran to him. "Hi." Alec whispered, chuckling that he was finally safe again. "Hi." he smiled on him "Thanks." Raphael nodded. "What are you? … Werewolf?" Alec asked from his last strength. Raphael laughed.

"I am a vampire." he confessed and Alec gasped. "But you're on sun…" he pointed out, before the darkness surrounded him.

 

To be continued very soon... Don't you worry :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Your comments and kudos mean really lot!! So please and thanks :)


	22. The robbery part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Magnus woke up in he morning, it took him a while to remember where he was. He sighed when he did. Today was the day.  
> Today he was helping to rob a bank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go! A second part of this story! Hope you enjoy it :)

When Alec woke up again, he was lying on the back seats of a car. Raphael was sitting in front of him and talking to the police officer who was driving. Alec looked up from the window and saw that they were already back in the city.

The next time Alec woke up was when the car stopped moving. He opened his eyes slowly, looking outside. They were standing in front of the police station. Raphael looked back on Alec and smiled kindly. "How about we get you something to eat and drink?" he offered and Alec nodded thankfully.

"Alec!" Catarina shouted when she saw him entering the building and rant o him, hugging him tightly. "I was so worried!" she cried. Alec suddenly felt the tears coming to his eyes. He was back. He was home. He was safe. The tears were falling down by his cheeks. "I am sorry." he whispered, tightening the grip. "It's okay."

"Alec why are you crying?" Madzie asked him innocently. "I am just happy to see you." he whispered, pulling from the hug and leaning down to hug Madzie. "I am happy to see you too Alec." she said with smile and Alec chuckled lightly. Then he walked to Ragnor whose group came few minutes after them.

"Alec." the man chuckled as he saw him. "I am glad you are okay." "Yeah." Alec whispered. "You are not getting rid of me that easily." Ragnor laughed. Some officer brought Alec something to eat and drink. He sat to the closest table and started eating. He didn't even realize how hungry he really was.

"Oh my god Alec!" Maia ran to him and hugged him, "You scared me Lightwood don't do that again!" "I am sorry." "Don't you dare to apologize." she chuckled but it came out more like sob. Suddenly Alec realized someone was missing.

"Where is Magnus?" he asked and everyone around him froze. "What?" he asked, but noone has said anything. "Where. Is. Magnus?" he asked again, louder. Catarina started crying. Alec started breathing quickly, his heart was pounding fast. Did they kidnap him as well? What happened? Is he still alive?

"Where is he?" he shouted and all women in the room jumped at the sound. Raphael walked to him and carefully put his hand on Alec's shoulder. "He's working with Camille." he said. Alec frowned. "What are you talking about?" "Camille kidnapped you, because she needed Magnus to do some job for her." Raphael started explaining, "She needed a warlock and Magnus is one, so she threatened him, then Magnus went in as an inside man, but something went off, and now we only know they are going to rob a National bank someday soon.

Alec was listening to all of it. It sounded unbelievable. Camille? Again? Seriously what was the woman's problem?

"Well we need to go there and stop them!" Alec argued.

 

~~~

 

When Magnus woke up in he morning, it took him a while to remember where he was. He sighed when he did. Today was the day.

Today he was helping to rob a bank.

After quick breakfast and one last review, they sat in the car and drove on the place of robbery. They split up and each of them entered the bank alone, making sure they won't be connected.

Honestly Magnus was scared. He knew that he wasn't a real robber and that he was forced in this whole thing, but they could still arrest him, right? And if they arrest them… Alec will never make it back. Camille will let him die. Alone. And their last conversation was actually an argument.

Alec will never know how much he means to Magnus. He never got the time to make things right. He fucked up everything.

 

When he entered the bank, everything suddenly became a blur. He wasn't able to focus on anything. He was looking around himself but didn't see anything. He was listening to people talking around him but didn't hear anything. He wasn't nervous or scared.

He was empty.

When Camille, the last of their group entered the bank, the plan officially began. On one side Magnus really hoped for Luke and the police to show up, on the other side, he couldn't endanger Alec.

He sighed as he walked to one of the guards of the bank and smiled on him kindly. "Excuse me sir, could you please help me?" He asked and the man looked at him. "Sure," he nodded, "what do you need?" "Could you please tell me where can I find the headmaster of this bank?" "Unfortunately I am afraid you can't meet him unless you have an arranged meeting..." Magnus nodded. "I do, but my orientation sense is very bad and I can't figure where to go, so if you were so kind..." The guard nodded. "Sorry, of course sir." He said as he walked to the stairs.

Magnus looked behind himself and found Camille in the crowd. The woman just nodded at him, following them soon after they left.

 

~~~

 

"Alec you're not going anywhere!" Camille said as she stood in front of him. Alec groaned. "She's right Alec," Ragnor back her up "you need to get some rest." "We need to make sure you are safe, so Camille has nothing against Magnus." Luke said.

Alec sighed. They were right, if Magnus was doing all of it just because Camille kidnapped Alec, then he had to stay safe, to make sure that Magnus could get out of the mess alright. "Can you hurry up?" he begged. "To make sure Magnus doesn't do anything stupid?" he took a breath in, "That Camille doesn't hurt him?" Luke nodded.

"Our people are already on the way to the bank." he assured him. " Go home, get some sleep, I will send some my people with you so you will be safe." Alec frowned. He didn't like the idea of not being there with Magnus, but it wasn't like that he had some other option.

"I will go with you Alec." Catarina offered, "the girls are probably tired as well." she pointed on Madzie with Rosa. "Okay." Alec whispered quietly. "We will go with Luke and make sure Magnus is okay, alright?" Maia with Raphael told him, Alec nodded as he followed Catarina.

Few minutes later they arrived in Magnus' flat. Catarina and the girls stayed in the kitchen and living room, meanwhile Alec went to get a shower and then lied to the bed. Two police officers were standing in front of the door.

As Alec lied in the bed, he found out that he can't fall asleep no matter how hard he tries. He couldn't stop thinking about Magnus. What have they done to Camille hat she was hurting them such so? Well… okay they kind of left her on the ceremony, but that still was no excuse for kidnapping and blackmailing.

 

~~~

 

So far Magnus hadn't had to kill anyone and he was so glad for it. This whole thing was so wrong already. He just hoped that Alec will be okay.

The group of five people unobserved entered the bank's safe. As they walked in, all of them gasped. There was so much money. Walls full of boxes with valuables. Taking all this and selling it… they will never have to work again.

Magnus chuckled for himself. He never had problem with money. To be honest, he was very well situated. But still… this amount of money. Wow.

"Okay, enough of sightseeing, start working!" Camille shouted on the men. Everyone opened their bags and started putting the money and valuables in. Magnus had to pinch himself few times to make sure he isn't just dreaming. Of course he knew Camille was great planner, but still… shouldn't it be _harder_ to actually rob a bank?

He probably zoned out, because Camille walked to him and hit him in the shoulder to get his attention. "Get back to work." she hissed. "We still have Alec." she reminded him and Magnus stifftened. "Don't you dare to hurt him." he growled on her. "I won't have to if you just do your job." Camille shouted on him and Magnus turned away from her, putting more money in the bag.

 

When they had filled all the bags and pockets, the group slowly started walking back. They couldn't leave the main exit, but Camille took care of it. She found a back door, that led to small streets where their car was waiting.

Magnus put the bag on his back and in each of his hand another bags as his complics did. All of them then headed toward the back door. Something was wrong. Magnus could feel it. Was it already too late to save Alec? Oh god, Magnus hoped that not.

As they were quickly walking toward the door, the alarm sounded through the whole building. Magnus panicked. He waved his hand to silence it, but it was too late. Suddenly the officers ran behind them, chasing them.

Magnus started cursing internally. Fuck, this was not supposed to happen. He cannot let Camille hurt Alec! This can't be happening. Nooo!

 

Someone jumped on Magnus, pushing the bags away from him and pressing him against the nearest wall. Magnus grunted. "Let me go." He begged. He needs to get to Alec. He needs to find Alec. "I can't." the man said. Luke. Magnus turned around to look at him, to make sure it's him. "You have to let us go!" he shouted on him, but Luke shook his head, "She will hurt Alec!" he cried, "Luke please, I can't loose him."

"Magnus," Luke spoke up quietly, "It's okay, he's okay." Magnus tried to pull away from Luke, but wasn't strong enough, "He's not okay, he's kidnapped, she will kill him." "He's with us Magnus," Luke said quietly, so the other robbers hadn't heard him, "He's home waiting for you."

Magnus suddenly calmed a bit. "He's with… you found him?" he asked, his voice trembled. "Yeah, he is safe." Magnus chuckled but it came out more like a sob. "Thank you." he whispered, as Luke dragged him outside the bank, still in handcuffs, so noone would accuse him of working for police. They may have Camille arrested but still they can't break Magnus' pretense.

 

Everything was blur. Magnus was sitting in the car. Crying. Until he couldn't cry anymore. Then he just sat there. Blank looking. It was over. He did it. Alec is alright. He is alright. They did it.

The car took him on the police station and Luke dragged him in the interrogation room. Here they asked him many things they needed to know. About the plan. People Magnus was working with. Camille. And Magnus told them. He told them everything they wanted to know. He wasn't sure how long they were sitting there. He couldn't find himself to care. The only thing he wanted was to go home and be with Alec.

He missed Alec. And to think that he almost lost him… After few hours of interrogation later they finally let him go. Raphael and Ragnor were waiting there for him. He smiled on them tiredly and hugged them. They kept asking him some questions, but he didn't understand them. "I just want to go home." he whispered and they happily obliged.

Luke got them an escorted car and officer to go with them and all friends drove home. When they finally reached the apartment, Magnus noticed another police car standing in front of the building.

There were another two officers standing in front of his flat. They nodded on them and let them inside. He was surprised by Maia, Catarina and two small girls playing in his living room.

"Magnus!" Catarina whispered as she ran to him, hugging him tightly. "I am so tired Cat." Magnus sobbed as he hugged his friend. "I am sorry." But Catarina shook her head. "Don't be sorry." she said as she pulled away smiling on him.

"Alec is sleeping in your room." she told him and Magnus nodded, leaving the room.

 

Magnus walked in the bedroom and saw Alec lying still. He couldn't help but to smile as he saw his man, being safe. Magnus slowly came to the bed and put off his clothes, climbing in the bed in just his boxers. He snuggled closer to Alec who slowly turned around.

"Magnus." he whispered as he opened his eyes. "Hi." Magnus chuckled quietly, seeing Alec's beautiful eyes was something he never wanted to forget. "Hi." He hugged him tightly. "I am so sorry." he whispered, hiding his head in the crotch of Alec's. "I missed you." "I missed you too."

Magnus looked up on Alec. "I am sorry we argued before you left." he said quietly, Alec shook his head, but before he could say anything, Magnus put his finger on Alec's mouth to silence him, "I uh… when I found out that Camille kidnapped you… I was so scared," "So was I." Alec whispered with tears in his eyes.

"I love you Alexander." Magnus said, before he could change his mind. Alec chuckled almost inaudibly, but hasn't said anything for few seconds, just looking on Magnus. "I love you too Magnus." he finally said it back and Magnus leaned closer to him to kiss him. He could feel Alec smiling in it.

"How about we get some rest now?" Alec asked, "I couldn't sleep without you." he confessed quietly and Magnus smiled. "Me neither." he whispered as he put his head on Alec's chest and let his hand fall around Alec's body.

Soon both men were asleep in warming embrace and Catarina smiled as she closed the door and let them rest.

 

~~~

 

When Alec woke up, he jumped a bit, not remembering where he was. He looked on his side and saw Magnus sleeping pressed to him. He calmed a bit as he smiled and moved a little bit, so he could look on Magnus.

He shifted, so he was lying closer to Magnus and his hand wandered in Magnus' hair, brushing it carefully, playing with it. The older man murmured something before slowly opening his eyes. "Morning." He smiled. "Morning." Alec answered as he leaned closer and hugged him.

"We are okay." Magnus whispered and Alec nodded, "We are." Both of them chuckled, pulling away from the hug so they could look on each other. "That was weird few days." Alec joked and Magnus smiled on him kindly. "I was so scared Alec. That I will never get to see you again." He stroked Alec's cheek. "How did they managed to find you?" He asked. "I escaped the cabin where they held me, but if it weren't for Raphael…" he paused, "Raphael is a vampire!" he said shocked as he remembered. Magnus didn't say anything. "And Maia is werewolf…" Alec thought about it.

"Are you okay?" Magnus asked carefully, "It must be a lot to take." Alec frowned. "It's not that bad actually." he realized. "I mean you are a warlock and I travelled in time." he chuckled, "I don't think anything can surprise me anymore." Both men chuckled and Magnus kissed him quickly.

"And you are okay?" Alec asked quietly. Magnus nodded. "I am now."

 

They managed to take shower and get dressed few minutes later, going in the kitchen. Magnus agreed to make some toasts for them, meanwhile Alec took the plates and put them on the dinning table. Here he noticed the letter.

"Hey Magnus!" he called after the older man. "You have a letter here from…" he looked on the handwriting, "Catarina." "Can you read it?" Magnus asked him and Alec smiled.

 

_Dear Magnus (and Alec, I know you are reading as well),_

_I thought you could use some rest and isolation from us, so I went back to my flat, but feel free to come visit me. Anyway you don't have to worry, there is still one police car standing in front of our building, just in case._

_This car is also waiting for you there, Luke stood by and told me that they would like you to come back on the police station because of some more interrogation, but everyone understands if you don't feel like it._

_Take your time and I hope you are feeling better,_

_Love Catarina_

 

Both men smiled. "She is a good friend you know?" Magnus nodded as he brought the toasts in the dinning room and both men sat to the table.

"Do you want to go there?" Magnus asked as they started eating and Alec looked up on him. He saw the tiredness and fear in his eyes. "Do _you_ want to?" He asked, making sure that Magnus won' agree to it under pressure. Magnus shrugged. "I don't know… I mean… I am not sure." "It's okay Magnus." Alec whispered, taking his hand in Alec's own. "I will be there with you." Alec offered him a smile. "If you want to go there, I will come with you."

Magnus nodded. "Can we just…. Have a normal breakfast?" he begged, "I just want to forget about it for a little longer." Alec chuckled. "As long as you need." "So how was your week with Maia?" Magnus changed the topic.

"It was really nice, it's beautiful place Magnus, we had a lot of fun…" Alec paused to také a sip of the coffee, "And I found out that Maia is werewolf…" Magnus laughed quietly. "Yeah, you may be here already one year, but there's still so much you don't know." Alec frowned.

Magnus was right. It was already almost an year he was there. And he actually tried to not think about it as much anymore. Everything gets better with time, he thought for himself.

"Oh tell me about it." He said, "what about you Magnus?" He asked. Magnus froze a bit and forced a smile. "Not much, just work in Pandemonium and then... You know..." Alec frowned. Magnus wasn't telling him something, but Alec didn't want to push him. He was through a lot and unless like Alec he wasn't trained to deal with these kind of situations. Alec just nodded. They will talk about it another time.

 

Few hours after they woke up they finally arrived at the police station. Everyone was looking on them. Alec took Magnus' hand to show him he is still there, but the older man quickly pulled away from him and made even more space between them. Alec's heart ached, but before he could say anything, Luke walked to them.

"Alec. Magnus." He greeted then, "I am glad to see that you are both alright and thank you for coming." "Of course." Alec smiled on him and looked on Magnus who was avoiding his gaze.

"Can we... Um Alec I was hoping we could talk in private." Luke asked him and Alec frowned. "Sure." He said, without looking on Magnus. The older man apparently didn't want to speak to him and so he decided to give him some space.

 

When they entered the office, Alec carefully closed the door behind them. Luke sighed. "We... Found this." He said, throwing folded paper on his desk. "In the cabin." He continued, Alec wasn't quite sure where this was heading.

"I read it, I didn't know you wrote until I finished it." Oh. It was his letter to Isabelle. Shit. "I am sorry I didn't want to invade your privacy." Alec forced a smile. "No problem." Luke nodded. "I just thought you might want it back." He said, handing it to him. "Thank you." Alec said quietly.

As he wanted to leave, Luke spoke up again. "Alec?" He called after him. The young man turned around. "Yeah?" "I just hope that.. you can talk to someone you know..." He said quietly, "you can talk to me if you want... I just... Don't hold it in yourself." Alec nodded, thinking about his words. "It's okay Luke. Thanks."

His partner nodded and then both of them left the office. Alec his the paper in his pocket to hide it from others eyes. It was letter for Isabelle. It was personal. As they returned, Magnus wasn't there. Alec frowned. "Have you seen Magnus?" He asked Luke, but he shook his head.

Weird.

 

~~~

 

Magnus knew he should tell Alec about the assault but he felt so dirty about it. He was scared that Alec won't like him anymore. Who knows what else. He just simply wasn't risking it yet.

And when they walked on the precinct, Alec tried to intertwine their hands but Magnus quickly distanced from him. Not that he didn't want to touch him, he just felt so fragile. So vulnerable. He knew it hurt Alec, but he needed his time. And he needed to talk to Camille.

If he was supposed to move on, he needed to finish some things. To talk out some problems. And it all began and ended with Camille.

So when Alec left with Luke in his office, Magnus used his chance and went to find Camille.

Since everyone knew him, it wasn't a big problem for Magnus to find her. She was in the interrogation room. Magnus took deep breathe, looked around himself making sure noone is watching him and entered the room.

"Magnus!" The woman greeted him. He frowned as he sat in front of her. "How did you get here?" She asked him, pointing out her handcuffed hands. Before Magnus could have answered, she chuckled. "Of course," she force smiled on him, "you were working for the feds, weren't you?" She spat out and Magnus actually calmed down a bit.

She had nothing on him. He was the one with police. She couldn't harm him anymore. "What? Upset?" He teased and the woman frowned. "If you came to beg for Alec, you're not gonna succeed." She said and Magnus shook his head. "Alec is okay, they found him." He said. "You have nothing on me." The woman forced smile.

"I am not done with you." She growled. "I promised you to get you arrested and I will make sure you stay there." Camille shook her head. "After all I have done for you, you are so stupid Magnus." Magnus suddenly felt the anger in himself. "After all you have done for me?" He shouted. "You mean assaulting me?! Kidnapping Alec?! Forcing me in a robbery?!" He kicked the table. "Don't tell me you didn't enjoy it when I touched you." Camille tried but Magnus interrupted her. "You are a monster Camille and I regret meeting you." "I just tried to help you!" She called after him, but he wasn't listening to her.  

"You have never done anything good for me and I am so so glad you will die here." He said louder. The woman shook her head. "You can't leave me here." She cried after him, as he was leaving the room. "Magnus you have to help me to get out of here!" "Watch me." He said coldly and closed the door behind himself. He was so angry and distraught that he didn't notice a man standing behind the glass, listening to their whole conversation.

 

As he walked out of the interrogation room, he looked around, trying to find Alec. Unsuccessfully. Instead he found Luke. "Hey Luke, have you seen Alec?" The man looked at him, "Yeah, he left few seconds ago, but he said he will come later for interrogation, so we would like to start with you, if that's okay...?" Magnus frowned. Was Alec really upset on him? "Okay, the earlier we start, the earlier I can go." He cheered himself and followed Luke.

He hadn't seen Alec for the rest of the day. In the evening he decided to go to visit Catarina, if Alec isn't there. He wasn't. But Raphael and Ragnor with Maia were. Magnus smiled on them and asked if anyone had seen Alec.

Noone has. "What happened?" Maia asked. "I think he might be angry on me?" Magnus said, Catarina frowned. "Did you already tell him about the assault?" she asked carefully. "Not yet." he sighed. "And you won't as well!" he looked on his friends, "I want to tell Alec myself on my own terms." "Tell me what?" a voice from behind him said.

Magnus turned around. "Alec!" where have you been?" he asked, wanting to hug him, but the younger man was keeping his distance. "Sorry," Alec smiled kindly, "I just needed to clear my head so I went for a walk." He lied. Magnus could sense it.

Raphael broke the awkward silence. "Anyone hungry?" he asked. Everyone nodded. "Let's go to Jade Wolfs." They left the apartment and Magnus with Alec stayed behind. "You okay?" Magnus asked quietly. "I will be." Alec smiled on him as he caressed Magnus' shoulder shortly. "I will be." he whispered as he followed his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who was the stranger behind the glass? I have an idea :/ Please don't hate me and let me know what you think :)


	23. Dear Isabelle 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One year Izzy, one long year, can you believe it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I was gone, and I have bad news :( From now on you will have to wait until I write the chapter (I will try 1chapter per week, but you know me :D ) because I already posted everything I have written so far! The real fun begins, I have so much planned!!! <3

_My dear Isabelle, my dearest Izzy,_

_It has been a while._

_It has been much longer than I care to admit or that I want to admit. One year Izzy, one long year, can you believe it? I remember how I loved you and trusted you to guide me every step of the road I took. You never gave up on me. And I feel I somehow let you down._

_Every day, I feel like I have so much I want to tell you and yet I feel like I have nothing to say, that I have said it all. I know time is running short, and I want to say everything, everything and everything._

_I am typing up this letter because I know how messy my writing is and I don’t want you to have to try to decipher my writing._

_I remember the one time I was hospitalized and you were the one with me through it all. You visited me, you were here for me when I was scared and hurting. No one else in the family ever came to see me, but you came every day. You were there for me when noone else was._

_When we would go to war, to field, even when they split up us, you were there with me. Maybe not physically, but mentally sure. Always when we went in the field and I was alone, I used to write you letters. I wrote you so many letters during those years and yet you never got to read them. I don't know why I never told you about it._

_It just helped me, to not feel alone. To not feel scared. I wrote you what I was doing and where I was, talking to you, pretending that we were together for a bit while longer. I am not sure why, but every single time I came back, I burned all the letters I wrote._

_Maybe I just didn't want you to see this part of me. The weak one. The scared one. I was your big brother and it was my job to be brave. When the others couldn't be. And I tried._

_But right now I am scared. I am so scared Izzy. They kidnapped me and they are holding me in some small room and I don't know what to do. I suddenly feel so hopeless. I don't know who kidnapped me or why. They surprised me. They caught me out of guard. Unprepared._

_I don't know how long I am here. How many days it is since I disappeared. It's actually funny when I think about it… This is already the second time I disappeared from someone's life's._

_Maybe… maybe I am back in 21st century?_

_Could that be possible? Am I back? Can I see you again? I really want to Isabelle. I want to go home. I don't want to be here anymore. I miss you, my family, my job. I never asked to be sent here._

_You were the one that always dreamed of being married and having a large family. I never saw myself as married and from the beginning I never wanted kids. You babysat when you were old enough to. I buried my head in a book and kept away from most kids. You had no interest in cooking, I have cooked since an early age and have always loved it._

_So many differences between us, yet we always got along and I miss that so much. I miss you._

_When we were kids we comforted each other through the bad times. We laughed at stupid things. We argued over silliness. But we were always close._

_Who knows, maybe I was right from the very beginning. Maybe I was truly sent here as punishment? Since I came here, I have no peace. One tragedy following another one. Why me? Izzy I can't help it but to ask myself, why me?_

_……_

_They were here. It's the man who kidnapped me. Did he travel in time as well? I don't think so. I am afraid I am still stuck in 1951. I am sorry._

_I don't think I am getting out of here any time soon._

_I want to go home back to you Izzy, I promised you to always come back and here I am unable to do anything._

_I miss you so much Izzy. This is longer than ever before. Whenever they held me as a hostage, whenever they kidnapped me… I was never that scared. I always knew that you and Jace were out there, that you would never stop looking for me. But now? I am alone Izzy. I have noone here. I may die here and they won't even look for me. Maybe in few years someone will find my dead body but I will be just another John Doe. You will never find out what happened._

_So this letter is for you Isabelle, my dear sister, my only sister. You may never get a chance to read it. But it will be here, written on this small peace of paper, floating around. So maybe one day you can capture it, read it and know how much your big brother loves you and wishes only the best for you, as you deserve only the best._

_Every night before I close my eyes,   I pray that I will dream of you, that I can be with you._

_All my love,_

_Alec_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, you can find me on
> 
>  
> 
> [Tumblr](https://annie4m.tumblr.com)


	24. Two idiots in love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I am sorry." he whispered, putting his arms around Alec, but the younger man shrugged them off, not saying anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here I am with another chapter, hope you enjoy it :))

After the dinner the group said it's goodbyes and they split. Ragnor chuckled, not tired enough and left to another bar, dragging Catarina with him. Raphael sighed and took both girls and all three of them slowly headed home. And Alec… Alec took Maia and they both quickly left. Before Magnus could say anything, Alec was gone. The man sighed and joined Catarina with Ragnor going drinking with them.

 

It was quiet walk home. Alec was thinking a lot and Maia figured that it wasn't worth trying to get Alec talking when he was so far in his thoughts, so she just walked next to him, making sure no car will hit him. One can never know what Alec decides to do when he's angry.

And Alec was angry. He was furious. After all that happened the only thing he wanted was honesty. Was it too much to ask?

 

When they finally walked back to their apartment, Alec fell down in his bed and buried his head in the pillow. "Okay," Maia sighed, looking on her best friend, "spill it." she said as she sat on the bed next to him.

"Iamfine." Alec groaned in the pillow. "No, you are not." Maia demanded. "It's alright Alec. You don't have to be okay, but you have to talk to me." Alec raised his head. 

 

"I am just angry." He said as he turned around so he was lying on his back. Maia lied next to him with sigh. "I am angry on Camille and Magnus and..." He groaned. "So I take it Magnus already told you?" Maia unsurely asked. Alec kept looking on the ceiling. "That's the problem. He didn't." Maia frowned. "Then who?" She asked.

Alec sighed. "Magnus but he doesn't even know it." "How do you mean it?" "When we were on the police station Luke wanted to talk to me alone and when I came back Magnus wasn't here anymore..." He quickly looked on Maia and then back in the ceiling. "So I went looking for him when I found out that they still had Camille in interrogation room, so I walked there, just behind the glass to see how it is going and..." He paused, "to my surprise it was Magnus who was there with her and they were talking about _it."_

"Maybe he just needs some time to tell you...?" Maia tried and Alec shrugged. "You know about it as well..." "Yeah... They told me." "See? Everyone knows except me." Maia sighed as she looked on Alec. "Don't take it that personally Alec." Maia whispered. "He probably just wanted to tell you on his own terms when he's ready." Alec shook his head. "But why? Why can he tell Catarina or all of you but it is so hard for him to tell me?" "Maybe because he is scared how you will react." Alec groaned. "Why does all this keep happening to me?" Maia frowned on him, not understanding what is her friend talking about.

"I am sorry for scaring you." Alec whispered after few minutes of silence. Maia took his hand in her own and pressed it lightly. "It's okay, I am just happy you are alright." "Yeah…" _I am fine…_ Alec thought. _I will be fine._

 

~~~

 

Magnus was going to regret this the next morning. Drinking with Ragnor and Catarina could never end up well. It was already dawning when he was slowly walking home. He immediately went in the bed and fell asleep quickly.

When Magnus woke up in the noon, his head was spinning and hurting. He regretted it. He groaned as he got up from the bed and walked in the kitchen to make himself some water. He could just conjure it, but he was too tired. And he still vividly remembered when he tried doing that the last time he had hungover. It didn't end up well. He somehow managed to conjure a whole cow instead of that glass of milk he was longing for.

It sounds funny, but try to be hangover and figuring out from where did that cow come and sending her back. Not funny. It took Magnus whole day and until now he still doesn't know if the cow is back where she belonged.

So no magic when drunk and hungover.

When he had drink enough water he went back to bed and slept some more. Few hours later he decided that was enough sleeping and got up. The apartment was mess. Magnus sighed and started cleaning. It was actually nice to do some housework by hands. Not that he did it often, but yeah, sometimes he enjoyed it.

When he was done, it was already evening and the only thing Magnus wanted to do, was to take that ice cream he had in his freezer, sit on the couch with Alec on his side and forget about their problems for a while.

 

His plans were unfortunately disturbed by light knock on the door. Magnus groaned slowly pacing to it, opening it.

Alec.

"Alexander." Magnus whispered. "Hi." The younger man whispered as he raised his hand, showing Magnus what he brought. An ice-cream. Magnus chuckled as the tears came to his eyes. "I thought you maybe would itch some ice cream." He said unsurely. Magnus hugged him tightly, before the younger man could see his tears. "Thank you." He whispered quietly.

They were standing in between the door for few minutes before Magnus finally pulled away.

"Let's eat it before it melts." He offered as he took Alec's hand and led him in he apartment. Alec put the ice cream box on the small table in front of the couch and walked in the kitchen to take spoons. Meanwhile Magnus went in the bedroom to bring some blanket. Both men met again on the couch, Magnus putting a blanket over them and Alec handing him a spoon. They opened the box and started eating.

"Why do we keep pushing each other away?" Alec asked guiltily after while, not looking on Magnus and taking another spoon of ice cream. Magnus looked on Alec and sighed. "Probably because we are both idiots." Both men chuckled lightly. "Yeah... That would make sense." Magnus shifted a bit so he could lean closer to Alec and put his head on Alec's shoulder.

They spent the rest of the night sitting on the couch, eating ice cream and talking about something. Magnus wasn't even sure what they were talking about but it didn't really matter. As long as he was sitting there with Alec, things were good.

But Alec was thinking about something. That thing about Alec was, that Magnus could read him very easily. Like an open book. And when he was thinking, Magnus could almost hear him. But he didn't dare to ask. He was too scared of the answer.

Eventually both of them fell asleep. On the couch. Too comfortable than to walk in the bed. Alec was lying on the couch and Magnus was half lying on Alec and half on the couch as well, his arm around Alec's body, head resting on Alec's chest.

 

~~~

 

As Alec woke up in the morning, he felt someone pressed against him. Magnus. He was still sleeping there. Both of them fell asleep on the couch. Alec chuckled and looked on is watch. Shit.

He was late for work.

Alec carefully pulled away from Magnus and took his jacket, running to the work without even taking breakfast. He ran in the building and made himself a coffee and stole some donuts from his colleagues, not that they saw him. Just as he sat to his desk, Luke walked out from his office and headed to him.

"Alec, hey, you okay?" He asked him protectively. Alec nodded. "Yeah sorry I am late, I just spent the night at Magnus' and we both fell asleep." Luke raised his eyebrows. "Okay... But that still doesn't explain what you are doing here." Alec frowned. "I work here...?"

Luke chuckled. "Yeah but we have you week off Alec, they kidnapped you, you are allowed to take a break." Alec shook his head. "I need to work." "Alec…-" "Luke please, I just need to get back to normal." _And avoid Magnus until he decides to talk to me._ Luke sighed. "Are you sure?" he asked. Alec nodded. "Very well, as you think." Luke gave up persuading Alec and handed him a file. "Read it and we are leaving in 15 minutes." He announced. "Thank you."

 

They had another case of murder. It wasn't quite on normal daily base, but sometimes it happened. Alec sighed, looking through the informations. The victim was an older rich woman, now they just needed to find out which of her snobbish relative has been the murderer.

It definitely was easier to be a murderer in 1951, Alec thought, not so much cameras, no phones, no pictures, the only thing the detectives had to work with were the witnesses. And that could be fun as well, especially, when each of them had described the suspect differently. Maybe it was easier for murderers to kill, but more harder for detectives to find out the truth.

But Alec always loved challenge. Now don't get him wrong, of course he feels bad for the dead people, he just likes to bring the justice, finding the murderers. But to be honest, he was far away from someone like Hercule Poirot for example.

 

~~~

 

Magnus sighed. Catarina was right. Catarina was always fucking right. And Magnus hated it. Of course he had to talk to Alec. He knew it. But it's always easier said than done. That wasn't about if Magnus trusts Alec or not. He trusts Alec, he really does. After all he even showed him his magic. But Camille trying to "make him healthy again" … that was just different. Magnus was scared. That Alec would be angry. That maybe Alec wouldn't want him anymore. Magnus really tried to not overthink the whole situation- overthinking is Alec's thing after all- but he just couldn't stop.

He went to Alec's and Maia's flat, expecting Alec to be there. To his surprise the younger man decided to go to work anyway. Maia was the one who opened the door and invited Magnus inside. She offered him a cup of tea and both of them sat to the table.

"How is it that we are not talking so much anymore?" She asked as she took a sip of her tea. Magnus looked at her and shrugged. "I guess we both found our other priorities." He said ashamedly. "Yeah." Maia sighed. "But partying with you was always fun." Both of them smiled.

 

"How are things with Alec?" She asked. Magnus figured that it was only a polite question, because since Maia was living with Alec, she surely already knew everything. "I am trying." He said, "We both are." Maia nodded. "He cares about you a lot, you know?" Maia told him and Magnus looked up on her. "I care a out him as well... But it must have been so easy for him... Everything..." Maia frowned. "He grew up in society where they accepted him for whom he loved. I never had that." Maia shook her head.

 

"Magnus you idiot, do you feel like that any of us doesn't support you two guys?" She asked him and Magnus' heart ached. "We have always been there for you. Supporting you. And we are happy for you." Magnus tried to smile. "I know the outside world is cruel but as long as you are here, never ever forget that we all love you and support you, okay?" Magnus pushed his tears away and took Maia's hand in his owns. "Thank you Roberts." He whispered. "Did I tell you ever that you actually have something nice in you?" Maia chuckled. "Not often enough." She teased.

"Well I have to get going now," Maia excused few minutes later, "the bar won't open itself." Magnus nodded. "I'll wait for Alec here if it isn't a problem." "Not at all!" Maia smiled on him and she was gone.

Magnus cleaned his cup of tea and walked in Alec's room. It was cleaned. As always. Magnus very soon understood that Alec is a kind of person who likes to have things in order and everything under control. Just the air in there was unbreathable.

Magnus walked to the window and opened it. Soon the fresh air filled the whole room, but what Magnus didn't expect, was the air draught, which winnowed the papers laying on the table. As soon as he saw them flying away he reached for them, putting them back on the table and weighting them down. He couldn't help but to look what was written on them. They were letters. Letters for Isabelle.

 

Magnus took them and started reading. They were personal, Magnus was aware, but there were some things that caught his eye.

 

 

_In the beginning I thought that it was a punishment for me. That the universe was punishing me for all the evil I have done. For all the people I killed._

 

...

 

_But not everything here is easy._ _I have done something I am not proud of. One night I went in the park and I tried to jump. I just wanted to jump back in our time, I wasn't even thinking what could've happen if it didn't work. I could've die. I could've been paralyzed. But I didn't care at that moment Izzy, I am ashamed to say so, but I was ready to die._

 

_..._

 

_I have nothing Izzy. I have nothing. Every memory of you I had. Every picture. You aren't even born. I can't do anything. I can't look at you again. I can't talk to you. I can't hug you. The only thing I have are my memories. But they are slowly fading away as well. I am already an year here and so much things changed. I am not the man you knew. The Alec you knew, your brother, I am afraid is gone._

 

_..._

 

_But I am scared now Izzy. It seems he doesn't trust me. Why wouldn't he then tell me? Why didn't he come to me and talk to me about it? Instead he decided to pretend that everything is okay and threw away his own happiness for mine._

 

_..._

 

_Who knows, maybe I was right from the very beginning. Maybe I was truly sent here as punishment? Since I came here, I have no peace. One tragedy following another one. Why me? Izzy I can't help it but to ask myself, why me?_

 

...

 

 

Magnus cried. He had no idea Alec was feeling like this. He should have seen it. He should have noticed. What kind of friend he was if he didn't see it?

He was crying and sobbing so long that he didn't notice when someone entered the room. "Magnus?" He heard Alec's worried voice. He gasped, letting go of the letters, turning around to face Alec. The younger man looked exhausted. The letters fell on the floor. "Are you okay?" Alec asked as he reached down for the papers.

"That's..." He recognised them. "Did you read them?" He asked, sounding so harshly. Magnus blinked few times, pushing the tears away.

"Did you?!" Alec shouted on him and Magnus jumped a bit.

"Why didn't you tell me you feel like that Alec?" Magnus whined, drawing his tears. "I thought you were happy here. With me." he cried. "I gave you everything I have Alexander, I gave you home! I gave you my love! Is that nothing for you? That you just keep wanting to go home?!" he shouted on him. "You had no right to read my letters!" Alec shouted back.

"Is it that bad to be here? Do you hate us so much?" Magnus was suddenly angry, "Why didn't you just tell me then? That I am just some toy you play with because you are so annoyed here!" That was low. Magnus knew it. But he was angry.

Alec chuckled mockingly. "You want to be honest?" he spat out. "Okay! Then why the fuck didn't you tell me about Camille?" he shouted and every drop of Magnus' blood froze. "Why didn't you tell me what she had done to you?" Alec shook his head.

"Who told you?" he asked, suddenly feeling truly broken. "Noone did!" Alec shouted on him again. "And that's the problem! If I fucking wasn't in the interrogation room I would never know." Magnus was still standing there, unable to move nor say anything.

"Just leave me alone Magnus!" he shouted on the older man, still holding the letters in his hand. "You don't understand anything! You don't know what it feels like to be here!" Magnus scoffed.

"You have no idea how it feels to have life somewhere and then loose it!" The younger man cried a little bit. He put the letters on the table next to Magnus and lied in the bed, facing away from Magnus.

Magnus could hear him cry. It was quiet crying, but it was there. Magnus dried his eyes quickly, taking deep breath.

Alec was right. Magnus had no idea what it felt like. He didn't understand what Alec was going through and he didn't even asked him if he was okay. He never cared about Alec's previous life anymore.

Magnus put his pride away and slowly laid on the bed next to Alec. The younger man tried to pull away from him, wiping his tears away, but Magnus didn't let him.

"I am sorry." he whispered, putting his arms around Alec, but the younger man shrugged them off, not saying anything. Magnus sighed and shifted closer to Alec, spooning him tightly.

"Magnus," Alec whispered, "leave me alone." Magnus was heartbroken, because hurting Alec was something he never wanted to do, but even thought, still kept doing it again and again.

"You told me relationships take effort." he said quietly, "I am not leaving until we talk this out." he whispered as he pressed a small kiss in Alec's hair. "You are not getting rid of me that easily." he tried to joke as he snuggled even closer to Alec and closed his eyes.

"Sleep." Magnus whispered kindly. "We will talk about it tomorrow." he pressed another kiss in Alec's hair.

"I love you." he said, but Alec didn't say it back. The younger man was already asleep.

 

~~~

 

When Alec woke up in the morning he immediately remembered yesterday argument with Magnus. He hadn't open his eyes yet, bu he knew that Magnus was lying in the bed, next to him, sleeping in Alec's embrace, or more like, Alec in Magnus' embrace.

He didn't want to broke the quiet morning. He didn't want to open his eyes and deal with the reality. He didn't want to argue with Magnus.

Alec pretended to be asleep for few more minutes, until he couldn't anymore. Magnus probably already figured that the younger man was awake by now.

Alec opened his eyes and was looking straight in the golden ones, already watching him. They were looking on each other for few minutes, not breaking the silence. Not yet.

"I am sorry how I reacted about the thing with Camille." Alec whispered, carefully watching Magnus, waiting for some response.

"I am sorry I went through your things." Magnus whispered back.

There was another silence, before Magnus broke it.

"I am sorry I went through your personal things, it wasn't right and I am sorry." Magnus started. "I am sorry I didn't tell you about _the thing_ , because I was scared." Magnus shook his head, "I don't really know why, I just… I guess I was scared that…" Magnus chuckled nervously, "I don't even know, I probably just wanted to be okay, so I pretended that everything was okay."

Alec didn't say anything, looking on the older man.

Magnus waited a while for Alec to say something, but when he didn't, he continued. "I am sorry you feel the way you feel, I am, and will try to make your life here happier Alexander, I promise I will… I know that we both and especially me, are idiots, but I really want us to work out and I am going to do everything in my power to be so."

Alec blinked away the tears coming to his eyes. This man.

"I understand that I simply cannot take you back to your time, or bring your siblings here, but I want you to be happy." When Alec hasn't said anything again, Magnus sighed a bit and carefully took Alec's hand, intertwining their fingers.

"I really don't like all the universe thinking, but there's something my mother used to tell me, when we were travelling. She used to tell me that _No matter where I am, no mater with whom I am, I can always look up on the sky, because the stars I look up to, are the same everyone else does."_ Magnus looked on Alec.

"I believe that your sister is standing somewhere there, looking up on the stars and thinking about you." Magnus whispered carefully.

 

"I don't hate it here." Alec whispered after while of silence. "Sometimes it's hard, because everything I have known is gone, but I think I already somehow accepted it. I accepted that I am here now, and I don't mind." he continued speaking quietly.

"And meeting you," he chuckled lightly, "Magnus, meeting you is one of he best things that happened in my life." he said with tears in his eyes, "And don't you ever doubt that. I would never regret meeting you."

"But you have to start talking to me, okay?" Alec said and Magnus nodded. "I am sorry and I promise." Alec smiled on him.

And Magnus smiled back. "We are idiots, aren't we?" "Yeah," Alec chuckled, "we are."

Magnus leaned closer to Alec. "I love you." "I love you too." Alec kissed him. It wasn't some angry kiss, nor passionate. It was just a kiss full of love, reassuring both men, that they wanted this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So let me know what you think, and don't worry, things will be now very good for Magnus and Alec for next few chapters ;)


	25. You and I are the same

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He probably shouldn't be so excited about this whole thing, but how often do you meet someone who is like you? A vampire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! A new character in the story! Hope you like it!

After quick breakfast Alec kissed Magnus on cheek and went to work. They still had the unresolved murders they needed to work on.

He walked in the police building and walked in the small kitchen to make some coffee. With a coffee in his hand he sat to his desk and opened the file from he murders. As he was sitting there and drinking his coffee, someone suddenly took the files from his hands.

Alec looked up and saw Luke, who looked terrified. He handed him another files. "We got another case." he said. Alec frowned. "But what about the murders?" he asked. Luke shook his head, "We need to do this one." "Why?"

"Because they accused my friend." Luke said, "I know Simon my whole life, he is not a murderer." Alec nodded. Very well then.

"What's the case?" he asked as he followed  Luke back to his office. Here the older man stopped and looked around, closing the door behind them.

"Alec I need you to be the primal investigator, since it's too personal for me." Alec swallowed. That was big. That was almost a promotion.

"Simon is like my son Alec, you have to understand." Luke began and Alec nodded. "We found some murders and Simon's mother called us, shouting that her son is a monster, who tried to kill his sister." Alec frowned.

"We found him, but he keeps telling us, that he cannot explain what's happening, but that he is not a murderer." Luke sighed. "We found a rat blood on his clothes." Alec was still frowning, trying to figure things out.

"A rat blood?" he asked, unsurely writing this information on their black evidence board. Luke shrugged, evidently as confused as Alec.

"How about we go talk to him once again?" Alec offered and Luke sighed. "Hey Luke," Alec walked to him, "it will be okay, we will get him out." he promised, not exactly sure, if it's a promise he can keep.

 

Both men walked in the interrogation room, where was already sitting a young man. Simon. "Simon, this is my friend Alec," Luke introduced them, "Alec, Simon." Both men nodded.

"So Simon," Alec sat in front of him, knowing he will have to be the one to interrogate him, "can you please tell us what you have been doing yesterday from circa 17 o'clock until the rest of night, till your arrest?"

The young man swallowed nervously and nodded after while. "Yeah sure, so I was at home just playing on my guitar and then this crazy woman came in our house and she started threatening us, and she wanted to hurt my sister and my mother and then my mother started shouting on me. She said that I am… that I am not her son anymore.."

Alec was shocked. How could he speak so quickly. Was he even breathing? As Alec tought about it, Simon took deep breathe and stared talking again.

"I was upset right? So I ran out of the house and I don't even know where I was running, somewhere in the dark streets and when I finally stopped there was this hissing and the rat jumped on me like.." he started showing them how, he put his hands in front of him and started shaking.

"Arrhgg, and I tried to pushe her off me like that," he throw his hands away, "but she kept jumping back on me so I took a wood I found and hit her and that's how this," he pointed on his t-shirt, "happened."

 

Both men were watching Simon with shock in their eyes. He was talking for five minutes straight without pausing. When they left the interrogation room Alec shook a bit. "He's always like this." Luke informed him.

"Okay, So what do we do?" Alec asked. But it was more like rhetorical question. "We should find this woman that threatened Simon, do we know anything about her?"

Luke opened his notes and started reading. "Female, around 20s, blonde hair, her name is Heidi..." "Any ideas why she was after Simon?" Alec asked. "No," Luke shook his head, "maybe jealousy?" "You don't threaten someone's family out of jealousy..." Alec thought aloud.

"There has to be something we are missing." He sighed. "I am going to talk to Simon." Alec announced, "Maybe just wait here, okay?" "Okay."  Alec walked back in the interrogation room.

 

~~~

 

When Magnus and Alec separated, Magnus headed back to his flat. He took it the longer way around, stopping at the local bakery, buying something for breakfast and Catarina with the girls. As he finally walked back in the flat, he knocked on the door and Catarina opened him.

"Good morning." she smiled on him, "Where have you been?" she asked him, worried because of his tired eyes. "At Alec's," Magnus said quietly, "he knows." he added and without invitation entered the apartment.

Before Catarina could interrogate him, Madzie ran to him. "Magnus!" she shouted, hugging him. "Hi sweet pea." Magnus smiled on her. "Where is Rosa and Raphael?" he asked. Just as he said it, both siblings came out of one of the rooms.

Rosa had red eyes from crying, but as she saw Magnus she smiled and ran to him. "Hello Rosa, look what I bought." he said kindly, raising his hand with bags. "CAKE!" Both girls shouted at the same time. Raphael chuckled and when Rosa took the cakes from Magnus and ran together with Madzie to the table, he walked over to Magnus.

"Hi," Magnus greeted him, "everything okay?" he asked as he looked on Rosa and back on Raphael. The younger man nodded. "It's just… I … we talked about something…" At that moment Catarina walked to them and reassuringly nodded on Raphael.

"I was thinking about moving out, starting school again." Raphael began and Magnus gasped, "But I figured that it's better for Rosa if she stays here…" he said, looking on Magnus, trying to figure him out, "…what do you think?" he asked him after a moment of silence.

Magnus let out the breathe he didn't even know was holding. He chuckled. "I am so proud of you Raphael." he smiled, hugging him tightly. "You have my support no matter what!" Both man cried a little bit.

When Magnus pulled away from the hug, he dried his tears, laughing quietly. "Sorry," he chuckled, "I just can't believe my brother is leaving." Raphael smiled, "I am not leaving you, I will be still here. I have to. For Rosa." Catarina nodded as she hugged him as well.

"I am happy to have her here Raphael, don't worry, we will be okay." All three of them smiled. The moment was interrupted by Madzie shouting if anyone wants a cake as well.

Magnus loved moments like these. When they were sitting around the table, talking about everything, but nothing. When they laughed at something silly Madzie said or Rosa did. He loved the mood around them. The love. Being family.

 

After the breakfast Magnus agreed to take the girls to park, so Catarina could have some free time and talk with Raphael about the situation more.

"Hey Magnus?" Raphael walked to him just as he was leaving with the girls outside, "Yes?" Magnus turned around looking on Raphael. "I would like to tell Alec myself…" Magnus smiled. "Of course, he is at work,… actually if you go there, could you give him something from me?" Magnus asked and Raphael frowned. "…sure?"

 

~~~

 

As Alec walked out of the interrogation room, he faced Luke again. "So?" his friend asked him and Alec shrugged. "I don't think he did it, but there's just something that isn't adding up…" Luke frowned. "What do you mean?" he asked.

Alec shook his head as he sat to his desk. "Something about his story is weird, I mean, we talked to his mother and she just keeps saying that Simon is monster who tried to kill them with his crazy girlfriend and we couldn't talk to his sister, since she's still sleeping.

Luke sighed. "It just doesn't seem like Simon at all!" he groaned and Alec nodded, "I believe you Luke, but we need something."

At that moment Alec looked up and saw Raphael walking to them. He stood up. "Hi Raphael," he asked quickly, already worried, "is everything okay?" Raphael smiled on him and nodded. "Hello Alec, I am sorry for scaring you, I just brought you this, it's from Magnus and I hoped we could talk?"

Luke left them alone. Alec took the gift from Raphael and opened it quickly. It was a box of chocolates. "Did Magnus blackmail you in bringing this?" he joked and Raphael chuckled. "No, I actually wanted to talk to you… if you don't have too much going on?"

Alec smiled on him, "Of course we can talk, but you know it, being detective is thankless job." Raphael nodded and looked on the board behind Alec. "Is this all you got?" he asked, Alec nodded and moved next to Raphael so both of them were looking on their evidence board.

Suddenly Raphael frowned. "You got any lead?" Alec shook his head. "We don't think it was Simon." he said and pointed on the picture of the boy. "Luke knows him and he says that Simon behaves weird lately." "Oh…" Raphael thought. "Well I have to go now!" he suddenly quickly excused as he ran away.

"What about the talk?" Alec called after him, but the young man was gone.

 

~~~

 

Raphael knew what was going on immediately. As soon as he looked on the board and saw the description of Heidi, he understood what was happening. Of course he needed to make sure first. It was long time, since he last saw someone like Simon. And it all pointed to it. The harm of his sister, the rat blood, the fake story Simon made up.

He quickly said goodbye to Alec and ran out of the room. He looked around and found the interrogation room, carefully coming in, making sure noone saw him.

Here he saw the young boy sitting on the chair, his head hidden in his arms. "Simon?" He spoke up quietly as he entered.

The boy suddenly jerked away, running in the furthest corner, hiding away from Raphael. "Hey it's okay. I am here to help."

The boy looked up. And gosh, he was cute. But now wasn't the right time. Raphael sat in front of him. "My name is Raphael." He introduced. "Go away!" The boy shouted, "I don't want to hurt you!" Raphael frowned. Was it that bad? "It's okay, you won't." He said calmly. "And if you tell me the truth I may can help you okay?" Simon frowned, desperation in his eyes. "I keep telling you all again and again." He cried.

Raphael sighed. "I know Simon, but I am not a police. I am like you." He said and used his improved senses to make sure noone was behind the glass listening to them.

"I am a vampire Simon," he whispered, "and I think you are one as well, aren't you?" Simon was just shocked looking on him. "It's okay Simon, I want to help you." Raphael reassured him.

"Please let me help you." He said, hoping the boy will listen to him. "How... God do you know." Simon finally spoke up, confused. "All the signs are there..." Raphael shrugged, "I mean... The rat didn't attack you, did it? I think you were just hungry..."

Simon was looking on him and Raphael could see that he indeed was hungry. "Here," he sighed as he reached for something in his pocket, "this should help you for while." He said as he threw a sack of blood on the table in front of Simon.

Simon looked on him with disbelievingly look. Raphael nodded. "It's yours, it's alright." Simon didn't wait any longer and took the sack, drinking the blood quickly.

Raphael patiently waited until Simon finished and then spoke up again. "You will be okay Simon, I promised." He said, "But I need something from you..." Simon frowned. "You have to tell Luke and Alec the truth, okay?" Simon shook his head in fear. "Hey, hey," Raphael called him, "it's okay, they are like us, they know about vampires and it's okay."

"So they won't kill me?" Simon asked carefully and Raphael shook his head. "No, but you have to tell them, so they can make sure they find the right person okay?" Simon nodded.

"How about I go for them and meanwhile you talk, I bring you more blood?" Simon hasn't said anything and Raphael walked to the door, to get Alec and Luke.

"Thank you." Simon blurted behind him and Raphael turned around smiling on him. "You are very welcome _querido._ " Darling. And he was gone.

 

He walked back on the station and found Alec, quickly telling him what happened and sending him in the interrogation room. Then he found Luke and send him in as well.

The next stop was Catarina's flat where he had his blood supplies. Hopefully they will figure it out. Simon was sweet boy. He doesn't deserve that.

 

~~~

 

"Okay Simon," Alec spoke up as he entered the room together with Luke, "tell us everything, again, but now the truth. You don't have to be scared, we don't care what you are, okay?"

Luke looked on the boy and nodded. "Simon you are like my son, and you being vampire changes nothing, do you understand me? Nothing." Simon cried a bit.

"But my mother... She... Oh gosh and I hurt Rebecca..." "Simon," Alec interrupted him, "Rebecca is going to be fine, how about we go to her later? We will figure something out, but now we need to catch Heidi." Simon calmed down a bit and nodded. "So she's the one murdering them all?" Luke sighed and nodded.

"From the beginning..." Alec insisted.

 

"Well, so this woman came to me once and she seemed nice, she said her name is Heidi and we went out few times. She was nice girl and it was fun... But then one night... She bite me... I thought it was just some link you know? But it hurt... And she left the marks on me... So it's understandable that I avoided her since then... But something changed and I felt different... I can't be on sun anymore. Oh shit... What am I going to do?! Fuck...." "Simon," Luke put his hand on Simon's shoulder to calm him down, "she came to our house and she tied my sister and my mother and she told me that if I don't bite of them she will kill them both.... And then she cut Rebecca and I was so hungry... I couldn't help myself... Oh gosh I never wanted to hurt her..."

"She will be okay, don't worry." Luke reassured him. "Anything that could help us to find Heidi?" Alec asked and Simon thought for while.

"Actually there is." He said finally. "She said she was hiding in some huge basements..." Alec nodded. At least something.

"Okay, that was amazing Simon, now we have some lead finally," he nodded and looked on Luke and back on Simon, "we will move you somewhere so you're away from the eyes and sun, okay?" Simon nodded.

And Alec left the room leaving Luke behind.

 

He sighed as he walked to his desk and looked around on the board. He wrote some more information when he felt as someone brushed his back lightly.

Magnus.

He turned around and forced himself to smile on him. "Magnus." He greeted. "Hi. Is everything okay?" He asked. Magnus smiled back, "Hello Alexander, I just wanted to see you " the younger man chuckled.

"Is now bad time to invite you out?" Magnus asked carefully. Alec frowned. Wait what? "I am sorry Magnus, we have this crazy case and..." "It's okay darling, how about I come later and we can go?" "O..Okay.." Alec agreed still not sure what was happening.

Magnus touched his shoulder lightly and smiled once again. "Lovely, I will see you soon." He cheered and walked away.

Alec frowned. "And where are we going?" He shouted after him. "That's a surprise!" Magnus laughed and wink on him. Then he was gone.

Alec was in shock. Since when did Magnus touch him in public. Or call him darling? Or wink at him?!

 

"Alec? Alec!" Someone called on him and Alec quickly came back to reality, Luke was standing there with some papers in his hands.

"We have a list of locations where Heidi could be." Alec nodded, "Okay," he said, "Raphael should come back soon, he will look after Simon, make sure everything is okay." Luke sighed. "Are you okay?" Alec asked and Luke rolled his eyes. "Yeah." Alec walked closer to him.

"Hey Luke, I know it can be a lot to také in and I believe you didn't want this life for Simon, but he will be okay, alright?" The older man nodded. "Let's get Heidi so we can let Simon go." Both men got their groups ready and left.

 

~~~

 

Raphael ran in the flat and without thinking went in his room for the blood. He had his own fridge, so Catarine wouldn't have to look on the blood sacks every time she was making food for others.

He took all types of blood since he wasn't sure which one Simon prefer. He probably shouldn't be so excited about this whole thing, but how often do you meet someone who is like you? A vampire.

He ran quickly back to the police station where Simon was already waiting for him. The officer standing in front of the interrogation room let him in.

 

"Hi." Raphael chuckled as he entered. Simon looked up at him. "Hi." he smiled shyly. "Okay so I brought you something!" Raphael announced as he sat to the table. "Here." he put the blood sacks in front of Simon who just stared at them.  "What are these?" he asked.

"I wasn't sure what kind of blood you like so I took all of them so you can try them all." Simon frowned. "You are weird." he chuckled and Raphael laughed. "Yeah, that's me." Simon shook his head.

"Oh and here," Raphael announced as he quickly walked to Simon and shot something in his neck. "Ouch!" Simon squeaked out. "What was that?" he shouted on him, "Are you trying to kill me?" Raphael scoffed. "Not at all. You will thank me."

 "So which type do we start? A+, A-, B, 0, AB…" Simon quietly read all the kinds.

"Whatever you want." he smiled on him. "Which one you like the most?" Simon asked him. "A+" Raphael confessed. "A+ it is." Simon opened it. "Cheers!" they clanked their sacks as they both drank a bit of each sack.

 

"So how did you became a vampire?" Simon asked at one point of their conversation. Raphael found it extremely easy to talk to Simon. "That's a long story." he tried to avoid the topic, but Simon was firm. "I have a lot of time… I just.. You know my story… so it's kind of fair?"

Raphael nodded, Simon got a point. "I uh… I am from really bad family, and my parents used to abuse me and uh… one day it was especially bad, and my warlock friend couldn't help me so he begged a vampire to  turn me." Raphael chuckled at the thought what Magnus told him, "He told me that it was easier to beg a vampire, because the change is easier than a change into werewolf." Simon laughed a bit. "That was nice of him."

"Yeah.. It was." Raphael nodded, "But there are still things coming with it." he sighed. "You age slower. Everyone around you passes away eventually. You have to make sure mundanes don't find out the truth about you…" "How about sun? Isn't that like the biggest problem?" Simon asked.

Raphael shook his head. "Do you remember the injection I gave you earlier?" Simon nodded. "It was an angel blood. It helps us to walk on sun. Some of us. So it's kind of secret." "Then why are you telling me all of this?" Simon frowned. Raphael shrugged. "I guess I trust you." Simon smiled. Raphael noticed the slight blush on his cheeks.

He was cute.

 

"I have nowhere to go." Simon suddenly sighed. Raphael knew that it was bad idea, but since he had nowhere else to go, he blurted it out before he could change his thoughts. "You can move in with me." here it was. He said it. Simon shoot him a look. "I was just thinking about moving out by myself… and paying rent together would be easier…"

Simon thought about it for while.

"And we can have together blood fridge." he joked. Simon laughed, but didn't gave him any answer.

 

Few hours later someone came in the interrogation room just to find both of them to be talking about some comic books. "Guys." Alec greeted them, Luke standing behind him. "We got her so Simon is free to go."

The younger man gasped and laughed. Raphael stood up as Simon hugged Alec. "Thank you." he said as he hugged Luke as well. Raphael walked to Alec and smiled on him. "Thank you." Alec whispered, "if it weren't for you, we could have been here for so much longer…" Raphael just nodded. "I am glad I could help." "Do you still want to talk?" Alec asked, suddenly remembering why Raphael came in first place.

"It will wait, I bet you have so much paperwork to do." he joked and Alec chuckled. "Okay."

 

When they released Simon, Raphael was already waiting for him. "Ready to go?" he asked and Simon nodded. They went to the hospital, because Simon wanted to see his sister and mother one last time.

"Simon, I know this could sound harsh, but there is a way to make them forget…" Raphael said quietly. Simon looked up on him. "What?" "I can make them to forget what happened… if you want." Simon swallowed as he thought about it.

"Okay." he whispered. "Can I just see them before… you do the your thing?" Raphael nodded and left, to give Simon some space.

 

When they left the hospital Simon was quiet. Raphael wasn't sure what to do, so he just lead them back to the police station, since Simon was staying with Luke for few days.

"Goodnight Simon." he whispered, before he turned around and headed home. "Raphael?" Simon shouted after him.

Raphael looked on him. "Were you serious about the moving in?" he asked and Raphael nodded. "Thank you and goodnight Raphael." he said and Raphael left.

 

~~~

 

"Well hello there." Magnus greeted as he surprised Alec from behind. The younger man turned around and smiled. "Magnus!"

"So, another case solved?" Magnus asked looking on the board. Alec nodded. "Yes." "So now you are free?" Alec chuckled. "Yes." "Then we should go." he said as he pushed him out of the police station. "Where are we going?" Alec asked as he sat in the car.

"It's a surprise!" Magnus chuckled, "Also I need you to take this. To not destroy the surprise." he handed him a blindfold. Alec shook his head as he put it on.

They were driving for few minutes, until they finally stopped. Manus helped Alec out of the car and led him somewhere. Then he finally put down the blindfold.

 

Alec blinked few times, getting used to the light. They were standing in small empty street. He looked on Magnus and back on the building in front of them.

_The Blue Oyster._ Alec chuckled. He knew that name. He knew that bar. Alec looked on Magnus who was already nervously looking on him. "You know what this place is, right?" Alec asked and Magnus nodded. "A bar..." He said unsurely. "A _gay_ bar." Alec whispered loud enough for Magnus to hear it.

The older man nodded again, blushing hardly and Alec chuckled, stroking his cheek kindly. "I thought.. I owe you a date and... It's just... I mean we can go there together... And it's not weird... But if you don't want to..." Magnus was stuttering. Alec chuckled seeing him how nervous he was. "Magnus " he interrupted him, carefully taking his hand and kissing it on the back of his hand. "It's amazing idea." He said quietly as he let go of the hand and walked closer to the door.

Here he turned around as Magnus quickly jumped to him and took his hand, intertwining their fingers. Alec could see how nervous he was. 'Are you sure?' his eyes asked Magnus and the older man nodded clutching Alec's hand.

Alec opened the bar door and they entered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really really want to explore the relationship between Saphael (don't hate me please), so Malec has DATE what do you think????


	26. A date it is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You know what this place is, right?" Alec asked and Magnus nodded. "A bar..." He said unsurely. "A gay bar." Alec whispered loud enough for Magnus to hear it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for posting late, A) I had school trip, B) it took me some time to write this, you know me, all for drama, you know how hard it is to write something romantic for change?? I tried :D ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ enjoy :)

_Alec blinked few times, getting used to the light. They were standing in small empty street. He looked on Magnus and back on the building in front of them._

_The Blue Oyster. Alec chuckled. He knew that name. He knew that bar. Alec looked on Magnus who was already nervously looking on him. "You know what this place is, right?" Alec asked and Magnus nodded. "A bar..." He said unsurely. "A gay bar." Alec whispered loud enough for Magnus to hear it._

_The older man nodded again, blushing hardly and Alec chuckled, stroking his cheek kindly. "I thought.. I owe you a date and... It's just... I mean we can go there together... And it's not weird... But if you don't want to..." Magnus was stuttering. Alec chuckled seeing him how nervous he was. "Magnus " he interrupted him, carefully taking his hand and kissing it on the back of his it. "It's amazing idea." He said quietly as he let go of the hand and walked closer to the door._

_Here he turned around as Magnus quickly jumped to him and took his hand, intertwining their fingers. Alec could see how nervous he was. 'Are you sure?' his eyes asked Magnus and the older man nodded clutching Alec's hand._

_Alec opened the bar door and they entered._

 

A loud music was playing inside, Alec wasn't sure what song it was, but it sounded nice. Alec entered the bar first, Magnus right behind him, still holding Alec's hand. He clutched his hand firmly, to calm him down a bit, or at least try to.

Many men who were already standing in the bar looked their way, checking them out carefully and Alec could feel how Magnus tensed, he chuckled for himself. This was going to be fun. He looked back on the warlock and squeezed his hand calmingly. 'Still okay?' his eyes asked and Magnus nodded almost invisibly as he squeezed his hand back. Alec could see how uncomfortable Magnus was, but as long as he wanted to be there… Alec didn't complain. Alec broke their holding hands and instead put his hand around Magnus waist to pull him closer to Alec. He could feel how Magnus calmed at the touch. Then both of them headed to the bar, where Alec ordered their favourite drinks.

As they were sitting there, waiting for their drinks to be done, Magnus was nervously looking all around the bar, looking on the dancing men, on the men talking in the corners, some couples were already making out,… meanwhile Alec was looking on Magnus with smile. This man. Alec chuckled for himself. He still couldn't believe that Magnus actually asked him out on date. To gay bar. It must have been a lot for him, but he went through it all just because of Alec. That was really sweet. After few seconds the older man felt Alec gaze on himself and he looked his way.

"What?" Magnus asked nervously. Alec chuckled as he leaned closer to him, his lips almost touching Magnus' ear. "Just funny to think that powerful warlock is scared to be in gay bar." he teased him and Magnus shivered at the closeness of the younger man.

"I am not scared." Magnus frowned and Alec raised his eyebrows, taking their drinks from the bartender. "Sure." Alec winked at him. "I am not!" Magnus jokingly shouted as he pushed Alec lightly in the shoulder. "Ouch." Alec chuckled. "Why do you keep hurting me?" he joked, but Magnus froze for second, remembering their argues, but Alec didn't seem worried.

"How about we go play pool?" Alec offered, knowing that the game is something Magnus is familiar with. "Okay," Magnus chuckled, "game on Lightwood." Alec smiled. "You started it Bane." he teased as both of them headed to the table.

Alec always used to say that pool was similar to archery. Magnus did laugh at him but didn't say anything. Alec was clearly winning the game, but at one point he started feeling bad for Magnus. He sighed and undershot the white ball, loosing his turn. "Can't win 'em all."

He walked away from the table to take a sip of his beer, when he heard a shots and clattering as the balls fell in the cups on the sides of the table. When he turned around, he saw that even thought he was the winning one few seconds ago, now he was the loosing one.

"Wait, did you do the your... Thing?" he asked, waving with his hand. Magnus chuckled. "Haven't you heard the saying?" he asked as he played again. "If you can't find the one being hustled in the pool hall," he looked at him, "then it's probably you." Alec chuckled. Unbelievable. "Okay." he scoffed, "Okay?" "Yeah. Let's play." he challenged. As they both soon figured out, both of them had 'healthy' dose of the competitive spirit.

Alec chuckled. He blamed it on living with Jace, both boys always competed. It didn't even matter in what, it could be who is faster, smarted, stronger… In most cases Alec behave as good big brother and let Jace win. But as they grew up, Alec found it harder and harder. Jace was ageing and becoming stronger, faster… Alec didn't let him win anymore and Jace couldn't, or didn't want, to accept it.

They continued playing for few more rounds, when Magnus went to change a song on the jukebox. Alec took another sip of his drink and played his turn. When he looked where Magnus was taking so long, he saw him standing few metres away from the pool, talking to another man. They chuckled to something and Alec frowned.

Nope.

He quickly walked over to the man and put his hand around Magnus waist, dragging him closer to himself. He smiled on the man, "Could you excuse us?" he asked and without waiting for his response he dragged Magnus to the nearest corner.

"What?" Magnus asked, confused, "We were just talking!" he said. Alec shook his head, slightly pinning Magnus against the wall, leaning closer to him. "You know Magnus, the thing about this bar is," he said as he pressed closer to Magnus, and gosh, Magus would be lying if he said that it didn't affect him, "that everyone here is trying to get into your pants." Alec said, looking straight in his eyes.

"Oh," Magnus said, it made sense, it was gay bar after all, "so you as well?" he teased and Alec chuckled. "Yeah," he whispered as he leaned closer to Magnus, so his lips were brushing over Magnus' ear, "but I am willing to do it on your terms, these guys… they don't care what you want…" he pulled away from Magnus as he gave him quick peck on lips.

Magnus was unable to move and that only made Alec chuckle. "I am going to get more drink, do you want some?" he asked and Magnus shook his head. "Okay, don't you go anywhere!" he joked and Magnus smiled.

As Alec walked to the bar he ordered more drink, waiting for them, he turned around and looked on Magnus who was still standing in the corner, watching him as well. He smiled on him.

"Lightwood?" he suddenly heard known voice and looked on his left to see a blond man. He frowned, because he knew him, but from where… oh! From work. He was one of the officers, but Alec didn't remember his name. "Oh, hello, hi." he chuckled nervously, trying to remember the man's name.

"Underhill." the man introduced and Alec shook his head. "Right, sorry, my memory on names is so bad." he chuckled. Underhill nodded. "It's quite alright." he smiled on him. "I am actually surprised to see you here.." he confessed and Alec chuckled. "I could say the same." the man nodded. "So.. I guess we can agree on this staying between us?" he asked unsurely and Alec nodded. "Of course." he smiled on him kindly, not really thinking about it. "Maybe I can buy you a drink?" Underhill offered. Shit.

Alec offered him kind smile, but shook his head. "Sorry to disappoint, but I am already here with someone." he excused. "Oh, right, sorry!" Underhill nervously chuckled. "No problem, maybe I can help you choose someone?" he joked and Underhill shrugged.

"Very well, what's your detective opinion?" Underhill asked, "How about the guy in the yellow sweater?" Alec found the man Underhill was talking about and frowned. "Not him, he has a ring." he pointed out. "Shame." Underhill sighed and Alec looked around again, looking on the men, watching them carefully. "That one in the red t-shirt seems nice, not too frustrated and I don't think there's any woman in his life either." he recommended. "Very well, wish me luck." Underhill smiled as they raised their glasses and drank a bit.

"Good lu-" but before Alec could finish his sentence, he felt someone's lips pressed against his. He blinked as Magnus pulled away, his hand was around Alec's waist, holding it firmly, pressing him closer to Magnus. "I am Magnus," he introduced to Underhill, "Alec's boyfriend." Alec stared at him for second. _Boyfriend._ They never talked about that. About what they are. But it was nice. He smiled nervously on Underhill. "Underhill." he shook Magnus hand. "I am Lightwood's… friend… from work." Alec nodded, but Magnus was frowning on Underhill, who probably got the hint. "I believe I should go… try my luck." he excused and left.

Alec frowned but smiling looked on Magnus, who was pulling him away from the bar back to the corner. "What?" Alec asked with a chuckle. Magnus leaned closer to him, whispering in his ear. "He just wanted to get in your pants." he growled and Alec chuckled at Magnus' use of Alec's words.

"Are you jealous?" he asked and Magnus frowned. "What are you talking about?" Magnus pretended to not understand what Alec was talking about. "You are jealous!" Alec teased with smile. He was pressed against the wall, Magnus looking on him with dark eyes. "'m not." he growled. "Aww you are." Alec teased as he moved his hands up and took Magnus' head in them, cupping his cheeks. He kissed him lovingly but Magnus pulled away. Alec saw the vulnerability in his eyes. He needed to make sure Magnus wasn't worried. Alec didn't want anyone else. Just Magnus.

"I am yours Magnus." Alec whispered in the kiss and Magnus looked at him with love in his eyes. "You are mine." he whispered for himself after while. "Yeah." Alec chuckled. "And I am yours." Magnus whispered back, kissing him again.

"So boyfriend huh?" Alec asked between the kisses, he could feel Magnus tense a bit. "I like that." he added and Magnus chuckled. "Then stop talking and kiss me, boyfriend." he teased, dragging Alec closer.

The kiss was heated, both man trying to get as close as they could. Alec was actually nicely surprised. He was kissing Magnus. In gay bar. In publicity. And he didn't mind.

"Stop thinking." Magnus told him between the kisses and Alec chuckled, turning them around, so Magnus was the one pressed against the wall. "I am just happy we are here." he said and could feel Magnus smile in the kiss.

"I wanted to do something nice for you." Magnus confessed and Alec pulled away from him for second. Looking on the man he loved. "I love you." Alec blurted out, but meant it. "I love you too." Magnus smiled, pulling Alec in another kiss.

 

Soon the song changed. It wasn't that loud nor quick anymore. Instead they started playing some slow, even romantic one.

Magnus raised his hands toward Alec, dragging him in middle of the room, but the younger man refused to dance. He had not enough alcohol in him. "Come on!" Magnus whined. Alec shook his head, but Magnus didn't want to give up.

In the end Alec sighed and pulled Magnus in tight embrace, slowly dancing with him in the corner. Magnus put his arms around Alec's waist and rested his head on Alec's shoulder. Alec put his head carefully in Magnus hair, smelling it. He liked Magnus' perfume.

They were slowly dancing there for few minutes, enjoying the presence of each other. Sometimes Alec would pull away from Magnus, spinning him around and catching him again, the older man always chuckled, happily falling in Alec's strong arms. "I think I am falling for you." he joked as he fell in Alec's arms again and the younger man caught him. Alec chuckled, kissing Magnus. "I already fell for you." he whispered in his ear. "From a bridge." he added and Magnus gasped, pulling away from Alec. The younger man was laughing as well, Magnus hit him in the shoulder. "That was not funny." Alec smiled, "It was." he argued and he reached for Magnus to pull him in embrace again.

"You are idiot." Magnus mumbled against Alec's neck. "Yeah," Alec agreed, "but I am yours idiot." Magnus looked up on him and leaned in for kiss. Alec obliged him happily.

They would kiss like that for few minutes but soon it wasn't enough. Magnus' hand roamed on he back of Alec's neck and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. A moan or two escaped from Magnus mouth but he didn't care.

Pushing Magnus against the nearest wall, Alec left Magnus mouth and started pressing kisses on his neck. Magnus moaned not being used to feel so… high. His hand touched Alec's cheek, bringing his head back to Magnus'. He kissed him on the lips, deepening the kiss.

He could never get tired of kissing Alec.

After few minutes Magnus opened his eyes, looking on Alec. The younger man was already looking at him. Magnus' gaze fell behind Alec, seeing all the man in the bar, watching them with jealousy. Magnus put protectively his arms around Alec, claiming the man as his.

Alec probably sensed Magnus discomfort, to be on such show, kissing in front of everyone. After all, he had survived more than he was used to already.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Alec asked and Magnus looked on him with big eyes. He nodded. Alec smiled on him, took his hand and they together left the bar.

Suddenly it was so quiet outside. Both of them lost track of time and both were slightly drunk. They left the car where they parked and decided to walk back to Magnus' flat.

They were walking in the minor dark streets, the whole city already sleeping. Magnus took Alec's hand and intertwined their fingers. Alec felt warm, being so close, so intimate.

Alec was walking with his head raised up, looking on the stars above them. It was fascinating, how much brighter they were. There were no strong lights coming up from the city so the whole night sky was even darker, putting beautiful contrast between the darkness and star light.

"I.." Magnus spoke up suddenly and Alec looked down on him, "I really enjoyed it tonight." he whispered. Alec smiled and stopped walking, dragging Magnus in tight hug. "I enjoyed it too." he said as he kissed him in his hair.

Magnus looked up on Alec, "I was thinking that maybe…" he stuttered, and even in the dark, Alec could see him blush, "maybe we could go… again?" he asked nervously. Alec was so happy. "Of course." he chuckled, "I would love to." Magnus nodded, looking between them, on their intertwined hands.

"Thank you for breaking my marriage." he whispered quietly and Alec laughed. "You are welcome, it was my privilege." Both men laughed as they started walking again, hand in hand. "I mean it Alexander." Magnus said quietly, not looking on his boyfriend. "I know."

"I love you Alexander." Alec looked on him with huge grin, "I love you too Magnus."

 

They kept walking for few minutes until they reached the park. Alec dragged Magnus on the small hill, where they could see on the whole city below them. They sat in the cold grass, but they weren't cold, the warmth of their bodies and the warming feeling of love kept them away from coldness.

Alec lied on the grass, looking on the sky again, Magnus rested his head on Alec's chest, looking down on the sleeping city. "The sun is coming out soon." he pointed out and Alec looked down on the city. "We can stay," he whispered, "and wait for it to come out." "Okay." Magnus agreed.

Alec eventually fell asleep, but woke up to Magnus calling his name. He was lying on Magnus lap, Magnus' hand brushing through his hair. He stretched a bit but whined when Magnus stopped brushing his hair. "Don't stop." he ordered and the older man chuckled. "Sorry." He joked as he continued playing with Alec's curls. The older man chuckled.

Soon the sun came over the horizon. Magnus was sitting against the tree, his back resting on the hard cortex and Alec sat between his legs, resting on Magnus. Their hands were intertwined, playing with their fingers. They weren't talking. There was no need to do so. They both understood what the other was thinking about, without the need to say the words aloud.

The sunrise was beautiful. And Alec was so happy to spend it with Magnus. He shifted a bit, so he could lay on him more comfortable. "It's beautiful." He whispered as they saw the sun shines slowly falling on the city. "It truly is." Magnus agreed.

"You know what else is beautiful?" Magnus whispered in Alec's ear. Alec made a sound of not knowing the answer. "You." Magnus whispered flirtatiously and Alec's eyes widened.

He jumped away from Magnus, smiling. "Who are you and what have you done to my Magnus?" He joked. Magnus whined, raising his hands toward Alec. "Baby, come back!" He called after him but Alec shook his head, walking away from Magnus.

Magnus quickly jumped on his legs and started running after Alec. The younger man yelped out of surprise and started running as well.

Alec was faster, Magnus was aware. But Magnus was more devious. "You know I am jealous of you." Alec shouted on him. Magnus frowned, still trying to catch him. "Why?" he asked. "Because your partner is way hotter than mine!" Alec joked as he ran away with laugh. Magnus stopped running, trying to catch his breath instead. "Wait, but…" he inhaled, "we are dati-" Oh. Oh. Now he understood. "Come back here you little shit." he shouted on Alec, running after him again.

He chased Alec in the bushes and here waited for him, jumping on him in one unexpected moment. He caught Alec and kissed him on the cheeks. Alec tried to pull away from him, but Magnus was also strong. He pulled Alec closer against his will and leaned in another kiss.

"I just figured you deserve better boyfriend." he whispered between the kisses. Alec froze, pulling away from Magnus, his hands stroking Magnus' cheeks.

"Magnus," he said, looking straight in his eyes, "I deserve you and I don't mind taking it slow, so just don't do anything you are not comfortable with, okay?" Magnus nodded. "I am comfortable with you." he smiled. Alec kissed him slowly. "That's good, otherwise we would have a problem." Both man chuckled.

"Wanna head back?" Alec offered and Magnus chuckled. " _Wanna?_ " he mocked him with laugh. "What language are you speaking in future?" Alec shrugged, taking Magnus' hand with smile and both men headed out of the park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo, how was it? Please give me some feedback! Especially for this chapter, please and thanks :) see you soon


	27. I think I am different

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I think there's something wrong with me." He said quietly and Alec slowed down, looking on him. "Why do you think so?" He asked, worried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii, so I am back! This chapter is more focused on Raphael's, Simon's and Maia's story lines, hope you like it!

Three weeks later Magnus woke up in cold bed. He looked on his left just to see an empty space next to him. Alec was gone. Magnus sighed. It's hard to have boyfriend who is an early bird, when you like to sleep until noon. He looked on Alec's pillow and saw a paper laying on it. He reached for it. It was a note from Alec.

 

_Good morning baby,_

_Didn't want to wake you up, we are having breakfast at Catarina's. Come._

_Alec_

 

Magnus groaned, getting up from the bed. Ideally he would sleep for next three, four hours... But breakfasts at Catarina's were something he always looked forward. He put his clothes on and walked in the other apartment.

 

"Good morning." He greeted the small girls running around the apartment. "Hi Magnus!" They shouted and were gone. Magnus chuckled and walked in the living room where he found Catarina. "Morning Cat, Ragnor." The woman smiled. "Magnus! Hi, good morning." "Hey." Ragnor greeted him as he stood up from the couch where he was sitting next to Catarina. Magnus frowned.

"Where is Alec? And Raphael?" He asked. "Raphael wanted to talk about something with Alec, so they went to bakery meanwhile." "Oh." Magnus nodded. "Do you want something to drink?" Catarina asked as she walked in the kitchen. "Coffee is fine." Magnus followed her.

He needed to talk to his friends about something as well.

 

~~~

 

Alec woke up well rested. He look on his right, next to him was sleeping on the bed Magnus. Alec liked that side of him. Sleeping. He looked so peaceful. He chuckled, still couldn't understood how lucky he was to be there with Magnus, to have him just for himself. Alec slowly and carefully pulled his hand toward Magnus and put away the disobedient curls of the older man. He smiled when Magnus just murmured something and turned around.

He carefully got up from the bed and headed to Catarina. Sundays were breakfasts at Catarina's days. He knocked on the door and when he heard the girls laughing he opened them, entering the loft.

"Aaalec!" Rosa shouted, running to him. During the last few weeks Rosa and Alec became good friends. The young girl wasn't shy around him anymore. And Madzie... Was her usual charming self.

"Good morning Rosa!" Alec smiled as he took her in his arms, spinning her around. "Morning Madzie." He brushed her hair jokingly. The young warlock immediately brushed them back to the way they were before Alec touched them .

"Good morning Alec." Catarina greeted him as she entered the room with Raphael behind her. "Hi Cat, Raphael, was anyone already in bakery?" He asked. Both of them shook heads.

"Okay, I will go get something." Alec offered. "Thank you Alec." Catarina smiled on him and Alec only nodded.

"Can I..." Raphael shouted after him, "can I go with you?" He asked, Alec looked on him. "I was hoping we could talk..." He said nervously, fidgeting with his fingers. "Sure." Alec smiled and both of them walked out. On their way they met Ragnor who was just going to the flat.

 

Alec knew from experience, that if someone wanted to talk, he couldn't push them into doing it. So the whole way to bakery both men walked in silence. It wasn't uncomfortable thought.

Alec was enjoying the morning atmosphere of the city and Raphael at least could think about his thoughts for a while longer.

They stopped in the bakery, buying some rolls, fresh bread and something sweet for the girls. As they walked out, Raphael finally spoke up.

 

"I think there's something wrong with me." He said quietly and Alec slowed down, looking on him. "Why do you think so?" He asked, worried. Raphael avoided looking on him. "I don't know… I guess…" Alec looked around them and led them on one of the benches. As they sat, Alec looked on Raphael and back on his hands.

"Is it because of someone you like?" Alec tried and Raphael shrugged. "Kind of. Yes and no." he sighed. "I know you and Magnus are happy, so if I liked boys I know it would be okay…" he paused, looking for right words. "There indeed is someone I like, but…" Raphael looked on him. "I really like him, but I am not sure I can feel the same way as he does." Alec looked on him. "I don't think I ever will feel the same way as him but not because of gender or whatsoever." Alec started feeling like he knew where the conversation was going.

"I loved few people, but never enough for _the other step._ " he said and Alec nodded. That's where it was going. "I just don't want to kiss them, or sleep with them…" he sniffed, "and they always just leave me or they want to push me into it and I just…" Alec sighed, putting his arms around Raphael. "It's okay buddy," he whispered, "there's nothing wrong with you."

They were sitting there for few seconds, before Raphael pulled away. "You once told me that in future there are homosexuals, bisexuals and so on… is there a name for people like me?" He asked shyly. Alec smiled on him kindly and nodded. "People who don't feel sexual attraction are called asexuals." he told him and Raphael was looking on him with sad eyes.

"Asexuals." he whispered the word, trying how it sounds. He looked back on Alec. "So I am not the only one?" he chuckled and Alec smiled on him. "No." he said kindly. "And there's nothing bad about it Raphael." He said. "I mean it. People are of course trying to survive, it's in our nature and as well is in our nature to reproduce, but it's alright if you don't feel that way. Noone can push you in doing something you don't want to. Don't let them. Don't let anyone ever push you in anything you don't want to, okay?" The young man nodded.

They were sitting on the bench for few more seconds. "You know Raphael, I know it can seem lonely right now, thinking that noone is going to love you just for what you are. But not everyone is looking for sex, and I believe... I know that one day you will find someone who will truly love you for who you are, and you being asexual will be no problem, okay? Just don't give up on it yet."

Raphael dried his tears, nodding. "Thank you Alec." Alec smiled on him, hugging him shortly, "It's okay. That's what friends are for." The younger man chuckled.

"Can I ask you something?" Alec asked and Raphael nodded. "Of course." "Is it Simon you were talking about?" Raphael raised his eyebrows with small smile. "Am I that obvious?" He blushed and Alec laughed quietly. "Simon seems like a nice guy." He confessed. "Yeah he is." Raphael agreed.

"You're going to be okay Raphael." Alec stroked his shoulder kindly as he stood up and headed back to the apartment.

 

~~~

 

"I need to talk with you about something." Magnus blurted out as they were sitting around the table. Catarina and Ragnor looked up on him. "It's important." Magnus added.

The small girl were shouting from the other room. Catarina jumped on her chair. "Are you planning to propose to Alec!" She screamed excitedly and Magnus frowned. "What? No!" Ragnor scoffed. "So what is it?"

"I was thinking about something and before you start shouting on me how crazy I am, can you at least hear me out?" Both of his friends raised their eyebrows. "I want to open the rift back to 2018 and Alec can't know." Catarina gasped.

"Why?" she screamed, "I thought you were happy here. That he was." Magnus sighed. "It's not like that Cat... Yes we truly are happy, but.. I just… you are not there when he is sad. You don't see him when he thinks that noone is looking." he said quietly. "I see him Cat. Maybe he smiles and says everything is okay, but I can see him. I can see him hiding behind the mask he put on." He had tears in his eyes. "I love him Cat, I do, so if I can do something for him, like sending him back home, I will do it. Or at least try. That's how much I love him."

"Oh Magnus," she sighed, coming to him and hugging him tightly, "that's so sad." Magnus sighed, quickly drying his tears and shrugged. "Just… will you help me?" Ragnor frowned. "But how do you suggest we do that?" he asked. "We can't just walk there and tell them to finish the bridge as soon as possible because we need our friend to jump from it." Magnus realized Ragnor was right. The bridge Alec will fall from, isn't even standing yet. But it's so close to finishing it.

"We need to see if there's something different with the ley lines I think." he said and Catarina shook her head. "Ley lines?" she asked, "That's big. That's huge! Who probably is strong enough to corrupt them?" Magnus shrugged. "But whoever or whatever it was, it did it, so why couldn't we?" All three friends frowned.

"That's a dangerous game Magnus." Ragnor said. "I know, but I have to try. Ragnor please, I will try it with your help or without." Catarina sighed, "We both are going to help you Magnus. We are friends after all."  Magnus forced a smile. "Thank you. And please... Don't tell Alec... I don't want him to get his hopes up and then it wouldn't work out..." Before he could finish the sentence or anyone else could say something, the door opened and Alec with Raphael walked in, talking about something and smiling.

 

"Hey." Raphael greeted them and Alec smiled on Magnus. "Good morning baby." He mouthed and Magnus felt as he started blushing. "I am just going to put out the groceries and we can eat." Alec announced as he left in the kitchen, Raphael probably planned to go with him and help Alec, but the older man was faster.

"I will help you!" Magnus shouted as he ran in the kitchen, closing the door behind them. "Hi." He whispered as he pushed himself against Alec, kissing him on the lips.

Alec kissed him back with smile. "Someone slept well today." He teased between the kisses. "I hate waking up in empty bed." Magnus murmured.

Alec chuckled. "Maybe if you weren't such a sleeper you could wake up with me you know?" Magnus shook his head, sittimg on the counter. "Not gonna happen." Alec started putting out the groceries. "Stop complaining then." He said with smile.

Just when Magnus wantd to answer something, two small girls ran in the kitchen, screaming. "Caaake!" Madzie shouted, reaching fo it. Magnus pulled away from Alec, who had reflexes quick enough to take the cake away from the girl, before it could fall on the floor.

"Carefully here!" he chuckled as he handed the cake to Madzie, "but take it to the table okay?" The girls nodded and were gone. Magnus sighed as he took the plates. "Can we never be alone." he murmured just before he left the kitchen. Alec took the groceries and followed him.

 

Magnus loved breakfasts at Catarina's. The whole group -their small family- being together. They talked, they laughed, they were happy.

"So what's the plan for today?" Alec asked Raphael and Magnus looked on the young man. "Well, after breakfast I am going to his house and we will take our things to the apartment." Catarina nodded. "We have a little surprise for you as well." she said as she looked on Magnus.

"Yeah," he blurted out, "we have a party tonight, at Pandemonium, free bar, as a goodbye gift." Raphael nervously chuckled.

"I am not leaving you guys." he said, with tears in his eyes, "You are my family, I am still going to visit you." Catarina chuckled sadly, crying. "Oh I am going to miss you my boy." she whispered, dragging him in tight hug. "We all are." Ragnor agreed and the whole table stood around Raphael in group hug.

"Why are they crying?" Rosa asked Madzie and the other girl just shrugged. "Maybe they have their days?" she said, "Catarina's always crying when she has _got it_." Both girls shrugged and continued eating their cakes.

 

~~~

 

After breakfast Raphael headed to Simon's house. He was excited but nervous at the same time. He took deep breathe and knocked on the door.

"Raphael!" the woman greeted him, Simon's mother. "Simon is already waiting for you, he's in his room." she said as she let him inside. "Thank you Miss Lewis." he thanked as he ran in the room, taking the steps by two.

"Hi!" Simon smile don him when Raphael entered the room."HI." he breathed out. "Ready to move out?" he asked and both men chuckled. "Let's do this."

 

The flat they rented wasn't that big. There were two bedrooms, one bathroom and kitchen connected with living room. But it was enough and the price wasn't too high, so both of them could continue their schools and work in some shop.

"Ahh." Raphael breathe out as they brought the last box in the apartment and both of them sat on the couch- the only furniture already standing in the room. "So," Simon started as he sat next to him, "who is going to have the bigger room?" he asked. "Shit." Raphael frowned. He completely forgot about that. "Me?" he tried but Simon chuckled, hitting him playfully in the shoulder. "I am not giving up that easy, alright?" he said and Raphael looked on him.

"Well, what are we gonna do about it?" he asked and Simon thought about it for while. But before he could offer anything, Raphael jumped on him, tickling him everywhere.

Simon started laughing immediately. "Stop it!" he screamed between the laughing but Raphael didn't. Simon tried to pull away from him, but he was too distracted by the tickling. "Can you stop?" he chuckled and Raphael shook his head.

"Okay!" Simon breathed out, "Stop! I give up!" he shouted and Raphael finally stopped tickling him. Both of them were breathing quickly, sitting too close to each other. Raphael leaned a bit closer to Simon, looking in his eyes. Simon moved his head a bit closer to Raphael and suddenly it was too much.

Raphael stood up, surprising Simon. "I guess we know who won." he whispered as he ran in the bigger room and fell on the bed. What the hell was he thinking?

 

He was lying there for few minutes before the door opened and Simon entered the room, carefully lying on the bed next to Raphael. They didn't say anything, just lying there, looking up on the ceiling, their sides brushing.

Raphael looked on Simon and the other boy smiled on him kindly. Raphael smiled back.

This was it. They had their own flat. He chuckled for himself, taking the pillow and smashing Simon straigth in his face.

"Hey!" Simon huffed from behind the pillow and reached for another one, hitting Raphael back. "It's a war!" he shouted, waving with the pillow. Raphael laughed, jumping of the bed he ran in the other room, Simon following him.

After few minutes later both of them sat down on the couch, trying to catch their breaths again, calming down. Raphael chuckled. "It doesn't seem so bad so far." he joked and Simon laugh.

"Oh geez," he murmured, "I am so thirsty." he announced as he stood up, walking in the kitchen. "Do you want anything from our _blodge?"_ He asked and Raphael frowned. "Blodge?" he asked.

"It's a shortcut for blood fridge." Simon shouted back on him, "We can't walk around and talk with people about our blood fridge, can we?" he explained and Raphael laughed. "Bring it." he said with smile.

Having another vampire roomate wasn't that bad.

"Here." Simon threw a blood sack on Raphael who caught it. "Thanks." They sat on the couch and started talking as they drank the blood.

 

~~~

 

Alec entered the bar -Hunter's Moon- and found Maia immediately, the woman was cleaning the pult of the bar and washing the used glasses.

"Hey Maia!" he greeted her and she turned around with a smile, "Alec!" she hugged him. "Do you need any help here?" he offered her and the woman shrugged. "It's not that much people here anyway." she said, but Alec was already behind the bar.

"So, are you coming tonight to Pandemonium?" Alec asked. Maia raised her eyebrows. "Seriously?" she asked, "Pandemonium? Alec I know it's Magnus' but still it's a rival bar." Alec sighed. "Come on Maia. Becuase of Raphael." he tried to persuade her. She shrugged, "I will think about it." she said, trying to change the topic.

"Where is he actually moving?" she asked, Alec poured a beer for one of the men and handed it to him. "It's around 25 minutes from here, near the square." Maia nodded. "See it's not that ba-" she suddenly froze.

Alec frowned, looking on her, soon he understood that see was looking on someone else, he looked the way she was looking and saw a young man standing in front of her. He was staring on her as well.

"Maia." the starnger greeted, still shocked. "What are you doing here?" Maia scoffed. "I could ask you the same Jordan." she spat out. "Maia, I am sorry." "Oh you are sorry?" she raised her voice. "Get the fuck out of here Jordan." "Can we talk, please?" he begged, trying to come closer to her, but Maia moved away from him.

"There's nothing to talk about." she said, "You left and it's all in the past, so leave me alone now." Jordan shook his head, "Maia please let me explain." The woman sighed. "You have two minutes."

"I had to leave, if my parents, if anyone in the village found out what I have done, … they would have kill me." Maia scoffed. "So what? You decided it was better if they killed just me?" Jordan frowned, "What? No! Maia!" he threw his arms, "I was coming back for you!" he said.

"I was there, in your room, and you were there, sleeping and looking so peacefull… I thought you were okay, that you didn't change after all…" Maia shook her head.

"You are freaking coward Jordan. You abandoned me!" "But I didn't want to!" he shouted back on her, "I loved you, I still love you!" "You haven't seen me for years!" "I did, I was checking on you sometimes." he said and Maia froze.

"Are you kidding me?" she shouted on him. "You have been checking on me, but you never talked to me?" she walked to him and slapped him. "Leave Jordan." she said as she turned around. "Maia…" "NO!" she shouted on him, "You are dead for me! I don't care what you think or what you have to say, I don't care. Just leave me alone!"

Jordan tried to get back to her, but at that moment Alec stood in front of Maia and shielded her. "Haven't you heard her?" he told him angrily, "She told you to back off, so back off." Jordan was furious. "Get out of my way!" he growled on Alec, trying to get through him to Maia.

Alec caught him by his arm and dragged him closer to himself. "I told you to back off." he hissed, pushing Jordan away. "I just need to talk to her!" he tried, but Alec didn't let him go through.

Instead he put out his police badge and shoved it to Jordan's face. "One last time Jordan, leave her alone, or I will get you arrested." he threatened and shoved him out of the bar.

 

"Are you okay?" he asked Maia when he returned inside the bar. She nodded. "I think I will gladly come to Pandemonium tonight." she said and Alec smiled kindly. "Okay," he said, "let's go."

As they were walking through the streets to the next bar, Alec was looking on Maia. He hoped the woman would explain things to him, not that she had to, but it would be nice. In the end he couldn't help himself.

"So, a crazy exboyfriend?" he asked. Maia looked on him and sighed. "Jordan Kyle," she started, "he was the one who changed me." she whispered and Alec stopped walking. "He was that asshole?" he shouted unbelievably. "I am going to kill him." he growled.

Maia shook her head. "You don't have to Alec, let's just forget about him, okay?" she begged. "He doesn't mean anything to me anymore." Alec sighed and nodded.

"But it still doesn't mean he wouldn' deserve it, you know?" he said, "Maybe I could get him locked up for a night?" he offered and Maia chuckled. "Yeah that would be nice." she said and Alec smiled.

"Are you going to be okay?" he asked, looking on his best friend. "I will be fine, I always am." Alec nodded. "I know you are, but it's okay to not be." Maia forced a smile. "I know." she whispered.

Alec took her hand and they walked in the bar, holding hands.

 

~~~

 

When Raphael and Simon entered the bar, the party was already on. Raphael chuckled, smiling on Simon he took his hand and dragged him through the crowd where he saw their friends.

"Hi!" he greeted Alec, letting go of Simon's hand and hugged Alec. "Hi." the older man greeted him, "How's unpacking going?" Magnus asked as he hugged him. Raphael smiled, "It's going really well!" he shouted over the music.

After they all greeted, Alec introduced Maia to Simon and they cheered them for moving out, the real party began.

"Do you want to go dance?" Magnus asked Alec and both men left the group with stupid grins on their faces. Raphael was truly happy for them. He knew Magnus for long time and he was never as happy as he was now with Alec.

He looked on Simon, who was already smiling on him. He raised his glass toward him and smiled back. He then looked on Catarina and took her on the dancing parket, Maia took Simon and followed them.

As they were dancing, Raphael couldn't help but to glance on Simon from time to time. The other man was always looking back on him with a smile. Maybe Alec was right. Maybe he would find someone who would love him for who really was.

He honestly believed that he could be happy. After all he had been through, didn't he deserve something nice for once?

He smiled on Simon, but this time he hasn't look away. As they were dancing there, in middle of the crowd, their eyes nor separating, Raphael honestly felt happy. He didn't notice Alec and Magnus watching them with knowing smiles.

Suddenly Maia leaned closer to Simon and whispered something in his ear. Simon frowned and looked on her, nodding. She leaned closer to him and kissed him, smillimg pulling away. She brushed his cheek and took his hand, dragging him away.

Raphael froze. He suddenly couldn't breathe nor move. That was not fair. Simon likes him, or does he? The man looked back on Raphael with shock in his eyes, but Raphael was already gone.

He wasn't angry. He wasn't sad. He just felt empty. As he was trying to make his way out of the bar he met Alec. Before the older man could say anything, Raphael just shook his head.

He didn't want to hear it now. He didn't want their pity. He just wanted to be alone.

 

 

He walked in his... _Their..._ Flat and took a sack of blood, laying on the couch. He wasn't sure how long he was lying there, but he just couldn't sleep.

After few minutes he heard the door open and quietly close. Simon came back. Raphael shifted a bit, pretending to be asleep just to avoid the conversation. He didn't want to talk to anyone, especially not Simon.

The other men entered the living room and just stood there for few seconds. Raphael hoped that if he will lie there for few seconds, pretending to be asleep that Simon will leave, that apparently wasn't Simon's intention.

"I know you're not sleeping Raph." Simon whispered, not moving, still standing in the door. "Are you okay?" He asked and Raphael shifted. "I am okay, just tired." He murmured, hoping that Simon will not figure out that he was crying just few minutes ago.

"You are not okay Raph." Simon said as he walked closer to the couch. "I am just tired." Raphael answered bit harshly than he planned to. Simon sighed as he sat on the couch next to Raphael.

"Is it because of Maia?" He asked and Raphael turned around to look on his friend. _Yes._ "No." He groaned as he lied back. "Raphael," Simon began, "that was nothing, she just saw her ex boyfriend and she needed to get off him." He explained. "I would never kiss her, anyone as long as you are here."

Raphael sat on the couch next to Simon, but still made sure to avoid his gaze. "I don't want to kiss anyone else, okay?" He assured him and Raphael looked up on him.

I am sorry." He blurted out. Simon smiled lightly, "It's okay." He whispered, but Raphael shook his head. "It's not."

"I am not like Maia Simon, I am not like anyone else." He said, raising his voice a bit. "I know, that's kind of the point." Simon chuckled as he leaned closer to Raphael. He was going to kiss him.

Raphael jumped off the couch. "I can't do this." He shouted. "I can't." He took deep breath. "I am sorry Simon."

The other man was still sitting on the couch, looking up on him. "Is it... Because we are both men?" He asked unsurely. "No!" Raphael spat out, "No. I just ... That's not me.." "I don't understand." Simon whispered. Raphael was honestly getting frustrated.

He is going to loose him. He will never be loved. "I can't do this," he was waving with his hands, "I don't want to kiss people nor have sex with them." He looked on Simon who was just sitting there. "I can't give you what Maia can. And I understand that you want more and that's okay... So I just..." Simon was looking on him with tears in his eyes. "I am sorry." Raphael whispered and ran out of the room in his bedroom and lied in the bed, hiding under the covers.

He was tired. He couldn't even cry anymore. So he just lied in the bed, looking on the wall. Suddenly he felt something climbing on the bed next to him.

"I don't care if you don't want to kiss me Raph, that's not why I like you." Simon whispered as he carefully put his hands around Raphael. We can work it out, okay? I am not going anywhere." "Okay." Raphael whispered back, falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is gonna be fluff!!! Malec fluff I promise! <3 How did you like this chapter? Please leave a comment ;)


	28. We are going on trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus groaned. "You little shit," he whispered, "you prepared all this, didn't you?" Alec chuckled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:  
> Alma Cogan, Blue Tango  
> Sammy Cahn, Day by day  
> Cadillac Baby - Roy Brown

"Morning baby." Alec whispered, placing small kisses all over Magnus' face, trying to wake the older man up. "Mhm." the older man murmured, turning around, away from Alec.

"C'mon Magnus, wake up." Alec tried again. "What time is it?" Magnus growled, hiding under the blanket. "7 am." Alec whispered, knowing, that Magnus is going to protest loudly. "WHAT?" Magnus groaned, pulling the blanket over himself and kicking Alec out of the bed.

"Leave me alone." Alec chuckled. His boyfriend was unbelievable. "I can't baby." he said, "I have a surprise for you." Magnus shifted to get in more comfortable position. "It can wait." "No it can't." Alec said as he took the covers from Magnus, who yelped in surprise.

"Why are you doing this to me Alexander!?" he shouted on him, annoyed that he can't get his sleep. "Aww, baby, come on, we need to hit the road." he said as he put the blankets back on the bed, but in safe distance from Magnus.

"Where?" Magnus asked, confused. "That's surprise." Alec teased. "Get dressed and I will maybe tell you." "What about work?" Magnus tried, but Alec was prepared. "I called Luke to take a day off and Ragnor will fill in for you." Magnus groaned. "You little shit," he whispered, "you prepared all this, didn't you?" Alec chuckled.

"I love you!" he shouted on him as he left in the kitchen. Magnus sighed as he resigned. After all, he couldn't say no to Alec. He dressed up and put on some make up before he headed in the other room, where Alec was already sitting.

The younger man smiled as he entered. "Here." he said, pointing the cup of coffee toward Magnus. "Let's eat and we can go." Magnus frowned as he sat. "Where?" he asked and Alec smiled, he was excited. "On a trip."

"A trip?" Magnus frowned. "You seriously woke me up at 7 just to go on trip?" he whined and Alec shook his head with smile. "Think of it as a date maybe?" Alec said with teasing smile and Magnus froze. A date? Did Alec planned them another date? Alec noticed how Magnus suddenly calmed down and cheered himself.

It wasn't going to be that bad in the end.

 

After breakfast both men packed some clothes and with bags in their hands they headed to Magnus' car. They put the bags in the trunk and Magnus drove off. Alec was holding the map and navigating Magnus. Often he was really thankful for his army job, because it prepared him for so many things and life situations.

For real, how many people in 2018 would be able to work with map? In time, where everyone has a mobile phone, or navigation, who is really able to use old good maps?

Alec expected them to be driving for around 3 hours, but it was definitely worth it. It was Maia who told him about these places, where people could rent small cottages for few days and Alec definitely reached after that option.

One small cottage just for Magnus and Alec, hidden in woods, far far away from socialization, away from the judgmental eyes. Isolated from the outside world… Alec liked that idea, Magnus would hopefully too.

"Here turn left." Alec ordered Magnus and the older man did so. "How long do we keep driving?" he asked and Alec looked on the map, thinking. "About two hours? I think." he said and Magnus nodded.

At some point of the drive Magnus turned on the radio and started singing with the songs. Alec chuckled, not knowing the songs lyrics, he just kept listening to Magnus singing. He wasn't a bad singer, he really wasn't.

 _"Here I am with you,"_ he sang, _"in a world of blue."_ Alec smiled on him with heart eyes. _"And we are dancing to the tango we loved when first we met."_ Alec still couldn't understand how he got so lucky to get to be with Magnus. _"While the music plays, we recall the days, when our love was a tune that we couldn't soon forget."_ Magnus looked back on Alec for second and smiled.

 _"As I kiss your cheek, we don't have to speak."_ Alec chuckled, leaning closer to Magnus and giving him a quick peck on his cheek. _"The violins, like a choir, express the desire we used to know not long ago. So just hold me tight in your arms tonight,"_ Magnus looked on Alec with love in his eyes. _"And this blue tango will be our thrilling memory of love."_ he finished singing and Alec chuckled. "That was nice." he smiled and Magnus put his hand on Alec's tight, smiling.

Another song started playing and Magnus chuckled as he recognised it. He looked on Alec, asking for approval to sing and Alec just nodded. As long as he could be there with Magnus and seeing him be happy, Alec was happy as well.

 _"Day by day, I'm falling more in love with you,"_ Magnus started singing, _"And day by day, my love seems to grow. There isn't any end to my devotion."_ Alec smiled, looking on Magnus. _"It's deeper, dear, by far than any ocean. I find that. Day by day you're making all my dreams come true."_

_"So come what may, I want you to know, I'm yours alone, and I'm in love to stay, as we go through the years day by day. I'm yours alone, and I'm in love to stay as we go through the years day by day."_

Alec didn't even realize he was staring on Magnus and that he totally forgot to pay attention on the road. Few minutes later Magnus had to stop on the nearest gas station, and that was when Alec realized what happened.

"Alexander?" Magnus called him for several times already, when the younger man came back from his thoughts. "What's wrong?" Alec looked up from the map. "Promise me you don't get mad." he whispered and Magnus frowned. "Alexander what is it?" he asked with even more concern in his voice.

"I got… distraught?" Alec tried to avoid the subject, but Magnus raised his eyebrows, "And?" "And we might have been driving the wrong way?" Alec squeaked quietly. It took Magnus a minute to understand what Alec was talking about. "You were singing and I kind of forgot to pay attention to the road…"

"Oh." Magnus breathe out, hardly trying to not to laugh. He couldn't hide it anymore. He bursted out laughing and Alec looked up on him. "What?" he asked quietly and Magnus had what to do to not kiss him. Instead he hugged him quickly, still laughing.

"I am sorry." he said when he calmed down a bit. "It's just," he took deep breath, "you got distracted, by me, and now we are lost." "We are not lost." Alec whispered ashamed. "Aww baby, I am so glad you like my singing." he teased and Alec rolled his eyes.

"Shall we drive then?" Magnus offered as he started the car. "In the right direction if possible." Magnus asked teasingly and Alec rolled his eyes. "To the right and we will keep on that road until we reach the city where you needed to pee so badly." Alec joked back and Magnus gasped. "It wasn't that bad!" "You almost pissed your trousers!" Alec laughed and Magnus jokingly smashed him in the shoulder.

 

"What?" Magnus asked after few minutes of driving, Alec was looking on his hand which was holding the gearstick. Alec looked up on Magnus and shrugged. "Just looking." he said and looked back in the map. "Looking how I drive?" Magnus asked and raised his eyebrows. Alec shrugged again.

"Are we driving the wrong way again?" Magnus joked and Alec shook his head, smiling lightly. "I just, I am just looking how you drive." Magnus chuckled. "Seriously?" Alec nodded. "Seriously. It's weird. To drive... Like that." He pointed on the gearstick.

Magnus frowned. "Alexander... You never drove a car? Do you know how to drive?" He asked. "I did. And I know how to drive, just not these cars." He confessed. "These cars?" Magnus chuckled. "Yeah!" Alec shrugged, "Manual ones." he specified.

"Yeah manual, are there any others?" Alec shot him a look. "…No?" he said innocently, not wanting to change the course of history. "Oh my god there are!" Magnus squeaked. "What is it like? To drive future cars?" Alec sighed rolling his eyes.

"It's not that big deal." he said. "Oh it is!" Alec shook his head with smile. "It's just automatic cars!" Magnus frowned. "What?" "It means you don't have this.. Thing.. Gearstick.." he pointed on the stick, "you don't need it, because the car is doing that job by itself." Magnus was still frowning. "Are you for real?" he asked and Alec nodded with chuckle.

"So you don't know how to drive?" he asked. "I do!" Alec sighed. "But automatic ones, not manual ones." "I see." Magnus said as he stopped the car. Alec frowned. "What are you doing?" he asked, confused.

"I am not doing anything, but you, you are going to drive now." Magnus pulled the car on the side and parked it there, opening the door. Alec froze. "No!" he shouted. "I don't want to." Magnus chuckled, getting out of the car. "I am not driving, so if you want to get there today, you will have to." he said.

When Magnus saw that Alec wasn't getting out of the car, he just smiled and lied on the bonnet of the car. It took Alec just few seconds, before the younger man opened his door as well and walked over to the other side of the car. On his way, as he was walking next to Magnus, he hit him lightly on the chest. Magnus laughed with groan.

Alec sat behind the wheel and took deep breath. Soon Magnus sat on the passengers seat with smile. "Stop it." Alec hissed, which caused Magnus to laugh lightly.

When he finally stopped laughing he put his hand on Alec's tight and leaned closer to him, "I am sorry baby, but you will be okay." "I might be okay, but you are not, if you don't stop the teasing." Alec warned. Magnus pulled away and nodded. "Sounds fair."

"Okay, so put your seatbelt on," Magnus teased him and Alec rolled his eyes. "Thanks baby." he said ironically, which earned him another smile from Magnus. Honestly how could he keep being angry, when Magnus was looking so happy?

"Now the pedals," Magnus announced, pointing on the pedal on far left. "That's clutch, in middle is brake and on the right is the accelerator." Alec sighed, because he already knew that much, but he didn't interrupt Magnus.

"The clutch is disengaging the engine from the wheels. When one or both are spinning, the clutch allows you to switch gears without grinding the teeth of each separate gear." Magnus explained and Alec nodded. So far so good, he thought. "Also!" Magnus suddenly remembered something, "the clutch has to be pushed every single time you change the gear, okay?" Alec hummed in agreement.

"Alright, let's get started." Magnus said and Alec started the engine, putting the handbrake down. He looked nervously on Magnus, who nodded on him encouragingly. "Clutch is pushed down," he said and Alec nodded, knowing it's already down, "Gearstick into first gear." Alec moved it, looking again on Magnus.

"Now comes the tricky part." he announced and Alec's eyes widened. "Calm down darling, you will be okay." "That's helpful." Alec scoffed. "Start slowly lifting your foot up from the clutch pedal…" "And?" "Just do it Alexander." The younger man started lifting his foot slowly. "Okay, now, press slowly and carefully the accelerator." Magnus announced and Alec nodded, slowly pushing it down.

He pushed it down way too much and the car jumped, dying immediately after. Alec yelped in surprise, looking on Magnus who was trying to hide his smile. "What?!" he shouted. "It's quite alright Alexander," Magnus said calmly and put his hand on Alec's shoulder. "That's the tricky part. You have to slowly lifting up clutch and at the same time and if possible same pressure pressing the accelerator down or it will stall."

Alec sighed. "Can't you just drive instead?" Magnus shook his head. "Too tired." he announced, "That's what you get for waking me up at 7 in the morning." Alec scoffed. "Try it again darling." he said supportingly.

It took Alec few more tries to start the car, when they finally hit the road again. Magnus carefully explained Alec how to shift up to a higher gear. Luckily the younger man understood that one quite quickly.

Few hours later they FINALLY managed to reach their destination. During the way, while Alec was pretty quickly improving his manual-car-driving skills he also managed to explain Magnus how the cars in future works, which was kind of fun, especially when he told him about the elecronic ones or the ones which didn't need the driver anymore. Future is crazy.

 

Alec stopped the car and jumped out of it, happy that both of them survived it. Magnus was just right behind him. When Alec turned around he looked on Magnus and chuckled, hugging him. Magnus pressed a small kiss on his cheek. "So here we are." he whispered, looking around them. "Yeah." "It's really nice." Alec smiled.

"Shall we unpack?" he offered and both men took their bags, entering the small cottage together. It wasn't that big, one room was bathroom, then bedroom and kitchen was connected with something, that could be called living room.

After they unpacked, they decided to go for a short walk around the near lake. It wasn't dark yet and it was nice to get out of the city for once.

When they came back, Magnus went for some wood and they set on a small fire in front of the cabin.

 

As they were sitting around the fire, talking about everything and nothing, the sky darkened slowly and soon small lightning stars appeared. Alec looked up and smiled.

"Tell me something about stars." Magnus suddenly blurted out. Alec looked down on him and smiled. "Sorry," he chuckled, "it's just amazing how bright they are..." Magnus took his hand carefully, "I mean it Alexander. Tell me something. You are interested in them and I want to know something about it as well." Alec tilted his head and smiled, intertwining their fingers.

"Over there," he pointed with his free hand, "the three stars next to each other are called Orion's belt." Magnus nodded as he shifted his hand, conjuring a thin line between the stars, so he could see it easier.

Alec chuckled, squeezing Magnus' hand. "Then there are two stars below the belt, that's Orion's lower body." Magnus nodded, connecting those stars as well. "The constellation continues above now," he pointed higher than before.

"There are three stars making Orion's upper body, on the left is his bow and on the left is his raised hand." Magnus nodded as he connected all the stars, so they were looking on the constellation of Orion. "Is that why you like it?" He asked, "because of the bow?" Alec thought about it for while.

"Yeah, probably." Magnus smiled on him. And those stars under the belt, are they Orion's penis?" He joked as he drew the line there. Alec was frowning first, not understanding what Magnus was talking about but then he saw it.

"Oh gosh Magnus!" He shouted on him, pushing him away from himself, "Now I can't ever unsee that!" Magnus started laughing.

"I miss moments like this." He suddenly whispered and Alec looked on him. "What moments?" He asked quietly. "Like these, where I don't have to pretend. Where we both are happy... And free." Alec smiled on him kindly, embracing him in the warming hug.

"I love you Alexander." He whispered in his neck and Alec's hand roamed in his hair, playing with Magnus' disobedient curls. "I love you too." He said back as he pressed a small kiss on Magnus' forehead.

There are sometimes moments when everything feels right. Moments when you realize that the person you are with is the one you want to be with forever. And Magnus knew that now was the right time. He was sure that he wanted Alec. And he wanted him now.

Magnus started pressing small innocent kisses on Alec's neck. His one hand roamed in Alec's hair, the other reached under Alec's t-shirt.

"Are you okay?" Alec asked as he pulled slightly away from Magnus. The older man looked on him for a second. He was sure. Magnus immediately pressed his lips against Alec's. Alec chuckled pulling away from Magnus. "I am not complaining baby but what's going on?" He asked. Magnus looked up on him.

"I just thought that we could take the next step?" He asked nervously and to his surprise Alec didn't complain. "Are you sure?" he asked instead and Magnus nodded, kissing him again. Alec leaned in the kiss immediately, his hand behind Magnus' neck, dragging him closer.

After few minutes of heated kissing, when both men were half undressed, Alec pulled away from Magnus. "We should probably take this… inside." he offered and Magnus chuckled. Alec helped him in his feets and both of them ran in the cabin, locking the door.

As they finally reached the bedroom, neither of them had jacket nor t-shirt. "Condoms?" Magnus asked quietly and Alec nodded. "In the night table." Magnus let out a surprised chuckle. "I would almost think that you were planning this." he said as Alec kissed him again. "I was hoping." he said with smile. "But no pressure okay?" he said seriously and Magnus nodded.

"Don't worry, I want this." he whispered as he pushed Alec down on the bed.

 

~~~

 

Alec woke up to a warm feeling. He looked on his side and saw Magnus lying on him. He smiled, remembering all the events from last night.

Oh how long he longed to be with Magnus. And yesterday he finally was. Alec was honestly surprised, how long they went on. It wouldn't be lying if someone said they had no sleep at all. They really didn't, because as Alec found out, Magnus was longing to be with him as well. He also wanted to experience as much as he could. During one night. Not that Alec minded.

Magnus shifted in his sleep and moved closer to Alec. The younger man chuckled, his hand reaching in Magnus' hair, playing with it, with it's disobedient curls. He adored Magnus' hair, how soft it was.

He leaned closer to his still sleeping lover and pressed a light kiss on his forehead. "I love you Magnus." he whispered, playing with his hair. Magnus shifted again, slowly opening his eyes. "I love you too." he whispered and Alec smiled on hm.

"I could get used to this." Magnus whispered, as Alec put his hand on Magnus' cheek and brushed it slowly. "To what?" He asked. Magnus looked up on him. "To waking up with you." He whispered.

"You already are." Alec chuckled and Magnus shrugged. "It would be nice if you could be there every single day..." He said quietly. Alec's eyes widened.

"Magnus..." He tried but the older man interrupted him. "It's okay." He said, "I am not asking you to move in... I am just telling you that if you would like to... There's the possibility and I wouldn't mind.

Alec smiled. "Thank you." He kissed him, "I will move when Maia decides to kick me out." Magnus chuckled. "Okay." He whispered. "That sounds like a plan." He said and Alec nodded.

Magnus sighed as he stretched a bit. "We should probably hit the road..." Alec smiled sadly. "Yeah... We should..." Magnus chuckled, trying to get out of the bed. As he stood up, he groaned quietly.

"Are you okay?" Alec asked and the older man just nodded. "I am afraid you will have to drive since I can still feel you inside." He confessed and Alec took his hands, dragging him back in the bed and hugging him. "I am sorry." He whispered in his hair, but Magnus shook his head. "Don't be, I had fun." He smiled on Alec and kissed him.

"Just for your information," Alec said as both of them finally got out of the bed. "I can still feel you inside as well." He winked on Magnus and left the room. Magnus groaned. Such a tease. How is he supposed to survive even one day if Alec behaves like that?

 

Just as they walked out of the cabin and locked it, Magnus realised that they were really leaving. Leaving their small bubble. And suddenly he really really didn't want to. He wanted to walk back, lock them away from the outside world and stay forever with Alec.

He pressed Alec against the car and kissed him with all he had. "I love you." he whispered. Alec smiled. "I love you too." "Can we stay here a few more minutes?" Magnus asked and Alec nodded. "Okay."

They both sat to the fireplace and hugged each other, continuing to make out. If they were going to come back to the judgmental society, they would use their few last moments wisely.

"I love you." Magnus whispered, before they sat in the car and drove home. They weren't talking, there was nothing to talk about, because both of them knew, what the other was thinking about. The radio was playing quietly.

 

_We're gonna ride all night long_

_._

_We're gonna ride all night long_

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_We're gonna ride all night long_

_._

_We're gonna ride, baby, all night long_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKay guys, I hope you liked this chapter,  
> this chapter is also the last one FOR NOW, I just need to take few days away from this story, to take some small break. Meanwhile I am already working on one small one shot, so don't worry I am not leaving. I promise, soon you will have more chapters :)) Thanks for everything

**Author's Note:**

> Please, share what you think that's going on! Was it just a coincidence that it was Magnus who found him there? And what role is Mr. Ba-Li playing in there? How is Alec going to get back to 2018?  
> Stay tuned! #everythingisconnected  
> (also, you can find me on tumblr: annie4m)


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